Author’s way of storytelling is so good, I suggest you join NovelStar’s writing competition, you might be their next big star.

I spent this whole story thinking Johnny liked his sister. You might want to reword that part at the beginning because the pronouns made it a little unclear who you were referring to, haha.

I like that you deal with two issues here - first crush and overcoming self-doubt, both of which are things teens deal with.

Great story. Did not expect the milly thing at the end. Maybe next time describe the game a little more as he was playing to build up suspense? just a thought but otherwise great story!

Lauren! Good job! I have to say, the second to last paragraph had me laughing...i heard "jealous of your mad ball skills" in MisterEpicMann's voice. Also, "if you hurt her, you will die." had me laughing hard...it seemed so casual. Anyways, back on topic. I liked the development of the storyline, i think you used a good amount of detail and you obviously took your time on it...good job!

Nice plot twist at the end! I was wondering how Johnny knew that Jason was good at basketball if they always put him on the bench though? Just elaborate on that a lil bit.

I finally figured out how to publish this