Reviews for Moss Rose
LittleWickedOne chapter 1 . 7/9/2014
Wow, this is such a wonderful little story! You are a very capable writer, and your grammar and stylistic choice are nigh on impeccable. I think this story is very sweet and lovely in nearly every way, it is definitely a favorite! Please write more! I only caught two wee little errors that I thought I would tell you about, because I always appreciate it when someone points them out to me.

"...drawn from the same template as every other tombstone in the cemetery." Here you just need to refer to the comparison aspect again by adding 'was' after 'cemetary' so it would read: "...drawn from the same template as every other tombstone in the cemetery was." It's a simple thing, I forget about it sometimes myself, but it's like saying "my cooking is better than Jamie." No, you mean your cooking is better than Jamie's cooking, not better than Jamie herself. In the same way, you're not taller than Jamie, you're taller than Jamie IS.

"I work for a pharmaceutical company doing research." You just need a comma after 'company.'

Also, just stylistically, the part where you list the mother's name and lifetime as inscribed on her gravestone, I like the way you used it to emphasize the narrator's slight bitterness about her mother's death appearing strangely normal and mundane, but I question the last-minute addition of such specific details. Perhaps you think differently, but I like short stories to focus more on the details of the story itself and the message they imparts without focusing on meaningless data. It also lends a great deal of versatility to entirely leave out the name and time-setting, which were not needed to fulfill the story; in this way, it could have occurred at any point based on the reader's discretion, and they can fill in their own possible names for the characters. It just seemed like a rather clunky and unneeded addition to me, but it's just a thought.

Again, GREAT read, very touching, you are a wonderful author!