|Reviews for Story Arcs|
| mary.okeeffe.16 chapter 1 . 2/9/2019
An early Christmas story
| Ckh chapter 2 . 6/21/2018
*Doesn't wave hand because I just randomly throw in names and don't know how to use random number generator sites. Now, I do think that you did a fantastic job in portraying Aria's character. She is a bit naive (though not unbearably so) but she recognizes and is able to accept the cruelty of the world she inhabits despite being so sympathetic. She left a good impression on me, and I would like to see how she develops during the run of the story.
The writing has this somber quality to it, fitting for your rough world. A solid chapter all around.
I consulted the RNG gods and they told me Aria was 98. Hey, blame the RNG gods.
| Ckh chapter 1 . 12/17/2017
I don't celebrate Christmas. Do I not exist? Eh, always had that sneaking suspicion anyways. Or maybe I'm Asian.
About this story, its cute, I guess? No really, its [Dictionary word for cute here]. The entire setup for this oneshot is very fitting. MC helps boyfriend finds resolution during christmas(?). That's great oneshot/epilogue material, no lie.
When people read epilogues, they expect to find resolution in themselves through resolution of the characters and you definitely achieved that here. The execution is great. I really like the dynamic between Fisher and Meg. Their lines are believable and they contrast each other well.
In all honestly, this reads perfectly like a finale of sorts and despite not having knowledge of the original story, I feel satisfied. You evoked an emotional reaction from your reader. This is the type of epilogue that feels pleasing to me and I think this epilogue would please future fans as well.
| Sir Scott chapter 1 . 12/5/2017
Good story. I like how they enjoyed the bread together. Fisher must have had a pretty tough life, he seems so broken. You did a great job capturing that with this story. Merry Christmas.
| Barbados chapter 1 . 12/5/2017
You titled your story... after a verse... that you hate? A verse... in a Christmas song... in a story not taking place during Christmas? Interesting choice. So what used to be Story Arc 1 is now this? And Story Arc 1 is... gone?
So, one thing that drives me crazy in stories is the use of parenthesis. Especially when whatever is in them could just be said inside the story. This seems to be a thing people writing in first person do a lot, and I can't quite figure out why. Can you enlighten me?
It's clear there's some history here, and it sounds like it may be related to some other story you've put up somewhere. I think you did a great job of pulling it through without going into it. The history is shaping the moment, but the story is firmly grounded in the moment, and that can be a tricky thing to do.
There are some great lines that really pain their relationship, such as "yet he trusts me." You can feel her frustration with trying to break him out of his solitary shell - as if she just wants to smash through the wall of it, but trying to help ease him out of it instead.
I might have liked a little more of the scene pulled through earlier on. All we really get is the dust of the street and the heat. Sounds? Smells? Big city? Small town? Season? There's a hint of Xmas here, but with the heat references, not sure about that?
It was very well composed. Good flow, good words, good style. Not the genre I usually go for, but sometimes that's best. Life begins at the edge of your comfort zone, ad Fisher may soon be discovering. :)