Holy crap, this is messed up. o.O Brilliant.

My gosh. It's impossible to describe how I feel about this story. It's filled with anguish and torment, a dead end - yet I love it. You've done an amazing job on spinning a new twist on a child's tale.

Psh, and I thought that Jack and Jill were just clumsy.

omg that was amazing! so creative and dark i loved it!

just the blurb alone for the story caught my eye, made me laugh, and made me want to read it. Ahaha, where do you get your creativity from?

WOWWOWWOWWOWWOW

Amazing.

*Author favorited*

I like it...

Unfortunately I am a romantic and would have much preferred a happy ending, but of course this would not fit.

I don't unerstand this- 'Not too many mourned Jill, being the devil's bride as she was. No one mourned save her brother and mother, with the exception of the placing a single red rose into her coffin by Sylvia, and an apology; Jill was a far lovelier rose than Sylvia would ever be.'

Does this mean Sylvia put a rose into her coffin and said Jill was better than her?

I came across your Fiction Press profile while searching google at around 11 pm and decided to read your interpretation of "Jack and Jill." I am very glad that I did. Your story is very well written and captivating, and I couldn't go to bed without finishing it. Despite the well known ending of the nursery rhyme, your story still inspired numerous predictions of how it would end.

In addition to the fascinating plot, I really enjoyed the characterization. You did an especially good job with Jill, who I really felt for and sympathized with.

I also loved how you had a well developed theme, something which I don't usually expect to find from amateur writers (pardon my presumptiousness in assuming you to be an amateur, which you may not be).

Overall, there were very few flaws in the story itself. I did notice a number of typos, although this did not take away from the overall quality of the work. [Those who are reading this review and have not read the story should skip to the next paragraph.] I also thought that the sex scene was a little bit generic. Besides that, though, I can't think of any other flaws worth noting.

Overall, your story is very well written and you illustrate highly impressive writing skills. Reading this was definately worth a great deal more than the sleep that I put off.

hi !

Cheap retail shoes watch, sunglasses, belt, hats/caps, High quality T-shirts,

ED hardy t-shirts,ED Hardy hoodies,ED hardy ,Jeans,GUCCI shoes,LV Handbag,Chanel

Handbag…high quality,low to

absolutely loved how this story connected to the rhyme. though i had hoped that they would have had a happy ending... but never mind. I especially like this part: "No. Jill, I'm so conceited I can't see straight in front of me," he said with a nervous laugh. "The only person I really care about more than myself…is you." awesome writing :D

Discount Nike Air Max 2005 Shop ( )

Discount Nike Air Max 2006 Shoes Shop ( )

Discount Nike Air Max 360 Catalogs ( )

Discount Nike Air Max Ltd Shoes Catalogs ( )

Discount Nike Air Max Tn Men's Shoes ( )

Discount Nike Air Max Tn 2 Women's Shoes ( )

Discount Nike Air Max Tn 3 Customize ( )

Discount Nike Air Max Tn 4 Shoes Customize

( )

I've just read this whole story in one sitting because it's so captivating! It's a remarkable piece and I absolutely adore it! Great job!

Tina

This is simply an amazing story. It has been a long time since I read something that could move me to the verge of tears. I loved every word.

All nursery rhymes seem to have darker, deeper meanings and I have always wondered what could have resulted in the Jack and Jill tale and you certainly captured the essence of it.

You have a beautiful writing style and I plan to read more, particularly your other twisted fairytales.

~Jax C.

Wow! This was an awesome story! I like your writing style.

Amazing. Truly amazing. It is so beautifully written, and not to mention clever too. The way you tied in the nursery rhyme... It was simply... Wow. Not even words can describe how spectacular it is.