Reviews for The Price of Beauty
Mislav chapter 1 . 4/13
Pretty disturbing and thought-provoking story. You captured the protagonist's state of mind and train of thought pretty well. His thoughts about his nurse were a good touch. I had no idea what direction the story was going to take. The climax really took me off guard, and it was sufficiently gory. That poor woman. Imagine waking up to that, if she even survived. Chilling. I like to think that Jacob was slowly driven insane by his obsession with perfection and symmetry, as well as unhealthy dedication to his profession and the pressure he was under, not to mention the envy that he felt. Keep up the great work. I always like reading your stories.
Virtuella chapter 1 . 11/8/2015
Well, that’s a new and unexpected way to go insane!

You have a real talent to take a topic and sharpen it to a vicious point in a very short space. I think it would be hard to come up with a more biting commentary on the beauty surgery industry.

I like how you’ve found space in this very short story for some philosophical-theological reflection. Being creative is one way of realising the imago dei, by being sub-creators as Tolkien would have put it, and Picasso could certainly make that claim. Using another person as your material, though, is treating a person as a thing and that is a major abomination.
Guest chapter 1 . 9/30/2015
Wow, you certainly have a knack for creating twisted tales. I like how you gradually revealed how truly psychotic the doctor was. At first I thought he was a just a pretentious, pompous a**, but when he started to contemplate performing surgery on his own face I knew this guy had some serious issues. The build up to the gory end was heartpounding. The last line was the best part because it was thought provoking. It is true that sheer perfection is unattainable. No scalpel, magic cream, or so- called youth rejuvenator will ever be enough to achieve it. Too bad the doctor had to mutilate his patient before realizing that fact. Another amazing story!
wisedec4u chapter 1 . 9/30/2015
Wow, you really have a knack for creating twisted tales. I like how you gradually revealed how psychotic Dr. Goldman really was. At first I thought he was just a pretentious, pompous a**, but when he began to contemplate performing surgery on his own face and on the face of the nurse, I knew something wasn't quite right with dear Dr. Goldman. You did a wonderful job with building up the tension to the gory end. The last line was the best. It was thought provoking and touch on more complex issue of vanity and unattainable beauty. It is true that no scalpel, miracle cream, exercise, diet fad, or so-called youth rejuvenator will ever be able to replace true inner beauty or sheer perfection (if perfection truly exist at all). Too bad Dr. Goldman had to mutilate his patient's face before figuring that out. Another amazing story!
so chapter 1 . 9/15/2015
Originally was going to review this for the RG. That really creeped me out, it was quite gruesome. I guess that was what you were going for though, so good job. The writing was good, just an idea that made me shudder
Cheddar-Graham chapter 1 . 8/10/2015
RG EF

The doctor starts out as rather show-offy with the hyperbole over his skills and also a bit pretentious, comparing his work to the masters. So I can't say that he is an inherently likeable character. However, I think the references to Gods and geniuses are indeed relevant given the ending.

I like how thought-provoking the piece is. You take us from the relatively straightforward questions of what is beauty apart from symmetry, and can anything man-made be considered beautiful to philosophical musings over inner and outer beauty. On the latter, it could be said that for all its terribleness, the doctor's consuming obsession over creating beauty has a strange kind of beauty in its purity.
Jalux chapter 1 . 8/10/2015
Man, like you don't feel like he's crazy at first but I love how gradually you reveal the madness lurking in the doctor and finally ending with the scene of him butchering his own patient. It creates a sense of tension throughout the piece that keeps you reading. So yeah I'd say the pacing is on point this piece, it just reads nicely. The idea of perfection was also quite interesting I suppose, what one defines as perfection is always going to be different from another? It's a simple idea but complex in itself too.
Ventracere chapter 1 . 7/24/2015
What a turn. I'm honestly a bit shocked - as is always at the end of your pieces. Anywho. Onwards!

As always, your pacing is impeccable. This piece has that slow lull to it in the beginning, and you let us ease into just who Goldman is. He's someone who loves perfection, who seeks and strives to unearth perfection in profession. It's something he can't achieve (which we find out at the end of the chapter), but he tries so hard to. This ends up speeding up to a rollercoaster end that no one can stop, not even Rachel. That had me speeding to the end, haha. Nice job.

Something else I liked was how you alluded to what Goldman was going to do as he studied Rachel's face. It's the barest of hints, but going through it again, I definitely liked how you gave us a heads up on Goldman's character. It gives him a depth that Rachel has, and emphasizes his intelligence. Even though Rachel is pretty, Goldman wants to take her under the knife and find out just /how/ pretty she can be. Again, perfection he can't reach. And that climaxes at the end when he digs into Nina's face in a fit - psychotic, perfectly characterized psychotic.

Last thing. Playing with names? Goldman? :D - I dunno where I was going with that.

Thanks for the read!
Kakikomi chapter 1 . 7/24/2015
RG
I LOVE this story because the pacing of it is immaculate and it's not overly gory.
I also love the characterisation of Dr Goldman, especially the use of the italics for his inner thoughts, and am impressed that this story is so strong even though it's only 1000-odd words.
alltheeagles chapter 1 . 7/23/2015
RG EF

I like the narrative. The clinical terms and impersonal tone of the narrative worked well as a contrast to the gory stuff. Apart from that the relatively slow start with all the philosophical stuff also build up a sense of tension that fits the plot in general.

I like how you sustain the theme of seeking perfection throughout until it's amped up to the max. The musings on great artists and genetic modification fit right into that. The only thing I'd suggest improving on is giving a trigger for him losing control at the end.
Scott Pilgrim chapter 1 . 7/23/2015
Ah. Man. That defo gave me goosebumps big time. You wouldn't think it, but edical malpractice is all too common in the world. But, I guess to Goldman, he was in the right, doing what he loved- creating perfection. Very well written.