|Reviews for Welcome Home, Annabeth Tracy|
| alexhu chapter 1 . 3/7
1. This is not a negative review, but a review that I hope will be helpful to you.
2. Please don’t take offense to any of my comments or constructive criticism. If you want to chat further about my opinions you are free to PM me if you’d like more dialogue about it.
Okay so to the actual review. This was a really rough read for me.
There were a lot of misspelled words and grammar errors. The primary one that made this difficult to read was that there were no breaks for speech anywhere. It was all mushed into one, very large, paragraph.
I’m also wondering if the names/titles are extremely important. It seems kind of redundant to me to list all of their names in sequence like that. I understand that some families do not all share last names, but most of the time that is the case and is usually only noted when it’s NOT the case. Just my personal thoughts on that.
I also think that the story could have used more descriptive language. For instance, instead of saying “nightmares/visions” you could have said “night terrors”.
For the positives, I do think that you’ve got a strong, interesting plot. With a little work and clean-up, I think this will turn into a great story.
Good luck, and don’t give up! You’ve got this!