|Reviews for The Keeper Games|
| Jae Hwa chapter 1 . 1/24
I’ve been meaning to read this story for a while now! Glad I got around to it. Elryn sounds like a girl’s name, but it doesn’t really matter. Right off the bat, I found Lilith to be a walking contradiction. One minute she’s apologetic and crying, and the next she’s pissed at something Elryn said. Hmm. Also, she has a sweet tooth, but can tolerate coffee? That’s unlikely, but I guess to each their own.
Also, you might need to work on your descriptions. You were throwing out character descriptions left and right that none stuck with me. But you did well in giving each character a specific attribute that stuck with me, eg. Elryn is level-headed, Roy is arrogant and Lilth is... a walking contradiction. In terms of grammar, you’re spot on, your sentences aren’t too choppy (which is a huge issue, believe me or not) and there aren’t much typos. Good job.
I actually really enjoy stories like these, so keep it up!
| naveenkagtk chapter 1 . 1/19