Reviews for Scheherazade
schehrezade2005 chapter 9 . 7/19/2015
There does seem to be a lack of traffic, doesn't there? Kind of sad - because of the sheer volumes of stories, stuff gets overlooked and people can miss some super writing.

That said, I really enjoyed this project and my congratulations on finishing it. It's definitely an accomplishment. I hope you can keep sticking with the writing - your style really drew me in and the way you constructed your characters made me like them, even if they only really had a minor role.

Thank you for sharing!
schehrezade2005 chapter 8 . 7/19/2015
There's very much a Jekyll/Hyde dichotomy to Kowalski that seems much more prevalent in these last couple of chapters. It makes her a more sympathetic character and helps illustrate the reality behind the Syndicate and its mission. I mourn the loss of the character, and I hope that perhaps somewhere in the literary heaven for dead characters she feels vindicated.

And Scheherazade's name is revealed! But I still feel like there is a lot of mystery associated with her character that we may or may not get to in the remaining chapters... As for Lina, even though she was given an out, she still has a big decision to make and some trouble ahead of her. The question is, will she be able to gather the resources she needs to help her and Marin completely disappear, or will she merely hide in plain sight?
schehrezade2005 chapter 7 . 4/13/2015
It worked. ;-)
schehrezade2005 chapter 6 . 3/30/2015
Well, I didn't think it was a complete lull - we're still getting some information about the characters and they're getting much more rounded out.

Sounds like Scheherazade is prone to some sort of panic attack by the way she zones out, and I'm starting to think that perhaps the song she's singing has another meaning associated with it...and Lina's clearly ingested some night-night juice that was in the water, which doesn't look like it could potentially bode well for her. I mean, I'm sure she'll be fine, and it was accidental, but again, can't help but draw some other implications: does our storyteller have an ulterior motive? If she had an inkling that the water had been tampered with, why let a woman whom she might call a friend drink it?

I could be reading a little too much into this, but I am sure some of this will get clearer as the story goes on and more chapters get posted. Keep up the great work! I look forward to reading more!
schehrezade2005 chapter 5 . 3/2/2015
The idea of a mnemonist is interesting - it's definitely an apt term for people who can remember/memorize things/ideas/etc. And I have a feeling that now that we've gleaned this fact about our storyteller, the tactics for the Syndicate are going to change... Obviously, Lina's starting to struggle a little bit more with separating the idea of Scheherazade as a friend versus an enemy. She knows that Scheherazade is a member of a terrorist organization, yet the more time she spends with her, the more she finds herself relating to her captor - almost like Lima syndrome (the opposite of Stockholm syndrome) - and I'm betting it's going to cause some more second guessing in the future.

Also: I love Welcome to Night Vale. It's the shit. I can't say 'what an asshole' without hearing Cecil's voice in my head.

Can't wait for more! And...stay out of the dog park. ;-)
albusnimbus chapter 4 . 2/11/2015
I enjoyed this chapter-chapter 4-much more than the last. Better flow, imagery smoothly placed here and there. (My favorite was the boiler pipes) However, I do feel like the ending transition of Scheherazade's mood is a little abrupt, when her sympathetic horror suddenly links up with a mood change. But in a different perspective, it is natural for a prisoner to have emotional swings.

So far, so good. Seems like you've got the narration down. How will the two contrasting characters figure their roles out, when they are in opposite sides and, officially, in a rather unpleasant relationship?

Will be looking forward to the next chapter :)
schehrezade2005 chapter 4 . 2/7/2015
Years of Sunday School are coming back to me now...
ANYWAY.
It is interesting to hear some of Lina's stories - yes, it's another way for her to try to open up Scheherazade, but it also deepens her character and lets us get to know her a little better. I like the little bit of contrast you threw in about the Syndicate and Crescent Moon. Although we don't have a whole lot of information as readers yet about the opposing organization, it's not hard to imagine that perhaps the two sides of the conflict are alike in their training rituals to some extent. I think Lina's assertion about not truly understanding her enemy are completely correct. One will always know the enemy on some level, but knowledge of a foe extends so deeply that it's not ever really possible to completely study up on someone or something. Then again, if there was some sort of understanding between the groups, the conflicts would likely be much different.
Also, the bit with the redacted reports is absolutely hilarious. It's good to see some humor in the middle of a somewhat tense environment - not only does it lighten the mood a bit, it gives the characters a chance to show some of their wit.
Great chapter! I look forward to reading more. :-)
schehrezade2005 chapter 3 . 1/23/2015
Yay for getting questions answered! Side note: I think I read most of the books that were mentioned in this chapter and loved all of them - excellent taste in literature. :-)
It looks like Lina may actually get somewhere with our mystery prisoner, but I have a feeling that we are still a long way off from getting to the bottom of where Scheherazade is from and what her role is in the big picture. Course, we're still a little fuzzy on the Syndicate's motives as well, but I imagine these will become clearer as you post most chapters.
I am also curious about Kowalski and what sort of coping methods she has beyond what is described here. Clearly, some of these agents have a difficult past and some of them have been doing their job a lot longer and have seen more - it's interesting to note the different ways of dealing with the stress of the job.
Great job - keep going! I look forward to reading more.
albusnimbus chapter 3 . 1/22/2015
I sat and thought for a while, after reading the third chapter. It must be difficult to write in third person and continue the tension of the story. So far, this is good. Hope the sense of urgency comes more regularly, because there's where my blood tingles.

Stories are good-however, the people in charge won't be satisfied by merely stories of recovery, will they? Hoping for fresh news. More character build-up. (As I mentioned earlier, Kowalski is my favorite.) Perhaps Miss Kowalski will wake up in the middle of the night and start to remember past events. Perhaps she'll get into a fistfight pretty soon. Ah, hopes for action and combat. Not very ladylike but oh well.

(Pass aside the rantings of a passionate reader.)

How long are you planning this story to be? I'm guessing around twenty or thirty chapters?

I would like to get to know the characters on a more intimate level. It feels like they're still awkward acquaintances. For the intimacy and the reader-character connection to happen, their past and their viewpoints on certain things would have to come up. I'll trust you on that, JC. You're the storyteller and I'll be satisfied with what you write.

Overall, a chapter of respite and a moment to think about what will happen next. Something will be boiling, I'm sure. Keep going.
schehrezade2005 chapter 2 . 1/19/2015
Wow. Just wow.
I loved the line "People were so rarely who they appeared to be" and I have a feeling that will play out a lot more as the story goes on. It also says something to the reader about Lina's character and her desire not to be underestimated by her peers and the world around her. I have a feeling this will ring true for a number of the other characters as well, but I will have to keep reading to find out.
That last line. Guh. So brilliant. I'm sure Scheherazade will have many more tales to tell as we keep going, but they might not be the stories the Syndicate is interested in. For sure, she's captivated her captors in some form, but will the 'charm' last long enough for the Syndicate to get what they need or for her to escape?
Can't wait to read more!
albusnimbus chapter 2 . 1/10/2015
I'm wondering if they kill the captives after the interrogations-parallel to the title. Would Scheherazade lead the team on a false trail? I guess that if the storyteller is opening up, it's only to give them snippets that would lead them to a trap of some sort. Any chances of a breakthrough from the Crescent Moon?

Enough guessing. I liked how you picked up a different tone than the first chapter. Lina feels different, although Kowalski is still my favorite. I'm looking forward to see how the story weaves itself together, since you mentioned that there is a "truth" that will be uncovered as the relationship proceeds. Will be waiting for more :)
schehrezade2005 chapter 1 . 1/6/2015
Well.
I am thoroughly intrigued.
I like that you start by introducing the reader to Kowalski and start developing her character right off the bat. It seems like she has a sense of duty that conflicts with some of her morals, and I anticipate that this will be expanded upon as the story progresses. The world you've created and the initial conflict draw the reader in - is this a police state? Who is this girl and what role does she have to play?
It's only a chapter, but I like the intrigue and the mystery and I look forward to reading much more of it as it is posted. :-)
albusnimbus chapter 1 . 1/5/2015
Firstly, I really enjoyed reading this. The title caught my attention, and your writing style is very neat. There's a right combination of dialogue and details, enough to keep the tension, and the narrator's feelings came clearly. I'm curious about what organization the prisoner is involved in, why the main character is doing this job when she hates torturing people, and so on. I'll be waiting for more.