Reviews for Mythic Healing
AngryFerrets chapter 3 . 2/21/2017
Great chapter, good character development. Rayn's distrust in Esti's skills is very apparent. He comes across as a bit gruff in this chapter but that's actually a good thing. As a grizzled guard captain he would be naturally a little off put at carrying around an inexperienced apprentice. I love the descriptions of the healing. I've said before, a fantasy story from a healers point of view is very rare and I think you've done a great job of getting us "into her point of view". Not just because its written in first person but you've gone into great depth in showing the care and precision needed for a healer to be successful. There's no vague, "She waved a hand and drew out the infection". Instead it's a process that requires care, skill, and knowledge. It's great reading.

Now, as for the little perk at the end. I love a little bit of mystery that keeps pulling me back. Great stuff!
BradytheJust chapter 5 . 2/20/2017
"If lack of flavor were a crime, you'd be a murder instead of a healer..." I don't know why that made me happy, but it did :)

The imagery and word choice were wonderful as always, and I'm really concerned that this new curse hasn't been documented or even encountered before. It's odd something that powerful isn't known to healers, and that worries me a lot.

Now we've got a break in, possibly the same man who broke into the Guards house? I've dealt with wards before, and they are powerful... so who could break them?

Oh this just keeps getting better! Great job Lorrah and I need more! :D
WolfGoesBaa chapter 4 . 2/1/2017
I really like the mechanics of magic and healing and fighting. It shows it was well thought out... or at least thought about. And interactions between characters are interesting, even the ones that don't appear long like the carriage driver. Was that contempt for guardsmen I sensed. Ha ha, how tall is Keagan that Esti hugs his waist?

...he told [the] man, releasing his grip.

Hopefully chapter 5 is coming soon.
Bob Evans chapter 1 . 1/31/2017
You have a solid start here. The winning element is your First Person POV from Esti. She's got a specific voice that adds depth and color to the narrative. There's a lot about her that works well for the story you're telling—particularly her youthful aggressiveness. Love those kinds of characters.

Your use of magic is pretty excellent, too. The mechanics and descriptions give it a lot of dimension more generic magic typically lacks. A few more specifics on limitations will give it added tension when Esti needs to be clever in a tight situation.

Your prose is a bit bogged down with adjectives and descriptors. While it helps with the concrete imagery, it's a mouthful for a reader to swallow. Sentence length can help with that, but cutting out the fluff is the essential task. Tighter prose also helps set the pace and emotion of dramatic, active scenes. It felt a little sluggish at times when Esti was battling the curse. You want a faster pace there.

You've got a lot of solid parts in play. Keep the writing rolling!

~Bob Evans
Will9035 chapter 3 . 1/31/2017
A new, potentially undiscovered type of magic? Interesting way to get the story rolling.

I liked your description throughout the chapter; it was pretty visceral and easy to imagine, especially when you used colors to describe the wounds and the parts of the body that it was affecting. (Yeesh.) My one recommendation would be to break up some sentences a little bit more. Some, like "He pulled himself to his knees and I half-rolled off of him, dropping the torch as I struggled to prevent the movement from twisting my shoulder as he refused to let me go," is a bit much to digest in one fell swoop.
She Who Loves Pineapples II chapter 4 . 1/30/2017
This is really interesting so far. The dialogue is great; I can hear everyone's voices in my head. And the way you write the healing scenes is so interesting. Most authors don't really write about how Magic feels when you're using it. Looking forward to more.
AngryFerrets chapter 2 . 1/18/2017
Another hugely satisfying instalment!

I really enjoyed the first version of this story but the way you have rewritten it is outstanding. A few minor typos here and there but nothing that wouldn't get picked up through a thorough line edit.

There is a different 'edge' to this story. To the common way of speaking from Samuel and Jasper to the description of the foul part of town there is a marked difference from the original take. It's grittier and feels more like a fantasy novel than how the original began. You given a lot more depth to the characters right from the beginning and drawn me in more than the original. Looking forward to more!
alltheeagles chapter 4 . 1/15/2017
Wow, this is some ride, from the excitement of fighting the curse to the tension with Jak
and finally the light teasing. :) It was a cool ride through all the emotions that I found rather cathartic. I particularly liked the description of the curse as something almost living
and seemingly with a mind of its own. It makes me think of all kinds of possibilities as to what it might be and how it led to the building collapsing. Possession? Or something even more sinister? The plot twists nicely...

Typos: gravelLy, not to allow... (something?) in our building
BradytheJust chapter 4 . 1/3/2017
That last paragraph with the hug was wonderful! Yay hugs! :D

I also love the little romance between Rose and Rayn and Kegaan and the midwife. So cute! :)

The battle with the curse was very interesting and I liked how Esti used some trickery and spikes to handle a different style of curse. It just shows how smart she is, and the building collapsing was very scary, my heart stopped a few times!

Amazing job as always!
AngryFerrets chapter 1 . 12/12/2016
A most impressive opening chapter. I admit fully that when I started reading I was expecting simply a more polished and revisionist copy of the previous version. What a great time to be wrong.

The story is much more powerful from this angle. The reversal of roles for Esti from master to apprentice is a much better angle. The first person POV is a perfect choice for showing her fear, lack of confidence and eventually her determination as she perseveres. It shows a lot of her character and instantly lets the reader bond with her, and cheer her on, as she struggles with the curse. It is a fast paced, exciting opening that instantly has you on edge.

I'm really excited to see what other changes are in store moving forward. Outstanding work!

FWIW: Noticed a few small typos...a couple of times "my" was used where it should have been "me". I forgot to note them as I was reading, (one was "tentacles stretched towards my") but it's small stuff that you'd catch on a thorough reread.
WolfGoesBaa chapter 3 . 12/6/2016
I like the interactions with Jasper. From the good cop bad cop interrogation with him in the previous chapter to the healing part at the beginning of this chapter. I also like how healing is a complex thing in this world. Like I said, its not as easy and simple as putting your hands on the ailing and magically taking away their illness. It comes with its own risks, which makes it more interesting and suspenseful (is that even a real word) when Esti attempts to heal someone.

I'm interested to see how our 3 heroes interact with each other, what with Rose's protective nature, Esti's moments of self-doubt and Rayn's... Rayniness (?).

Waiting for the next!
alltheeagles chapter 3 . 12/1/2016
Great chapter. The tension stretched and relaxed and then went taut again, like the string of a musical instrument. I really liked the way you describe magic - it was believable the way it made something abstract 'visible' but it wasn't OTT in that it wasn't the kamekameha kind of release of power, cause power is nothing without control, to borrow that advertising catchphrase. Once again, you ended on a cliffhanger, leaving us wanting more. :)
Will9035 chapter 2 . 11/28/2016
I really like the description you had here, especially the street corner and the vivid imagery of Jasper's wounds towards the end. (Luckily, I didn't have anything in my mouth *this* time while I was reading about things like yellow pus)

The one thing I would advise you on is to be careful with proofreading; I saw a couple of typos, and they happened in pretty close proximity to each other, so I got the impressions parts of this chapter were either rushed or not as proof-read as some of the other parts. Just something to watch out for!

That said, I'm wondering why Jasper didn't immediately want to say something about the sorcerer until he was bribed with treatment. He doesn't strike me as the kind of guy who'd be in league with someone capable of casting a horrible curse...maybe he's scared of what will happen if he squeals?
BradytheJust chapter 3 . 11/22/2016
Okay, first of all, I loved the descriptions of the healing with Jasper and the unconscious man. They were descriptive, easy to visualize, and they reminded me why I don't watch medical dramas...

The tension of the raid was also well done, with Rayn kicking down a door in full epic style! :D Although, a lesson was learned... be on your guard, even with a corpse in the room!

Now I can't wait to see what that new magic was... can't wait! Amazing job LorrahBear! :D
Will9035 chapter 1 . 11/17/2016
Well, for starters, thank you for making me regret the fact that I was enjoying a hot drink as I read the first paragraph!

All kidding aside, this was a pretty solid chapter. Admittedly I'm not a fan of magic/fantasy, so I'm not sure how reliable my feedback on the basic plot and character structures.

I will say that your description was great. Most of the time you were describing the curse or Esti's reaction to destroying it, I could very vividly picture the scene. The one thing I'll say, though, is that there might have been a bit *too much* description. At the beginning and at the end it wasn't a problem, but during the main body of the story when Esti was trying to destroy the incrediamentem, the description slowed down what should have been a very frantic and intense scene. But, like I said, I found the description quite good all the way through, so that's only a minor complaint.

I'm wondering why Keagan didn't seem to be taking more of an active role in helping Esti to destroy the curse. Even if this was just a test, it still seemed like there would be some serious consequences if Esti didn't succeed. Of course, since Esti actually *did* succeed, I suppose it's entirely possible that Keagan at least intended on intervening if he had to, but the situation never arose.

All in all, a good start with vivid description and the always-classic action scene to open things up. Nice job.
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