|Reviews for The Eternal Song|
| Jaya Avendel chapter 1 . 7/13/2018
I loved the Eternal Song idea, and the creature was well done in the short eight hundred or so words you used. You brought across pain and love and happiness, as well as thought and emotions and the greediness of the ruler well.
The fantasy elements are clear, and I think the fable would fit well into a larger world. The Eternal Song is a beautifully written story.
| LostCriesofTime chapter 1 . 3/18/2016
Another awesome one shot story!
The description of her creature was great and the relationship between them that you described, considering this was so short a piece to build any kind of wholesome character development in, was so well done and when creature was taken away from the village, never to see girl again, it was so touching. I would have loved to hear more about this as there is so much here you could build and elaborate on, but maybe it is nicer in this short form as you get across the emotions and the heart of the story so well that it doesn't require any more to make it complete.
The realistic, non-fairy tale ending (as opposed to the creature being reunited with his girl) adds a quality to this story thats far more powerful than the cliche ending you could have opted for, which I think is brilliant. It reads like a fairy tale in how its short and full of heart, I'd just have loved to hear little bit more about creature's time healing the army and how he was with a blackened heart.
This was a lovely story all in all, I thoroughly enjoyed it!
| Jack Bellows chapter 1 . 1/9/2016
This needs to be longer! o: It would be a killer good novel!
That being said, It should come as no surprise to you when I say this was a pleasure to read.
| pastryninja chapter 1 . 10/31/2015
I could totally imagine this as an old fairy tale! I liked how the girl and the creature healed each other through song, and was sad when they were separated by the ruler. However, the ending cheered me up. Well done! As for criticism, there were some grammar mistakes, and I think this needs more commas in places.
Long live the Eternal Song! :)
| AngryFerrets chapter 1 . 10/26/2015
That is a pretty great synopsis! There is a novel waiting to be written around this, you have all the elements in place. I know you put this in as a stand alone feel good moment, and you succeeded wonderfully, but it just leaves me wanting more. More depth, more characterization, more story telling! It's like that first lick of your favourite summer ice cream, after a long, bitterly cold winter, during the first warm day of spring. By itself it melts on the tongue and tastes great...but of course you want the rest too! :)
| Jack Motley chapter 1 . 10/25/2015
What a great fairy tale, zany! I was enraptured from start to finish!
| Lord Wezel chapter 1 . 10/25/2015
An awesome story! Glad you shared it! I see the elements of fantasy... What an awesome frog-thing! Not to mention the kindness and compassion of the girl. All in all, I like it!