By:Andrew Troy Keller

As far as I could tell,
There was only one true blonde bombshell
In my life.Her name was
Jennifer Langley Brass
And she really was a true blonde bombshell.

We had met on a Monday
In a rather unexpected way
On the Warner Brothers studio backlot.
At first,I had this plot
To get myself into the movies in a big way.

I was supposed to sneak on to a set
And allow the cameraman to get
As many shots of me
As he could possibly get.

But somehow,I had bumped into
Jenny,who was on her way to
An audition for the part
Of a 19th-Century tart.

One look into her eyes
And I had seen myself as the guy
Who would really love her
With all of his heart--which I would give her
Until the day I die.

That is...if she was still alive.
Anyway,shortly after five,
Jenny and I had gone to her
Favorite restaraunt for a romantic dinner
For two.And then,to a live show.

After the show,I had walked her back
To her apartment,placed my hands on her back
And kissed her ever so passionately on the lips.
Then,after I had placed my hands on her hips,
Jenny had unzipped her dress from the back.

We had experienced erotica so untamed and pure
For about an hour or two.That's for sure.
And at first,I had figured her
To be with me--forever.
But saddly,that wasn't in our future.

Then,after we had gone our seperate ways,
We had finally gotten roles in seperate plays.
After I had recieved the Best Actor Oscar,
I had looked into the audiance,but I was unable to find her.
And after that,I was looking for her for days.

But then,on one Monday
Evening,I had--in a shocking way--
Discovered that poor Jenny
Was making some porno movies,
For she was in a really bad way.

And because of her swallowing a lot of pills,
Her life had really gone downhill.
And then,on a Tuesday,
Both the porno-acting and the drugs had took away
The only woman who I had loved still.

For as far as I could tell,
She'll always be known as the true blonde bombshell
To me--now and forever.
Yes,indeed.I'll always love her,
Even if she's no longer alive for me to tell