|Reviews for Crescent Island|
| Jaya Avendel chapter 6 . 8/6/2018
The chapter of farewells. I liked seeing the sisters are they walked through the castle and met the people who will keep their home up and running while the famous five are away.
I liked it when Luna pronounced she had no qualms about leaving Renee with her keys. Knowing some quotes helps out, it seems. Lilou's eagerness and bubbly hugs as well as her nervousness were cute but I have a feeling she is really quite capable.
It was nice to meet the family before the sisters depart. Serene is feeling the worries about her family again. Each line about her sisters at the end was good and sound and descriptive with each of the girl's personalities.
Here is to hoping for a safe journey! Looking forward to Not A Boat.
| Jaya Avendel chapter 5 . 8/6/2018
Serene and her sisters getting dressed before moving out on the adventure gives them an air of confidence. Especially Fallena. She has to look right for adventuring. One cannot find the Angel's Gift in the wrong outfit.
I am curious about the Angel's Gift and looking forward to seeing what it is and what it possibly does. It seems not much is known about it.
Ah, and here we have some sibling jealousy. I like Fallena as she looked over her sisters and came to Serene. Serene being so like the mother she remembers must hurt. Fallena must have loved her mother with all her heart.
Looking forward to seeing Good Travels, and hopefully a closer bond between Fallena and Serene. As close as sisters get anyhow!
| RainbowPearls chapter 1 . 8/6/2018
What an awesome start, seriously!
I liked the way to gave brief introduction to the characters- Serene, grabbing my attention at quickest pace. She seems a little disinclined from competing this task and getting a hysteria if she'll be an exception. I hope she stays positive- after all, everything happens for a reading. ;)
That part was funny when she was going to the stage and she felt that people moved aside like that of Moses' s times. XD
Perry seems cute and friendly and his gestures were adorable. Nice friend Serene has got!
I look ahead how she attempts to complete her task unfalteringly, hopefully! :)
| Jaya Avendel chapter 4 . 8/2/2018
Luna and Serene. The way they come together is so amazing considering one is ice and the other fire.
Despite not liking some siblings, it is natural not to want to see them killed. And I understand how Serene would feel a little let down at not being trusted to carry out the mission on her own. Having her family there will make the adventure like one long, loud road-trip.
I loved seeing the elements be used for the first time in an actual fight. Luna has plenty of cold tricks up her sleeve, and the heavy block of ice did indeed sound painful. Learning from Luna to master her fire seems to be working, and Serene learns fast. If she keeps learning, she will throw out some serious fireballs!
Looking forward to the Key to Change, and the departure of the Crescents.
| Jaya Avendel chapter 3 . 8/2/2018
The way you described Serene's feelings as she went out to face the crowds was spot on. It felt like her fire was reacting to her tension and heating her up. I loved the cool game; she thought of a long list of increasingly cold things!
My first glimpse of Fallena and she does not seem so bad. But I suppose Serene was as surprised as me. I have a feeling the fact that the King was right there may have encouraged Fallena to be her nicest. A beautiful woman always likes a beautiful man.
The picture of the Crescent family came to life with each child, from earth to ice. And the ending was unexpected! I love the completely unpredictable plot twist! What a skillful twist you put in.
In fact, I am so curious, I am going to read the next chapter right now. Slight change to the plan indeed.
| Jaya Avendel chapter 2 . 7/31/2018
Because I have a large family, I connected so well with Serene's thoughts about her siblings. I loved how you popped in the bit about their elemental abilities with Serene's lighthearted voice behind it.
For a moment I thought Luna was the narcissistic sister mentioned in the first chapter but she seemed too nice! And, for someone with ice magic, she is pretty warm. Weaving the siblings' elements into their personalities is a nice touch.
Midnight's gift was so thoughtful and one, apparently, of the few Serene liked. Her alarms were going off for a moment over the pink crepe paper. One cannot leave one's sister without proper attire for her ceremony.
The picture of the bedroom and the moments leading up to the ceremony were well done with little effort. I can even see Robin with his mischievous smirk and feel Midnight's energy though you did not go into long descriptions of each character. That I like.
Looking forward to This Ceremony Thingie and enjoying it even more.
| Jaya Avendel chapter 1 . 7/30/2018
The feel of this chapter is amazing. Serene has a lighthearted, somewhat sarcastic voice that I like. You wove in her background in a very natural way brought her up to the ceremony smoothly. I am curious to see her in her quick state. It sounds like she can literally move like the wind.
I can picture the crowds well and Lady Oona is 'undeniably charismatic'. I was drawn to her immediately though Serene possesses certain compelling qualities of her own. The description you use presents a clear picture of the town.
The last lines of the chapter are poetic and rich with content. Serene knows leaving the island is not all a cake walk. She does not want to let down the legend of her family.
Looking forward to peeking into Bears and Dresses!
| Yakosh chapter 22 . 6/3/2018
Who's verity again?
| BradytheJust chapter 22 . 6/3/2018
No, forget about the family and the mission and just make out already! Ugh, Felix and Serene are starting to drive me nuts! :O
They are adorable and so sweet and they're holding hands! It's bloody adorable and I want more!
I did enjoy Felix's plan of following the follower, I'd never heard of that before so it was really interesting to see it in action, and huzzah they finally have a hold of one of the girls. Having her be a cherub is interesting, but does explain a lot. I want to see her use a bow though and make Felix and Serene fall in love!
| BradytheJust chapter 21 . 6/3/2018
Wow, you managed to take a tense situation and make it even worse! Why do small towns always have secrets?
I bet if they had taken the time to rename the 'mind squeal' to a mind caress, things would be easier on the people. As a hater of loud noise, someone squealing in my brain is very much something that would drive me into a homicidal rage!
And now Rhea's sister is back and has knocked Serene over the wall... she seems to do that a lot! And of course, she is gone again before anyone can stop her.
Here we go again! :)
| BradytheJust chapter 20 . 6/3/2018
A hairy parrot! :D
Alright, just so you know the rest of the chapter was the same spot on, fantastic, 10/10 stuff I've come to expect from you, now I shall gush about the spider!
AWWWWWWWWW! I just loved everything about that scene, from Serene's crazy idea to her chatting to it. "You carry my sister's life on your shoulders... no, I did not say you could sit on my shoulders!" Her dialogue and the way the beastie was described (disused mop head with legs) made it a cute friend for the time it was in the story.
I call for the spider to become a member of the quest! :D Maybe it could hide in Serene's bag and pop out to help at an inconvenient time. Hey, if Midnight's abilities go haywire again, external stimuli could work to snap her from it. Besides, just like in my novel, every female human needs a fuzzy friend right?
I'm pretty sure you owe me for something at this point, so why don't I collect and you make the spider a main character ;)
| BradytheJust chapter 19 . 6/3/2018
Okay, Zukafu, I happen to have 3 things I dislike in life:
1) Teleporters... they are so gosh darn annoying
2.) Drowning, ugh! Just no... If I have to die it won't be by sea!
3.) Raisins, especially in cookies, it just doesn't work.
Two of those dislikes were present in this chapter, and yet I still loved it! Fallena holding the water up to
the ceiling with her magic was awesome to visualize, Felix and Serene's adorableness was adorable, and Hyde's teleporting in and out perfectly added to the tension!
Now we have Rhea's twin, a girl who is strong enough to destroy walls and send three powerful foes running for the hills. I can't wait to see what happens next!
| Ckh chapter 1 . 1/5/2018
A pretty good start. I'm a fan of lightheartedish styles and you gotten that down.
| BradytheJust chapter 18 . 12/9/2017
I'm sorry that I didn't see this chapter back when it came out, but I've discussed it with my email and it should properly notify me of your chapters from now on.
Now, look Zukafu... I have written a ton of battle scenes in my day, but this chapter blows even my best fight scenes out of the water!
Everything from having a sprinkler ruin Serene's powers, to "The spear standing on its own without assistance" to her syncing with Felix was extremely well done! The descriptions, your word choice, and the touch of humor just made this less like a fight scene and more of an epic thing to visualize.
This chapter was nothing short of perfection! :D Keep it up!
| alltheeagles chapter 1 . 1/17/2017
I'm a fan of first person POV writing, and I like your 'voice' here, particularly how you slip in the background info (facts about guardians and how Serena can move fast) as part of the narration rather than a lecture-style exposition.
My burning question: Who is that woman in the window, and why is what she said accepted wholesale by everybody?