|Reviews for Mark|
| Vikki S chapter 6 . 6/25/2015
Thanks for the update, poor Mark - he can't seem to keep his tongue on a leash. I can't wait for Jamie to bring him down a few pegs.
| mandymoocha chapter 6 . 6/25/2015
I'm really disappointed!
I started reading this today and there's only 6 chapters :) I am really enjoying the story line .. I think you have given enough backstory to the characters to explain the conflicts going on and it's entertaining. With these kind of romance stories, there are always the standard cliches of storyline, but you are making it interesting and I'm looking forward to the next chapter (and just what exactly is in that report )
| Megsi chapter 1 . 6/19/2015
This is a really interesting story! I love that the main drive for it is a small town's prejudice against Jamie, mainly the Tate's, which she has been dealing with gracefully while trying to get the inn back up and running and keep her life (old and new) in order. I feel like you convey her frustration really well, I found myself having to breathe deeply too to calm my annoyance at some of the characters. Mark Tate is certainly an interesting character, I'm interested in what's made him so 'hard'. Obviously the private investigator did a very sub-par job, I'm not sure if there's something more to that or if they just sucked at their job. I also feel like there must be some big reason Fiona left the inn to Jamie, I feel like maybe she's her mother and had to give her up to her brother for some reason. Whatever the reason, she doesn't seem like a nice lady, in term's of her opinion of, and letter to, Jamie, so I'm interested in getting more of an account of her from Mark, who so obviously liked her and thought highly of her.
There are quite a few errors in the first chapter that made me a bit confused. The first being that you seem to have used 'her' in place of 'my', as below? Either that or you're referring Fiona's wallet but I don't think that's the case.
I'm going to get her wallet," he told her, lowering one arm slowly. "I'll give you her business card and license."
We have to get going. If you have any questions, feel free to give me a call, you have her card
Another thing is that you seem to slip between first and third pov, particularly towards the end of the chapter which made my reading of the story a bit confusing. For a bit there (the examples below) I thought that maybe there was another person present, besides Jamie and the two brothers, or fleetingly, that Jamie had a personality disorder and had started referring to herself as two people. I think the latter thought is a result of my tired state though!
As she did whenever someone gave me attitude, she shut down
For a second, she thought he actually snarled at me
I thought I should point out the slips in case you had maybe changed your mind on the pov halfway through writing and missed a few bits, or just slipped without realizing. First chapter was the worst for it, with a few pov slips in chapter 2. I don't think I noticed as much in the other chapters.
Good story so far otherwise!
| Vikki S chapter 4 . 6/14/2015
This is a very good story, If read these chapters as part of a Kindle sample I would outright purchase the book. Looking forward to more and more - and I have to say, the private investigate that Fiona hired was amateur at best, how could he not find out about Jamie's self reliance? And Fiona is coming off as a straight up b*tch; but it works for the story. Post more soon!