|Reviews for Bloom Lunacy|
| augie.toaste chapter 27 . 11/30/2014
And so it comes to an end. :(
There was no way that anyone was going to predict the ending to this story, but I didn't expect it to be so... warm. Relationships tentatively mending. Adjusting to new ways of living. It seems so... normal... after all the crazy, violent, shenanigans.
The quality of the wordsmithing, as always, is great. You have a way with taking a bunch of words and shoving them together in a way that makes you out to be incredibly intelligent. I love your descriptions and the viewpoints of the characters.
The plot is... er... :)
You've done a really good job at fleshing out the characters, and developing them. Annabel is a runaway success. Darren too. I spent the whole story worried that he was going to die.
The concepts are amazing. Many laughs and cringes for your interpretation of the fey.
Today's the last day of November. Did you do nano again?
| augie.toaste chapter 24 . 10/22/2014
YES! Annabel has just catapulted herself up to Number 1 on my favourite characters of this story list.
| Dr. Self Destruct chapter 3 . 10/11/2014
Damn. Tarael sounds like one creepy motherfucker. I love that description, though. So unique and terrifying. Makes me think of the Jersey devil or something. I'm still trying to figure out what's going on between him and Ambiguel (sounds like "ambiguous," haha. Guessing that was intentional since he doesn't seem to have a completely defined shape). I get that Ambiguel was chasing him for some type of Hunt, but why? Did Tarael do something wrong? It's good that you create these types of questions this early in, because they totally string the reader along and make them want to keep reading. That's one thing my creative writing professor said to try and do: create questions and answers with each major scene, because it creates a chain of satisfaction in the reader when they have a question answered, even if that answer turns into more questions. It's like a chain reaction of dopamine, lol. A reader high.
Pretty cool how Emma wrecks that guy after she gets turned into a werewolf. And I'm really intrigued by how she thinks she's a fairy princess - why? Did some fairy princess' spirit get absorbed into her, or is it just her imagination running crazy because whatever it is that turned her into a werewolf sorta messed with her brain? Again, awesome questions that'll make me want to keep reading. :) And it's pretty hilarious she thinks she's a fairy princess when she's a werewolf, LOL.
The only suggestion I have is to maybe stick with Emma's POV from sections 5 to 8. While I really like the rotating POV between the two narrators and I think you do a wonderful job keeping their voices unique from each other, I think right there it jumps a bit too much, especially in the middle of the action. I don't think there's anything you tell us from Tarael's POV in section 6 that we wouldn't be able to get through Emma, so I'd suggest just sticking with her because POV shifts can rip a reader out of the narrative, and it can take some time to settle back into another character. In the middle of a fight scene might not be the right time to take that risk...but it is kinda cool to see it from Tareal's eyes too, because he's a bystander. I don't know - that's up for you to decide. Go with your gut. :)
This review was brought to you by: The Review Game's October Review Marathon (link in my profile).
| Dr. Self Destruct chapter 2 . 10/11/2014
You have such beautiful writing. Very descriptive in a way that makes it feel unique. Everything is described in a new, fresh way, to the point where the entire world itself feels alive. I really like how you're able to weave the setting of the world into the beginning scene without using an info-dump - it all feels so natural and organic to the situation, and it creates that iceberg effect of only seeing 10% of the world but being quickly convinced the other 90% exists behind the scenes. Plus your opening...very attention grabbing, and I love how you start this story off at a run. I also like how you hint at what exactly Tarael is without telling us what he is - you show us and let us imagine it ourselves. Since there's mention of werewolves in the summary, I'm picturing something canine-like. And with Ambiguel, it's so cool what you do with the imagery of the tornado and mist.
Emma is adorable, too. I know how she feels talking through the woods looking for fairies. I used to do that with dragons. Of course, at the time I didn't understand how bad it would have been had I actually FOUND a dragon, lol. But yeah, you show the whimsy of a young child perfectly, especially a child caught up in myths and fairy tales that allow her imagination to run wild.
This review was brought to you by: The Review Game's October Review Marathon (link in my profile). Feel free to come by and check us out. :)
| augie.toaste chapter 20 . 10/11/2014
Oh, how I do love your updates.
I've been following along, and every time I don't think it can get much weirder/crazier - it does. As with all nano-ish projects, I wonder if some of the descriptions are you keeping yourself amused. There are times when you zero in and describe some minute event in lots of detail, and then times when you gloss over a lot and just focus on the action or getting characters from A to B. If you do edit this piece, maybe consider more consistency.
Looking forward to the fight - I hope the Queen wins and Darren survives.
| augie.toaste chapter 15 . 9/30/2014
I think I feel more sorry for Darren than I do for Emma.
Also, I think this rates as one of the most awkward hug scenes.
| augie.toaste chapter 6 . 9/9/2014
I don't even know what tamales are, but I want one.
shushshush'd - you've managed to make a onomatopoeia verb.
| augie.toaste chapter 5 . 9/9/2014
My new favourite and colour is Grpurple. I'm not even going to explain what it is if people ask. The story is still funny at the strangest times - exploding mosquitoes?! I am getting the sense that this is uncensored crazy from your brain. Interesting.
| augie.toaste chapter 4 . 9/4/2014
It's interesting that the normal exchange between Anabel and Emma made the whole thing more ridiculous. Emma's POV is the best. I bet you had fun writing it.
Part 12 also brings in something new - more of an integration between Emma and Tarael's worlds. The conversation made me laugh so hard.
Things are coming along nicely, Solemn. Looking forward to the new update.
| augie.toaste chapter 3 . 9/4/2014
I couldn't stop laughing. I really don't know whether you're being serious or taking the piss! The mixture of action, comedy, and super serious moment of life or death is very absurdist/gestalt. :)
| augie.toaste chapter 2 . 9/4/2014
Love it. Love the moments of comedy. You know what this reminds me a little of? Your Whitekeep story. Except it doesn't read quite like you're taking the piss. And no one has emerald eyes... yet. And things look like they're about to get really intense.
No critique at all yet. From your preface, I was half expecting you to have drawn the manuscript with their non-dominate hand in crayon. Stop being misleadingly apologetic.