Reviews for Eden Virus
LDF chapter 1 . 3/19
[CRACK
I let out a cry of pain as I landed hard on the pavements. Something...I felt something break.]

You really don't need the 'crack' there. This isn't a comic book. The second sentence is fine on its own.

[Without even time to react I was immediately pinned down, unable to move as a monster pounced on top of me.]

It pounced on top of her again?

For someone who is being eaten alive by monsters, the narrator is incredibly lucid and able to hold a conversation.