|Reviews for W-ARC-L I: Legend of the Elemental Wars|
| SNSPIDEY chapter 1 . 6/7
Hi, nice chapter!
Before I get anywhere into the story, just on a writing stylistic critique, why do you phrase a sentence like this:
"Houston remarked, as Azel looked out the window..."
When a character speaks, why put a comma and then say something else? Is that "legal" so to speak, when it comes to writing? I'm completely fine with it, I'm just wondering why you structure your sentences like that.
In terms of actual story, I like what I'm seeing so far. The Element nations remind me of the Last Airbender, but it's definitely an original exposition you've managed to set up for this world. Keep up the good work!