my friends/family (in order of appearence)
IN CANADA
Stef: My first friend at Holy Trinity.
Me: Well . . . me.
Adrian: Former best friend.
Mr. Connors: Principal of Holy Trinity.
guy 1 and guy 2: They were on the bus. I can't remember their names . . .
Meghan: Sits at my table during lunch.
Jane: Now dating Adrian.
Nicole: Sits at my table.
Ainsley: Used to be in my homeroom . . . at times. She's in French Immersion.
Ricky: Big guy. Has something against me.
Mrs Callanan: Currently my homeroom teacher. Used to be just my socials teacher.
Marcus: Loser. Loser. Loser.
Ducey: Really thought he was an idiot when I first got here. Now I'm his 'hero'. =)
Nick: One of my first guy friends at HTE.
Eddie: Quite a nice guy. First male to talk to me here. He might hate me now after this
thing at Nick's party . . .
Mr Leaman: Used to be my homeroom teacher. Has quite a large stick up his ass.
Rebecca: In my homeroom. Gets away with a lot.
Mrs Hammond: Health teacher at HTE. She's retired now.
Kristen: Umm . . . she thinks I'm Canadian.
Matthew: Ah, Matthew, where to start? "Good aftermorning, miss!" lol
Alison: Sat in front of me. Likes to throw things.
Chad: Hockey fanatic. Nickname: Flatrock
Mrs. Furlong: LA teacher at HTE. Engaged.
Dalton: Really tall guy. One of Adrian's friends.
Jana: Hangs out with Alison. Usually getting things thrown at her.
Heather: Hangs with me and Jana and Alison.
Jennifer: Also hangs out with our group.
Courtney: Kinda loud, but can be hilarious.
Steven: Newer than me. From Nova Scotia.
Scottie: Lil tiny guy in my class. It's kinda sad, but because of his size, I can't help
treating him like a lil bro.
Sarah Felthum: Umm . . . she used to sit at my lunch table.
Ryan M: Kinda quiet, smart guy. Ya know, the Dungeons and Dragons type.
Linsdey: Yet another member of our group.
Terry: One of Adrian's friends. Pretty cool guy, but he never really talks to me.
Winnie: My great aunt Winnie. The poor woman had a mesectomy. (she had a breast
removed)
Geraldine: Mom's friend.
John: Geraldine's son.
Grandpa: Well . . . what do YOU think?
IN THE STATES
Jeff: Odd guy. Hilarious, though.
Mark: Huge, huge guy. I always say that he's built like a fridge.
Mr. Adams: My homeroom teacher at Kellogg. Cool guy.
Nick: Tiny guy. A bit of a snob
Emi: My bestest friend ever!!
Kor: One of my best guy friends from the States.
Kiera: My 3 year-old sister.
Mom: Kinda self-explanitory.
Noah: My 10 year-old brother.
Jules: My stepdad. Only funny when he's tired, or sick.

Quotes:

SCHOOL:

White Hills Skiing Trip:

(we're harassin adrian about his nose.)
Stef: Look at it, it's huge!
Me: Maybe if you break it, it'll shrink?
Adrian: My nose is a sex symbol!!!!
..........
Stef: Adrian, there's some Dorito on your nose.
Adrian: Care to lick it off?
*eewww, eewww, no adrian*
..........
(stef and i are listening to a south park cd)
Cartman: Fuck, fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!
*principal walks over and grabs my earbud*
Stef: *panicked look*
Me: * frantically pressing the 'pause' button on my walkman*
Mr Connors: Do you hear anything? I don't hear anything?
Stef: *blank look*
Me: *blank look while also putting my walkman into 'lock mode'*
..........
guy 1: *cranks up volume on the boombox he brought for the ride*
guy 2: *grabs boombox*
guy 2: Hey look! *grabs the strap from a backpack on the upper shelf thingy on the bus
and starts to tie it to the handle of the boombox*
guy 1: Surround sound!! *starts to spin boombox*
*boombox falls and lands on guy 2*
guy 2: *scream*
..........
(it's an early dissmissal day for the primary grades. the Kindergarten kids are in the
cafeteria for their afterschool daycare. they've been kinda 'fenced in' with the lunch
tables.)
*stef, meghan, jane, nicole, and i all walk in to the cafeteria. we look around for our lunch
table which has dissapeared. meghan walks over to the Kindergartens and takes one of the
tables that has them 'fenced in'*
Jane: But that was there to keep them in!!!
(later on. a Kindergartener walks up to the assistant principal with a dazed look on his
face.)
Me: Stef, he's still in shock from being 'let out'.
Stef: I'm freeeeeee!
..........
(early morning, before class)
Me: (insert burn here)
Stef: Correction, shut up.
..........
(5 minutes before dissmissal bell. adrian is sitting on his desk in a slightly . . . provocative
pose.)
Ainsley: Tell Adrian to close his legs.
Ricky: Adrian, close your legs.
Adrian: You knows you wants me to leave 'em open.
*ricky overturns adrian's desk, with him on it.*
..........
(about a week before exams. in socials, we're reviewing what will be on the exams.)
Mrs. Callanan: There will be questions about the war in Argentina. [personally i think she
meant "the war in Afghanistan"]
Adrian: There's a war in Argentina? *singing* Don't cry for me Argentina!!
..........
(marcus is running from ducey, who usually decks him a few times before class starts. he
trips and lands in front of me.)
Me: At my feet!! As it should be!!
..........
(mid-day break has just started. stef and i are at her locker. nick walks up.)
Nick: Good morning, ladies. May I tell you that you are both looking more radient every
day?
Me: *doubled over laughing*
Stef: What do you want Nick?
Nick: Anybody have any money?
..........
(in phy-ed. half of the class is playing soccer, while the other half watches.)
Adrian: *yelling* Eddie!! You suck!!
Me: Adrian's working on his motivational skills.
..........
(marcus is getting beat up on again.)
Me: Personally, I think we should kill him. But that's just me.
..........
(leaman is lecturing us on the importance of cleanliness.)
Mr. Leaman: So when I'm down in my Rec Room to eat, if there's anything out of place,
I'll put down my food and fix it. Then---
Rebecca: *leans over with incredulous look on her face* You put down your food?!
..........
(health class. mrs hammond is telling us how body language can tell us a lot. she's telling
us all what it looks like we're thinking, judging from our body language.)
Mrs. Hammond: Kristen, you look like you're not paying attention, but are hiding behind
Alison so I can't tell that you're not listening.
Kristen: *shrugs*
Mrs. Hammond: Marcus looks--
Matthew: Hungry.
..........
(health class again. we're talking about comfortable and uncomfortable situations, and
what makes each such.)
Mrs. Hammond: *puts hand on Alison's shoulder* Now if I had my hand on your shoulder
while I was helping you with question, would you feel uncomfortable, Alison?
Alison: No.
Mrs. Hammond: *puts hand on Chad's shoulder and faces class* Now Chad, if I was
talking to the whole class, paying no attention to you, and had my hand on your shoulder,
would you feel uncomfortable?
Chad: *nods*
PA System: Miss?
Mrs. Hammond: *didn't hear PA*
Me: Sorry Miss, she's too busy touching Chad.
..........
(language class. we're sharing our "custom fairy tales". adrian's group has "Jack and the
Beanstalk")
Adrian: . . . Jack looked out the window, and saw the magic cow urinating on the ground.
And from there grew a magnificent beanstalk.
(nick's group has "The Gingerbread Man")
Nick: . . . and so the Gingerbread Man laid her down on the bed . . .
Mrs. Furlong: *horrified look*
..........
(skating trip. a guy wearing a Team Canada jersey sktaes by.)
Me: Oooh look! It's Team Canada!! Let's throw rocks at him!!
Dalton: But we're ALL Canadians. We'd ALL just throw rocks back at you.
Me: Good point.
..........
(just general chatting.)
Alison: . . . and they left me at the table!! We were at McDonald's and I started choking,
and they went to another table!!!
Jana: We were all "We don't know her."
..........
(after 2nd bell, before class starts)
PA System: And now our thought of the day. This is from [i don't remember their names]
Jane and John Doe from room 123: Why don't ghosts live in houses? . . . Because they
have living Rooms!!
Me (to Alison): That wasn't a thought! It was a brain fart, that's what it was!!
..........
Stef: I'm older than you!!
Adrian: So?
Stef: No, you don't understand, I'm OLDER than you!
Adrian: . . .
..........
(bowling trip)
Dalton: (insert a "janaism" here)
Jana: Hey!! You used my phrase!!
Dalton: I am my own person.
..........
Me: You start to realize how short you are when you keep gettin hit in the face with
people's shoulders.
..........
(we're readin speeches in language class.)
Adrian: *reads a bit of his speech*
Class: *really loud*
Adrian: *pauses*
Class: *quiets down*
Adrian: *finishes*
Class (with ducey eggin em on): booo!!
(now ducey is readin his speech)
Ducey: He shoots, he scor--
Adrian (all by his lonesome): BOOO!
..........
(mr leaman is lecturing us about writin on our desks. he sat on a student's desk that day,
and got ink all over his $100 pants. : P)
Mr Leaman: Now see Matthew? You have ink spots all over your desk.
Matthew: The pen attacked me earlier, sir.
..........
(middle of religion class.)
Chad: *flicks rubber band against eddie's ear.)
Eddie: Jesus!!
Class: shhhhh!
Leaman: *turns around* What's goin on here, b'ys?
Eddie and Chad: *silent*
Me: He *points to Chad* was disrupting his *points to Eddie* learning environment . . .
sir.
..........
(french class. making a chart on how active the class is.)
Mrs Furlong: So, would you say you are a fairly active bunch?
Class: Yes . . .
Adrian: I'll bet we're more active than you, Miss.
Mrs Furlong: *indignant look* Really now? I get up at 6 every morning and walk.
Adrian (sarcastically): Oh b'ys, give her a hand, she walks. *claps*
Me (yelling from back of room): Adrian spits on his boots, Miss, that's what he does.
..........
(in music class. we're supossed to be takin notes.)
Someone: Oh, well we best be sending him to the Waterford (it's a mental hospital here)
b'ys!
Adrian (yells): They give ya free fruit baskets!
Class: *looks at adrian*
Adrian: But they do!!
..........
(guy from another class has just walked in.)
Guy: *shows people all the jawbreakers he has*
Class: I want one!
Guy: *gives one to jana. turns to leave*
Me: I should get one just 'cause I'm here.
Guy: *thorws jawbreaker to me*
Me: *incredulous look* Hey, it worked!!
..........
(in LA, we're talkin about how canadians know about the usa, but americans don't know
about canada.)
Mrs Furlong: So, Hannah, I'll bet you didn't know what the capital of Canada was when
you got here.
Me: . . . I still don't . . .
Matthew: It's Newfoundland.
..........
(leaman wants us to be totally quiet. if we are, we get to skip religion class.)
Jennifer (whispering): Kristen!
Courtney: Shut up! Shut the fuck up!
..........
(in computer lab doing research on composers of musicals.)
Adrian: Miss? Who did 'Jason and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat'?
Me: *laughter* Jason!! Yeah, it's Jason and his dream coat! *laughter*
Adrian: Well what? Look at the screen!! The type's all small!
Me: K, this is going in the quote-book.
..........
(in the middle of research.)
Computer: *screen goes black*
Me: It died!!
..........
(in gym. ducey has been climbing inside this big huge cardboard tube thingy)
Courtney: *tips over tube*
(ducey is now stuck in tube rollin along the stage in the gym. his feet are stickin out.)
Me: Ducey! Where's the cream filling?
..........
(leaman is passin out science tests.)
Leaman: Chad Waterman. *singing* Waterman, waterman, watch out for the waterman!
..........
(in gym)
Rebecca: Do you think Nick smells?
Me: *shrugs*
Steven: Well I doubt many people sniff him.
..........
(we're playing 7-up at the end of socials.)
Group: Heads up 7-up!
Marcus: *stands up*
Miss Callanan: *counts standing people* There's 8. There should only be 7.
Marcus: Well I think someone tapped me. Something hit my head.
Me: No, I just threw a crayon at you.
..........
(french class. our unit is on collections.)
Miss Furlong: What collections do any of you have?
Matt: Comic books.
Ducey: The little stanley cups from the beer cases, Miss.
Miss Furlong: What do other people collect?
Me: Antiques.
Nick: Plates.
Ducey: The little stanley cups from the beer cases, Miss.
Miss Furlong: What are some strange collections?
Stef: Cars.
Scottie: Wrappers.
Ducey: The little stanley cups from the beer cases, Miss.
Miss: What are some expensive collections?
Ducey: Th--
Miss: *brandishes meter stick* And if you mention anything about a beer case, I will
smack you upside the head.
..........
(we're supossed to be making movie posters for a novel we read. we have to include a
cast list.)
Ricky: Can I use Mr. Leaman for Levi Coffin?
Miss Furlong: No, you need to use real actors.
Matt: Levi Coffin was a good man. Mr. Leaman is not.
..........
(at the dance. this is more of an action than a quote, but it's too hilarious to leave out.)
Matt: *dancing with girlfriend*
Someone behind Matt's g/f: *does something to piss matt off*
Matt (with his arms around his g/f's neck): *gives him the finger*
..........
(last period or so. a car can be heard squealing through the parking lot.)
Matt: Well, Mom's here!
..........
(gym. we're all kind wandering around, and chad and some other guys are playin baseball
on the other side of the fence.)
Me: Let's throw rocks at Chad.
Stef: Sounds good to me.
Kristin: *throws rock*
Group: *holds breath*
Rock: *hits chad in the back of the leg*
Kristin: *squeaks and runs from the fence*
..........
(the rumor is goin around that mr leaman has dyed his hair blonde.)
Mr L: *walks into room*
Class: *breaks into laughter*
Mr L: *walks back out*
..........
(mr leaman is givin chad a hard time about coloring something during science.)
Mr L: You're in 7th grade, are you enjoying Crayola?
Chad: Sir, look at your hair. Looks like you got mixed up with crayola.
..........
(we're comparing notes on all the things that get yelled from outside the school, up
through our windows)
Me: Yeah, they're usually callin Matt.
Someone else: Oh, well an english muffin once flew through our window. Almost hit
Sarah Felthum in the head.
..........
(later on, i'm asking sarah about the english muffin.)
Sarah: Yeah, and I was like 'Omg, I could've died!!!'
..........
**to fully understand this one, you have to go read the 9th quote in the MY HOUSE
category**
(we're talkin about the human digestive system in science.)
Mr L: So does anyone know the regions of our taste buds are?
Ryan M.: Salty, sour, sweet, spicy . . .
Adrian: *looks back at me*
Both of us: *shakes head*
Adrian: *raises his hand* Sir, I was readin these KFC Brain Busters cards . . . and spicy
isn't a taste.
Mr L: You read too much, Adrian.
Me: *raises hand* I think they found a new one or something. It's like a meaty sorta taste,
and I think it's u-m-a-m-i or something.
Adrian: And I read too much . . .
..........
(LA class, with the music teacher as a sub. we're supossed to be doing a practice exam.
people keep whistling, and it's driving her insane.)
Someone: *whistling*
Miss Cumby: Alright, who was that?
Adrian: *raises hand* It was me, Miss.
Miss C: *points to door* Out.
Adrian: *shocked look* But--
Nick: Man, you are stupid.
Adrian: *on his way out* Fine, then I guess I won't do my exam. Fine! Kick me out! *gets
closer to door, where he has to pass Miss C* (whispering) Okaay, you can back out any
time now . . .
..........
(Mr L is doing attendance.)
Rebecca: So Sir, when do we get our pizza party? (we won one in the fund-raiser)
Mr L: I talked to everyone else, and the teachers are gonna have it.
Me: Sir, there are more of us than there are of you.
..........
(i walk into the classroom with my new hair color. it's a kinda of blonde-ish orange. mr L
has also bleached his hair.)
Mr L: So Hannah, trying to look like Sir?
Me: Sir, there was a list of pros and cons, and looking like you was on the cons list.
..........
(in socials class.)
Stef: Miss, can I use the washroom?
Miss C: You can go in 5 minutes, Stef.
Stef: *groan*
Adrian: Give 'er a jar . . . and a funnel.
..........
(socials. scottie is imitating adrian's every move.)
Adrian: *raises hand*
Scottie: *raises hand*
Miss C: Yes, Scott?
Scottie: *thinks for a quick sec* What's a census again?
Miss C: It's where the government collects information on housing, jobs, population, etc.
Adrian: *still has hand in the air*
Scottie: *raises hand again*
Mis C: Yes, Scott?
Scottie: *thinks* Well, what does census MEAN?
..........
(at lunch table during recess.)
Alison (to me): You're depressing.
Me: What? I am not.
Alison: Yes you are. You're so perfect, and it's depressing. Just keeps showin us how
stupid we are.
Me: Umm . . . well . . .
Alison (to group): I hate you all.
Me (imitating singing Cartman): I hate you guys! *(harmonica tune)nee-nee-nee-nee* You
guys are assholes! *nee-nee-nee-nee* Especially Kenny! *nee-nee-nee-nee* I hate him the
most!
..........
(on the bus. andrea is passin around her agenda for people to sign.)
Andrea: *tosses angenda to terry* You little bastard, sign my agenda!
Me: Well, Andrea, I think he's just got this warm, fuzzy feeling now.
..........
(at the end of our honors ceremony. we still have 20minutes till they let us out.)
Mr Connors: Well, now I've got 20 minutes to fill . . .
Me: Sing!
..........
(last day. we're just talking and stuff.)
Colin (who had had his hood pulled up over his head and drawsrtinged shut.): I think I'll
take this off now, I'm starting to (word not heard by us).
Kristin: Swell? You're starting to swell?
Me: Ya mean ya can get any bigger?
..........
(we're discussing living things in science.)
Marcus (with another one of his dumb stories): . . . and then he hit this skunk -
Ashley: There are no skunks in Newfoundland. *points to marcus* Wait, there's one!!
..........
(still in science)
Mrs Bollas: So all living things reproduce . . . oh god, Marcus is going to reproduce.
..........
(science *sheesh*)
Mrs Bollas: All living things grow. You guys will eventually find that your pants are too
short, etc.
Matthew: *holds up his pantleg* (his pants are huge) No, I don't think so, Miss.
Mrs Bollas: Ok, so everyone here but Marcus and Matthew are living things.
..........
(science. we're getting kind of noisy.)
Mrs Bollas: My friends and Marucs . . .
..........