Your Last Fall

You gave into the need

Far too many times.

The one that burns

Until your happiness dies.

No one really cares,

You thought in dismay.

You would lift the knife,

And find your own way.

A way to flee the hurt

And to diminish the need.

The one that always itches,

Until you give in and bleed.

Not too deep,

But enough to feel the pain.

A little of blood,

But the sting makes you sane.

You told me that

You never want to die.

But now I think about it,

Was it all a lie?

I was waiting by the phone,

Waiting for your call.

Instead I got a note,

About the way you planned your fall.

I will always love you,

My dearest friend.

Don't think it was your fault,

That I brought myself to the end.

I planned this since last year,

Before I had met you.

And even though we were close,

I couldn't continue.

So remember that I love you,

My dearest friend.

We'll be best friends,

Even after my end.

The police told me about it,

The way you hung the rope.

It's funny to think you were a cutter,

I guess I was messed up on dope.

Had you really thought about me,

When you had ended your life?

And all those times did you think of me,

Whenever you lifted that knife?

And on that fatal night,

As the rope was hung,

Did you forget our happy times,

And all the songs we sung?

Was my friendship not worth

The simple breath to live?

Just a scratch of your knife,

That was all I could forgive.

But, my dear dead friend,

You had to end it all.

Why couldn't you have told me,

You were about to fall?

Standing up on that stool,

Waiting for the guts to walk.

One small step off that stool—

Why wouldn't you just talk?

Falling through the air,

Stop a foot above the ground.

The rope had caught you,

And your eyelids fell down.

Had you thought of me,

Right then and there?

Had you felt anything,

Even the slightest care?

It really did hurt,

When I found out.

Did you expect me,

To just scream and shout?

Why hadn't you told me?

Why didn't you call?

Why didn't you tell me,

You were about to fall?