Really cool! Add more! Add more!

Wow. Again, you are wonderful at capturing the tone of an ancient myth or legend. Very dark and foreboding. Please write more!

Hey thats a very interesting begining. please continue this, is great, i cant wait for more!

i'm completely creeped out...but it's good. is there more to this?

it's sort of confusing going between the italics and the regular font-i'm not sure what's going on exactly. is Yorin just putting his two-cents in, or is he telling the story, or are the events happening as he "dreams" them?