Reviews for Double Vision
Meph chapter 2 . 5/3/2002
Hi! I love this! And thanks for being very nice with your reviews of Rompingham. There will be more! :P
Ruby-Kate Gamgee chapter 2 . 5/2/2002
i love this! i wanna see more! and thanks for your lovely reviews about my stories :) i've put a new chapter up of rompingham by the way :) I'd email you but your email address isn't on your profile... wanna email me?
ohnoes chapter 1 . 4/10/2002
me likes a lot. it's a good original plot. *claps*
Omni1 chapter 1 . 2/28/2002
P.S.- I have some more poetry and random synaptic misfirings on my sight, care to review?
nova2 chapter 1 . 2/28/2002
In light of what Omni said, I would like to make it clear that this is NOT a finished work as of chapter two. Sorry for any confusion or disapointment at the undeniably dangling plot lines! Never fear, more to come!
Omni1 chapter 2 . 2/28/2002
Ah ha. This will not be a sugary, euphemistic review, what it entails will depend upon what is in store for the story, but keep in mind, I am talking to a thirteen-year old. If in fact, you intend upon relying solely upon the shock value of the coincidence to close the tale, then this review firmly denies that you have lived up to your potential. You may, without infringing upon past inspiration, elaborate your story as far as you see fit. If on the other hand, this represents only the beginning of a larger script, then by all means it is a good start, the plot has been nicely developed and it is ripe for interesting conflictions and dialogue. If you wish to leave it as is, then I suggest that you "fatten it up" a bit more. Add more details, more about the past (which was a little vague), and work the characters a bit more. Help us to feel the shock of what's happened, and what it would mean to the girl. Let us see more emotion, more visceral feelings and encounters. Other than that, I see a good plot, and especially considering that you "are" only "thirteen" after all. That's my view on the subject. Good work.