Reviews for A Day in the Life
Electra001 chapter 5 . 4/10/2016
Great story. You can do a lot with this story. You touched on Riley' s depression in the beginning, now she seems better. She' s adjusting well to a new school and her father' s absence. She has friends. Are you going back to that or is she better now?
I didn't like the stepdad acting like a dad. Riley has every right to be resentful.
It' s sad to see how the family still hasn't dealt with Riley' s dad suicide.
Are you writing this for a creative writing class?
J.Kuzzey chapter 5 . 4/9/2016
I really like that you're illustrating what she's going through by using her own artist talents as a outlet. This was the first time we saw any family interaction, and it was fairly sad to witness. I always hope for repairs in relationships, but it certainly seems as though that would be very improbable. Curious to see how you decide to develop this toxic family dynamic.
J.Kuzzey chapter 4 . 4/9/2016
"Step douche" and "step ass" had me laugh out loud. Well, here is the backstory I wanted! I can see how all of these things could really wear someone down. It was nice to have this all in one chapter instead of spreading it out too much, or not giving it enough time at all. Always good to get a look inside the lives of characters to better flesh them out for the reader. I enjoyed this chapter.
J.Kuzzey chapter 3 . 4/9/2016
Loved that you wrote a chapter where we can get a glimpse into her social life. Larry and Sam seem like legit people, and I'm glad that Riley has them. Nice job introducing them and giving us that peek into their backstory. It'll be interesting to see how their friendships affect her, and I'm curious to learn more about Riley's old friends and see if she ever lets Larry read her journal.
J.Kuzzey chapter 2 . 4/9/2016
Getting introduced to the character here is great. Now we know exactly who is narrating which will help us feel closer to her. You can really see how Riley is struggling throughout this introduction. "If only they could see inside my mind. If only they would just put themselves in my shoes for a minute and try to see things through my eyes. If only." I feel like this sums up what the main issue is surrounding things like depression. It's easy to brush it off if you're not dealing with it because it's not something people "physically" see like a broken bone. Stories like this can help bring it to the light, though.
That last line in this chapter is solid, I really loved it.
J.Kuzzey chapter 1 . 4/9/2016
Hm, I'm glad you used a first person POV for this. It really gets you inside what's happening. I've personally never suffered from depression, so reading this is giving me great insight of what it can be like. I hope as I continue to read I am able to continue to explore it. Learning about depression through someone else's eyes is a thing I believe more people should attempt so some of the judging can cease.