Did I deserve this?

What did I do?


A word I thought I'd never hear.

You couldn't stay

When I was leaning on you.

Just let me fall

Leave me helpless on the ground.

Reorganize my life

Just when I has a grasp on it.

Was it just too much for you?

Why'd you keep it bottled in?

Were you afraid you'd knock me off my feet?

Your blood lies on the floor

It's contrast with the white tile

Creates and eerie sight.

The letters you wrote sit on the table

The names of who they belong to

In your neatest handwriting

Across the front.

There's one to your mother

Your father

Your brother

You girl friend

And two others

Lay untouched.

One of them is missing

It's in my shaking right hand.

The need to read it hurts inside

But I don't want to hear you say good-bye.

Pinch me I must be dreaming

Why can't I just wake up?

No it's not a dream,

I can feel my own touch

The pain sharp

Like that of my heart.

I slowly tear open the flap

The sound of ripping paper is magnified.

Dear best friend,

I'm sorry.

Don't blame yourself

You couldn't have saved me.

Don't be scared

Don't live in the memories.

Life goes on

Don't forget.

So dry your eyes

Lift your head

Live your life.

Say I'm sorry to the others

Tell my mother not to cry.

Don't have any regrets

Just dive into life

Before it's gone.

Remember me

Don't come join me too soon.

Tell someone how you feel

Don't keep it all inside.

If you can't do that all

Then at least try.

I know you're wondering why

But some things are never left unsaid.

So good-bye

Thanks for keeping me here as long as you did.

Love always,

Your best friend.