|Reviews for Rachmaninoff's Prelude in G Minor|
| Nails For Your Crucifix chapter 1 . 10/9/2003
Yes sestinas are very difficult. Believe me, I've tired before. But this wasn't bad. My only point is that it's supposed to be 10 syllables per line. Other than that, keep writing.
| Amaris chapter 1 . 2/23/2003
seem complicated. You're limited to those six words; I think you did a good job though. "Meant" seems to be the hardest word to use out of your six. I like how you used the dove, especially where you say that "the dove has gone, leaving guesses as to what its song had meant." Although we all know what it symbolizes, it's a bit mysterious.
| peachykeen chapter 1 . 12/27/2002
I don't know what you're talking about, lady. I have no idea what the form was supposed to be, but I love the content. Love, not like, love.
1st stanza: this is a really nice opening - it jumps right in and hooks the reader
2nd stanza: what's weeping,and why? I feel like it's about the chaos, but I don't understand why it's weeping
3rd stanza: nice connection to the 1st stanza - connecting the whole family, and showing that the son wants to follow his father, and doesn't like the certainty of life with his mother
4th stanza: I think this is my favorite part. The picture in my head is great. Are the last 2 lines saying that he understands what he's doing, but the rest of the army doesn't?
5th stanza: hmm, the "Hark" is a little sudden, it really freaked me out the first time. "muddy certainty" - do I sense an oxymoron? alchemy sounds familiar, but I don't remember what it means
6th stanza: ahh! I'm so torn between this stanza and the 4th! I really can't choose between the two. Anyway, I like the metaphores (shedding the feathers of certainty) - this part is really powerful
7th stanza: This is a nice way to wrap it all up. I feel like you could have improved this part, but it's a good start.
overall: Your choice of words will definitely help you in the future. As for now, I find this one very enjoyable. Tres bien!
| De Miles Justus chapter 1 . 9/1/2002
Well, even though that poor Rachmaninoff used to groan about how much people obsessed over prelude in G minor, I think he would have appriciated your piece. Original. Don't bash yourself because of what you write. That lack of self esteem can be a turnoff to potential readers. Let readers make the criticisms.
Hey, could you maybe review some of my work?
| Aviendha19 chapter 1 . 6/4/2002
ah, i love that piece! rachmaninov is so great. almost as great as tchaikovsky. i mean, 2nd piano concerto! words are dumb, but Full moon and empty arms was not a bad way to lyricize it. ugh, stupid modern society and their need for lyrics
anyways. about the poem. it had nothing to do with the prelude, though u titled it that. well, other than that it was good.
| the Queen of Jupiter chapter 1 . 5/30/2002
That's one complicated poem style...*shudders* I'd never be able to pull it off. But you did perfectly, without sounding forced at all! *wanders off, muttering about sestinas* :)
| SylviJove chapter 1 . 5/28/2002
Hey Emerald. Hey don't worry... that stuff sounds HARD. I mean I couldn't have done it for TWO whachamacallits Crazy stuff. Whoever invented it is a loser. If the loser is still alive and is reading this.. MY APOLOGIES!
Haha aight girl... you wrote something about the army. I approve. I really like the dove stuff. It's pretty. And it didn't get killed. I enjoyed it in full.
| O bakecha iyan chapter 1 . 5/27/2002
The above means"Oh, I don't want you to deceive your appearance!" or something like that. Yeah, it's really embarressing if you say it to the Japanese public.
Nihi. I like these kind of poems also, and sestina sure is hard to do. Chaos, meant, certainty, way, army, gone. I wonder how many people will be able to do what you did. Me liked the last three stanzas the most. Dove, dove. It's like, chaos - peace - chaos - peace. well, I'll be having fun reading your next sestina!
| Mike chapter 1 . 5/25/2002
I'm playing Rachmaninov's prelude in G minor! My perception of the song is a bit different from yours, I suppose, but I think its a well written poem. Uhh... I have nothing much to say (as always), except that the poem is more like 2 parts whereas the pieces is more like 3 parts.
| Phoenix Debonaire chapter 1 . 5/25/2002
It's neat! *in direct defiance of the huge and weighty review next to me*
| A.J.Peart chapter 1 . 5/25/2002
Innocence to experience. What more can be said about it? Let me see; I'm sure I can rustle something out of this bag of nonsensical bull that I carry around with me.
To begin with, you've got the embarkation on a journey. If I could remember the name of that circle thing, I'd use it, but I can't remember it. I think I've heard the name twice since grade nine, but the concept is sort of grilled in by virtually everything writen: movies, books, poetry, plays, operas, etc. The journey starts where there is only innocence. Then there are challenges that are faced to bring the journeyer closer to him/herself and closer to the brink of existance. Then they return home, to the beginning of the circle, where they are a different person, having gained the experience. (See, my bag is working already.)
Okay, now that I've ranted about that, let's see if I can find a way to apply it here. The son is the journeyman in the poem, heading off to join the army. I think, in many ways, the millitary is a major "growing" experience, where you find out just who you really are and where you stand in the world. Now, because the kid dreamt of the army, and all this stuff about the father and the various people and things that disappear, the army itself becomes the boy...though drawn out the other way. Really, it's still the boy doing this stuff, but it's shown as the army. But if you think of an army, you see this huge mass of people marching as a whole across a wide stretch of land. This, though, treats the army as something more individual, as it encounters the dove and appreciates its beauty and peacefulness. The army could tehm symbolize the war that goes on inside each and every one of us as we grow from childhood to adolescence and then adulthood.
So, now with all that bag-stuff, it can be seen that the dove itself is the experience. See, the dove disappears, but at the same time it's still there. This shows that the dove is the physical embodiment of wisdom, and since you've never specified where the dove went, just that it was gone, it could be interpreted as though the dove was absorbed into the boy. Even after wisdom is gained, there are always questions. The wisdom part of that is being able to see the questions, since you can't answer a question that's not there. Then, the dove protects the "army" from chaos, meaning that the experience has left the boy wise enough to avoid the dangers of life.
Something like that.
How's that for pulling bull out of my "useless knowledge and pointless banter bag"? I'm quite good at that, I think. Anyway, despite teh awkwardness of the style, which wasn't done that badly (you wont find me trying this anytime soon, rhyming is hard enough), it's still a good poem. I managed to rant for a good half an hour on it, so it's got to be good. There's probably a number of typos and spelling mistakes in here too from typing too fast, but I'm too lazzy to chekc..
Okay, I'm done for now, talk to you later.