|Reviews for Mother, Must I? (Labyrinth June 2015)|
| Un-Ended Tales chapter 1 . 7/5/2015
Eerie and dark. Fitting of the Horror for Children genre. I see what you were trying to do with the ending, leaving the reader with all manner of possibilities for what happens next, none of them very good for our poor young Winifred. It does feel a little disjointed with the style of the rest of the story, but all in all very well written. I definitely felt a chill at the final phrase.
| augie.toaste chapter 1 . 6/29/2015
I like the deviation from your normal style. Like the others said, very Grimm. Poor Winifred. The two last lines, though it fits with the cadence you've built, don't make a lot of sense.
| Jun Aoi chapter 2 . 6/28/2015
Hey now, I did loved the original ending, however, this ending works too. Especially for what you are trying to do. I think that a nursery rhyme for children should have a lesson to teach. While it's easy to determine the moral of the tale by reading the story, this ending addresses it directly while giving the story a definite resolution. Personally, I think they both work rather well, and that it would be up to the writer to decide on which one to ultimately go with. I am a rather inexperienced writer, but as an experienced reader I love them both! _
| Solemn Coyote chapter 1 . 6/27/2015
This is great. Feels very Gaiman-y. Plain narration, not much of a swerve at the end, but it does an excellent job of slowly turning up the dial on the reader's dread. As far as pacing in horror goes, I think I've rarely seen Mother Must I's equal. Great execution, and I rather like the Gothic Germanic peasant vibe to the setting. I would not mind at all reading a collection set in the same universe.
| nullified-See-Hikitsune-Red chapter 1 . 6/27/2015
A phenomenal, dark, and gruesome tale that I'd say reads rather Grimm-esque. I feel, however, that the Grimm-like ending of a sort of pseudo-moral is missing. The story seems to just end without any sort of fable-styled closure.
All-in-all, however, a very enjoyable piece.
| TanteLiz chapter 1 . 6/25/2015
Very Brothers Grimm! The ending feels abrupt to me, in terms of the Bros. Grimm format - I want one of their wrap up statements (and so Winifred (blanked), and never (blanked) again...)
Great use of the prompt!
| LightningBolt21 chapter 1 . 6/24/2015
Are you sure that I didn't read a Grimm fairytale? This story was very well-written. It was simple enough without being ho-hum. I did find it a bit odd how Winifred killed her third brother, maybe because she obedient with the first two. This seems almost like a prelude for a story, like many of your short stories, I want there to be more.
P.S I was going to have peach cobbler for supper, but I think I'll pass.
| Jun Aoi chapter 1 . 5/31/2015
Nice! I especially love the way you did the ending. Great job, very Brothers Grimm indeed!
| T.D. Spearman chapter 1 . 5/30/2015
Riviting, a bit on tge gruesome side but once you start you can't stop reading.