good story, good story. Great dramam and tension between the two characters. I feel bad for Keln though, he seemed like a nice guy but maurie was also right to just leave. please continue!

Brilliant. Excellent. Superb.
Get the formatting problems around the middle fixed. Then write more. Please, please, write more.

will there be more soon? :)

Man, that was a heck of a piece...

I especially loved the fencing between Keln and Maurie...

Your piece seems to be a one-shot... *gets down on her knees* PLEASE SAY IT ISN'T SO!

I enjoyed reading this piece very much. It has a layer of realism to it that is dramatic and still believable...and as it seems to be stand-alone, well, I wish there were more, but then if there were more, it might ruin what's right here...its open-endedness is what lends it such a thoughtful air.

oh sh**. oh sh**.

that was brilliant. to say that the dialog was the wittiest i've read in here or that the characters were just so real is not enough. i think i'll be traumatized for weeks.

Oh wow! That hurts just to read. I sincerely hope there's more! You've done such a wonderful job showing all the powerful emotions in the piece. I particularly love how I completely empathize with both of them. You've perfectly balanced each character's weaknesses with his/her strength. Wow. Great job!

Happy Writing!

ey CLymene! I really like this! Your characters are so well-drawn and realistic. Really impressive writing...now, is it a one-shot or a series?

Excellent story! A very creative piece.