Reviews for The Turn
She Doesn't Row chapter 1 . 7/31/2014
Hi! First thing's first: English is only your second language? Well let me just say that this story was written excellently! It flows really well, the language used was fantastic, and the chapter was structured really nicely! So kudos to you! I'll admit there were a number of times when a word or two was a bit off, but it was never off-putting.

I think the way you characterised Farhan and Hakem, and the way you went about incorporating their back-stories, was well done. I was a little unsure as to whether they were men or boys (teenagers perhaps?) but their relationship, namely the dedication Farhan had for his brother, was touching, and you wrote about the tragedy of Haken's impending death in a lovely way. I also think your descriptions were really nicely done, not over the top but enough to create a great atmosphere to the story. I also really like how the pacing picked up towards the end once the other men arrived and then all hell broke loose! It's the zombie apocalypse!

All in all, I think this is really great so far, the concept and story seem promising from this prologue, and even the summary, and your writing is superb! I'm excited to read more, nice work! :)