|Reviews for Once A Bird Sang|
| Marina x Machina chapter 6 . 5/22
I would tweak a line to say "I know, it's painful, but the rewards are worth earning."
Otherwise, I really like the message of this overall poem. It starts off with the handsome prince - I really like the over-the-top-ness of the line "Oh, the girl was in love! Beautiful, glorious love."
But more importantly, I love the lines "Choosing instead to try escaping from life, so they jerked her out of the dream," "There are moren things to look for, other forms of beauty among mankind," as well as "And when she arrived, gratefully, she knew her new home would be last."
| Marina x Machina chapter 5 . 1/26
This is probably one of your best pieces...though it is a little disheartening. The near rhyme prevents redundancy and the laments feel real.
But I love the last line, how it unexpectedly rhymes with the one before it and almost restores a sense of order. Like saying it's going to be okay.
| Marina x Machina chapter 4 . 1/26
I think your writing is starting to mature. The phrases are beginning to ring more clearly and the flow has improved a lot.
Having said that, I feel like the rhymes feel somewhat redundant ("earth" and "worth" or "world" and "hurled," but that's more of a personal preference), but I think you're getting much better.
I haven't posted a Baby Blue chapter about it or talked about it with people outside of my IRL friends, but I also had a similar incident when I found out that one of my friends actually really doesn't like me. It was pretty upsetting to me and I got mad at myself and was really frustrated, scrutinizing all of our interactions in an attempt to see when and why. I get that similar feeling from this piece.
I hope you are feeling better and that you find the kinds of people who will actually and truly support you. I hope that writing this also helped.
| Marina x Machina chapter 3 . 1/26
I know I already reviewed this, but again, I really do like the flow and structure. It doesn't feel redundant, and certain verses are very eloquent.
| Marina x Machina chapter 1 . 1/26
I don't really see letters in color, but I do associate certain personalities with letters or numbers (like, 6 is mad at 7 for cheating on it with 8, who is a major ho). I don't know why. Maybe it's a writer thing, though?
| WafflesandUnicorn chapter 3 . 12/30/2017
Honestly, I don't know much about poetry, I couldn't write a poem if I tried, and I rarely understand poetry. Despite that, I can appreciate some. I like these, but unlike you, I prefer this one (Ignorant Denial, I believe it's called), over The Last Day. I couldn't tell you why, but I just do.
| WafflesandUnicorn chapter 1 . 12/30/2017
You said something about a unicorn, which pleases me. Not gonna lie though, I didn't understand it. I liked it, but I didn't understand it.
| Seudonimo Voldeminty chapter 3 . 11/21/2017
Nice poems, I enjoyed them.
| Marina x Machina chapter 2 . 11/13/2017
RhymeZone is my go-to when you can't find the right word.