Authors note: - I know I know I'm so mean to poor John. But it's so funny when he gets into these weird situations! I'm planning on making this a whole mini-series, various people end up baby sitting Lilly, Bella and Morragon. Guaranteed hilarity. Anyway, I'll update this with chapter two when I get the chance, but right now I'm not fully Lucid due to some heavy pain killers I'm taking.

The Baby-Sitter Files


The night was silent and all seemed well in the world. John sat at his primitive computer typing up notes and preparing for his presentation at work the next day. He was going over the specs for what he wanted to happen with their next PC and how the company could target families and integrate the computer into their life. John was so deeply immersed in his computer world that he didn't notice the door bell ringing. After ringing three times a loud sharp knock on the cellar door jarred him to consciousness. He turned in his seat and stared up the small flight up steps that lead to his steel reinforced cellar doors that were welded shut and had been so for at least five years.

"Hello?" He called out hesitantly.

"John? Are you alright?" A familiar and pleasant voice queried.

"Nightshade? What are you doing here?"

"Can you open the front door so we don't have to shout to each other?" She sounded rushed, something he'd never heard in her before.

"Sure, I'll be right up." John stood up and quickly jogged up the basement stairs to the first floor. He hurried to the front door and unlocked it. When he opened the door he was greeted by a sight that more confused him than anything.

Nightshade stood on his stoop clutching one of her daughters to her chest. Her other two girls were standing beside and behind her. John looked from the pair of innocent faces up to the less innocent face of their mother. Her hair was longer than he'd last seen it, which would normally be strange since the last time they met was only a week ago. It didn't surprise him though, as a demon she could alter her form to suit her needs.

"Hi, Night. What can I do for you?" He finally asked after staring at her longer than would typically be polite.

"I need you to baby sit." She said thrusting forth her eldest child who'd been thus far cuddled into her chest.

"Huh?" He cried out and started to think of some kind of response but his mind failed him.

Nightshade dumped the sleeping child into her arms and the two girls who had so far stood behind her docilely pushed inside past him, almost knocking him over.

"Thanks John!" She said with a smile and a wave. Before he could continue his attempt to get out of the situation Nightshade was gone. John blinked and looked down, into a pair of large black eyes. The child in his arms yawned and stretched out.

"Hi John." She crooned and wiggled out of his grip. The girl dropped to the ground gracefully and skipped inside to where her sisters stood.

John turned around and stared at the trio. Lilly, the eldest who he had momentarily held was wearing a yellow sun dress that didn't fit her pale skin, black hair, black eyes combo. She did however look cute and innocent, something John didn't fall for, for a second. Just like her mother she was part demon and they were never as innocent as they look.

Beside her stood her younger blood sister Bella; they had nothing in common appearance wise. Bella's hair was a shocking white and not nearly as curly as Lilly's. Her eyes never stayed the same color and would altar with her mood. At the moment they were a soft calm blue. She was more dressed for action, wearing well worn jeans, a simple t-shirt and tennis shoes. Seeing her shoes John realized Lilly was barefoot. This seemed odd to him but they were odd to begin with. He shook his head and looked to the last child.

Morragon, who was adopted, looked bored and protectively clutched a book to her chest that seemed almost as big as she was. Her hair was a bronze color mixed with gold and a touch of silver. She had large soulful sad blue eyes that looked far older than her five years of age. Morragon was dressed almost exactly like Bella, save her shirt was blue not white.

After a long moment of silence John waved hesitantly at the trio. They all blinked at him as one, their faces holding a similar 'he's weird' expression.

"So... Um... I guess you guys can watch TV while I work. At least until your mother comes back... Do you know when she's coming back?" He looked from one to the next hoping for an intelligent reply.

"Nope sorry." Lilly said, shaking her head, her whole body swaying with the exaggerated motion.

"So you don't have a clue?"

"If she did she would have told you." Bella said curtly.

"Oh... ok..." John rubbed the back of his neck as he thought. His house was far from childproof. Expensive and highly breakable items littered the whole house. Not a single bit of furniture in the upper floor was younger than fifty years and he was more than a little fearful of what they could do to them.

"I'm hungry." Lilly stated boldly with a big smile.

John's stomach dropped. It had been years since he had bought anything that could qualify as food. His fridge contained nothing more than ice-cream, blood and water. He didn't think the one jar of mustard counted as a food item.

"I uh, guess we can go get something to eat." He shrugged slightly and hoped they agreed to his proposition.

"Let's go to Sally's!" Lilly said jumping up and down clapping.

"Sally's is in New York City Lilly, that's a half hour drive from here." John informed her gently.

Her face fell and she pouted. John melted instantly, unable to withstand her look. She smiled instantly, knowing she'd won.

"You did that on purpose." He said frowning at her.

"Of course I did!" She giggled.

"I can't believe I've just been manipulated by a five year old..." He sighed.

"I'm six! And it was easy." She put her hands on her little hips and glared at him.

John sighed again and opened the front door. "Alright let's go get pizza..."

"Goodie!" Lilly squealed darting out of the door, her sisters followed with far less vigor.

He led them to the garage and opened the door. They girls stared oddly at the car sitting inside. "What?" John asked looking at them. "It's my Dad's car."

"It looks like our Dad's car." Bella said eyeing the vehicle suspiciously.

"Well, they're similar." John shrugged and unlocked the passenger side door motioning them inside. Bella and Lilly climbed into the back seat and Morragon sat next to the driver's seat.

John walked around the car and opened his door. Morragon stared at him as he moved, paying attention to every little moment he made. It unsettled him but he attempted to ignore her. He sat down and started up the car. "Is every one buckled in?"

"Yes." They all said together.

"Alright then let's go." He started up the car and pulled out of the drive way.

As he drove they remained unsettlingly silent, to the point where only their breathing and heart beat gave away their presence. He was disturbed to learn they sounded completely different from adults. John didn't want to apply them to the same standard he didn't adults. They were food and he knew if their father even thought that for a second his darker side remotely considered the possibility of making them dinner he'd shoot him. It wouldn't be the first time he'd been shot by Elwyn, and he was damned sure that would be the only time.

No one said anything until they arrived at the small and almost completely full parking lot located to the side of Sally's Pizza. Sally was a vampire in the same clan as John. He still didn't know why she owned a pizza parlor and his only guess was that she just loved to cook. He'd been told by people that she made the best pizza in the world and he took their word on the matter, as a vampire he could only safely consume liquids. Everything else had to be vomited back up, a task just as unpleasant for the undead as it was for the living.

He parked the car and made sure the doors were locked once their girls were out. They ran full tilt into the restaurant and were already seated at a booth by the time he walked inside. Sally walked over to him and gave him a quick hug. He smiled and hugged her back always happy to see her. It wasn't just because she was an attractive looking woman but mainly because she was so nice.

"I see Nightshade saddled you with her kids tonight." Sally said with a broad warm smile.

"Yeah, unfortunately." John sighed heavily. "I haven't been around kids since I was a kid and even then I didn't really associate with them!"

She laughed and patted his shoulder as they walked to the table. "They are easy to take care of John! A veritable walk in the park."

"I hope so." He muttered sitting down beside Morragon, Lilly and Bella sat across the table from them, looking at the menu.

"Everyone knows what they want?" Sally asked looking at the girls curiously.

"Yep. We all agreed on a large pepperoni pizza with extra cheese and coke please!" Lilly announced gleefully.

Sally nodded and left for the kitchen to make their order. John slumped in the booth and looked at the gathered crowd. It was late and only a few die hard night owls were there, most of the customers were supernaturals of some kind and John could feel their energy humming along his skin. Most were shapeshifters, like werewolves but a few vampires lurked in the corners, mainly there for lack of anywhere better to go. None of them were in his clan and every since a negative run in with an outsider John avoided strange vampires like the plague. Inside of Sally's he felt safe however. She commanded peace with an iron fist that was backed up by Elwyn and his guns. John wasn't the only person afraid of him; Elwyn had the entire supernatural community cowed with fear.

It didn't take long for the girl's dinner to arrive which made John happy. He preferred to keep his time away from home as short as possible. It was rare for him to leave for anything more than cigarettes, sherbert and the sporadic live meal. Sally sat down the large pizza with a flourish.

"Enjoy kids!" She said patting Lilly on the head before going back to work.

Morragon sat her book next to her on the booth and carefully made her selection as if it was deeply important that she picked the correct slice, Lilly and Bella however simply grabbed the closest pieces and began eating without delay. True to her fastidious nature Morragon meticulously sprinkled parmesan cheese on her pizza before folding it in half length wise and eating it. John shook his head in amusement and relaxed while the children devoured their meal. He doubted they could eat all of it and suspected that he'd end up with leftovers in his fridge.

He was almost asleep by the time they were done. Morragon prodded him in the side and he sat up with a yawn. "Done yet?"

Lilly nodded. "Yep! We ate all of it too!"

John looked at the empty pizza pan in surprise. Sure enough all that remained as a testament to their meal was crumbs. He stood up and stretched out stepping away from the booth so Morragon could step out. Once they left the booth he sat a twenty dollar bill on the table and followed the girls out. Sally waved as they left, they all waved back.

"Alright let's get back home..." John said walking towards his car.

"I want to see a movie." Lilly stated at his back.

"It's too late for a movie Lilly, besides I want to get back home I don't like being out for long."

"Pleeeeeeeeeeeease!" She pleaded.

"I want to see a movie too." Bella announced.

John groaned and decided to put his foot down. He wasn't going to be pushed around by a pair of kids. "No. It's too late and I want to go home so we are going back to my house!"

He arrived at the car and opened the door motioning them inside. Morragon sat in the back this time and Lilly claimed the passenger seat. She had her arms folded over her chest and was pouting severely. John thought it was a little cute the way her eyebrows furrowed together angrily and she jutted out her lower lip. He climbed in and started the car pulling out of the parking lot. As they came to a red light Lilly lowered the passenger window and leaned out. John turned his head to see what she was looking it.

A police car pulled up beside them, the officer had his window down and his elbow hanging out. He glanced over as the child leaned out of the car. Lilly took a deep breath and John was filled with a deep sense of foreboding.

"Help! We're being kidnapped!" Lilly screeched; her little voice full of panic.

"What!?" John yelled in shock.

The police officer instantly turned on his lights and sirens. John put the car in park and held his hands up. The cop climbed out of the car and walked around to John's side while his partner opened the passenger door and motioned the girls out.

"Sir pull the car over into the parking lot and get out." He ordered him gruffly.

John nodded and very slowly pulled back into the parking lot and parked the car. He then stepped out; hands held up and turned to face his car.

The police officer searched him and began reading him his rights. "You have the right to remain silence..."

At the now green light the other police officer was helping the girls into the front seat of their cruiser. John bowed his head as his hands were hand cuffed behind his back. He knew the night was going to rough but he never imagined he'd be arrested for kidnapping. The officer pulled him over to their car and shoved him so forcibly into the back seat that John ended up falling on his side. He remained there and sighed sadly. John made no attempt to talk his way out of the situation, he knew that anything he said wouldn't be believed and no matter what he was screwed.

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