|Reviews for A Small-Town Vendetta|
| echogirlcapri chapter 1 . 6/22/2019
I know nothing about football, but that opening really made it vivid for me. I love the details where Mike is sizing up his opposing quarterback, since that slowing down and noticing is something I wouldn't really expect from an action scene.
I'm interested to see the way that Mike and Katherine interact in coming chapters. The way that Mike assessed Katherine's body felt a bit objectifying to me, and it made me like him a little less, but that might just be my perception of the scene. I'm curious about where this will go next!
| She Who Loves Pineapples II chapter 7 . 5/26/2019
[ I love you from the bottom of both my heart and my vag]
Anyway, it was an interesting read with a protagonist who subtly becomes the villain. However, it would be easier to get into the story if it was more fleshed out and longer. The crazy stuff in the story is less plausible the less detail there is. So more detail would work wonders. :)
Nice story. And BTW, thanks for all the reviews on Tidbits!
| She Who Loves Pineapples II chapter 6 . 5/25/2019
Lewis is an interesting character. The various odd things about him, like that he named his son “Second” and went out of his way to draw in your MC specifically add to the atmosphere. I must say it seems weird that he could dig himself out of his parents’ debt in 2 weeks that was so bad they killed themselves over it.
| She Who Loves Pineapples II chapter 4 . 5/23/2019
If he’s autistic it would be cool to see more of his autistic traits. Panic attacks aren’t really an autistic trait (like of course there are plenty of autistic people that have them but usually just if they have anxiety disorders too, not only autism.)
Anyway what shitty parents to kill themselves and leave their son to dig himself out of the hole they caused.
| She Who Loves Pineapples II chapter 3 . 5/22/2019
Even though it’s a short story, I like how you include details that characterize the characters. Like, she’s so accepting of his familial situation because hers is also unusual and something people might judge.
| She Who Loves Pineapples II chapter 2 . 5/22/2019
Hmm, I like how the parents have something unique about them. The orphanage thing seems weird though. They’re not really around in the US anymore.
| She Who Loves Pineapples II chapter 1 . 5/21/2019
Your beginning is nice and ominous. Him saying “nice to meet you too” as he’s being wheeled away makes it seem more like a rom-com than a thriller tho. I’d pick a different place to end the chapter if I were you. :) though it was funny!
| Morrowseer chapter 1 . 4/19/2019
As far as I’m concerned, you do seem to have the stuff to become a published author. This chapter seem like one out of a book from a library. However, getting a book published is even harder than writing one. It’s more about the people you know rather than how good your work is. I’ve noticed you have a copyright sign at the end of your summery. Did you really buy a copyright for this?