Julius Caesar wore a dress

Julius Caesar wore a dress.

I don't care what you say;

It was a dress.

Lots of people in Rome wore dresses

They made them out of bedsheets.

Any sheet would do so long as they don't have cartoon animals all over them.

They drank a lot of wine then,

Grape juice if they couldn't sneak it passed their mom.

They wore leaves on their head too;

Just make sure it ain't poison ivy.

That itches like a mother.

Julius Caesar crossed the Rubicon:

Where the heck is the Rubicon?

I hope it ain't too far:

Mama says I can't go past the end of the block

Or cross the street without her along.

He loved Cleopatra (or was that Marc Antony).

They kissed a lot.

(Eww…Gross!)

And they didn't even have no shots back then.

He was stabbed by his friends;

His last words were—A Two Brew Tay—

Whatever the heck that means.

Maybe he wanted a beer.

Sometimes Papa wants a beer after a long day's work.

I don't care what you say

Julius Caesar wore a dress.