Reviews for My Murderous Parents
J.M. Black chapter 1 . 10/18/2015
This is incredible. Truly, truly incredible! The prose and creativity is astounding and flows so well together to prove to the world that magic does exist (in the form of writing).
It'd be interesting to play around with the sentence structure and formatting it more like a poem or something. If that never happens, though, it doesn't even matter because it's already great.

Please, keep writing!
Jack Bellows chapter 1 . 10/16/2015
I always enjoy myself when I pop by your profile and read your stories! This was another exciting piece with all the gore a guy could want. 3

As always, it was a pleasure to read and I look forward to more of this zany twist of yours! ;)
Cozwry chapter 1 . 10/11/2015
It's very scary, but I suppose that's what it's all about, isn't it? I didn't mind it! But, it reminded me of something old I read - like Shakespeare, or Homer, but I can't place it...
pastryninja chapter 1 . 10/11/2015
So even after they died, their skeletons still won't leave her alone. Creepy.

I wasn't expecting the rhymes, but I liked them. They made the story funnier, and added a playfulness to the macabre.
Lord Wezel chapter 1 . 10/11/2015
First off, this is so similar to a Dr. Suess story scheme! I don't know why... maybe it's the characters? Wink. The rhymes, though, work very well!

My impression of your 'parents' as I read. Oh, they sound like a nice, hard working couple. The sweet wife which cooks the meals. The gruff husband which bags and tags 'em. 'Em meaning stray people, of course! Mwahaha! Then, I'm like, oh goodness, they actually let guests inside and kill them as they eat. [Your descriptions of death by poison are... accurate... and the rhyme only adds to its... grandeur.] Them, I'm like, yep, they're the type to prey on stray people. I KNEW IT! And then, oh... they're skeletal ghouls which haunt her and keep her away from all contact until she finally dies... well, at least they're still a nice couple haha! The dynamic works well.

The man/wolf... my impression is that it was a werewolf or shapeshifter, or maybe a very greedy wolf (having two preys to eat). However, I notice that she mom fails to do his stitches well and dooms his fate. Intentional? Perhaps. And I'm curious to know if parts of him are, or are not, in the husbands pot! The marriage part? I'm unclear on that, sadly. I can't tell if it's meant in jest (based on my impressions of the rest of the story) or more serious in nature (in which I'm wrong in some areas)? The man dies either way, so...

The ending was unexpected. Oh, it helps explain a lot! Perhaps they kill her the only way the 'can' by killing anyone who gets near her? Or do they try to kill her occasionally also?

Finally, who is the real villain here? The narrator whom slayed their parents (for evil or justified reasons?)... or the sweet, lovable skeleton-couple silently working on their porch, smiling away, while the husband possibly stirs a wolf-man in their dinner pot?
Evelyn Baker chapter 1 . 10/10/2015
Dark, weird and entertaining. The rhyming gave it that extra kick.
Aske Nat chapter 1 . 10/9/2015
Utterly brilliant and very funny! It made me laugh so much that I'm still smiling. I'm really glad you didn't keep this to yourself; it was just what I needed today.
Jack Motley chapter 1 . 10/9/2015
REALLY dark and disturbing, zany, indeed. I like how it rhymed very much; made it much easier to read and digest.