|Reviews for band-aids|
| Little girl Big world chapter 1 . 10/26/2014
"regret is like a firefly,
it appears at night and
it shines really bright."
-loved these lines!
i can relate to a lot of the emotions going on in this piece.
you have a great talent for writing
| Scrappy LeMonte chapter 1 . 9/18/2014
First, I hope you're writing figuratively, not literally! But your id, 'mylifeisover' worries me. It's not over; you are the captain of your fate, you are the master of your soul. You're going to live, and you will feel better. Then, about your poem, I liked it. I liked the structure of your stanza, then the response following. If you wanted to tweak it, my suggestion would be that you clarify the relationship between these two voices. I thought they might be sisters, since mention is made of fighting over toys. However, I also thought this could be someone talking to herself, or a girlfriend/boyfriend exchange. Also, I'm inferring that something happened to make the Stanza Voice upset, but I can't figure out what happened. So I would go one way or the other: 1) focus on the feelings, or 2) focus on the events. If you want to focus on the feelings, you'd drop the references like, 'save me from this,' 'not over this,' 'I need advice,' etc.; if you want to focus on events, you'd add specifics of the event. I'm going to follow you! Keep writing!