5/25/03

It's Over Now.. Will it EVER Return?!?

Oh If only you knew
If only you cared that way still
But it does not matter
It's gone now
It's over, through
I lost my chance
I was the fool
Oh, but what's that matter now
I'm through
My life is gone
My soul is empty
My heart has broken in two
Yet still I can't seem to give up on you
It doesn't matter that you're with someone new
My feelings for you have never gone
Why should she be jealous?
I'm the envious one now
I lost my chance
Now all I have left to do
Is cry
For I cannot do anything any more
Not now
I'm needing you more now than ever
But I can't have you in my life
Not this time
You say I may find someone again some day
But I look ahead
Try to think of someone new
But all I seem to be seeing is you
You haunt my thoughts,
My dreams and fantasies
It matters not now
You're gone
And my life is through
The pain deepens
It keeps trying to consume me
I keep fighting
It'll win soon if I don't watch myself
At every mention of her name
At every thought of losing you
I slip further into that empty hole
I hear your voice, your breathing, your laughter
It lifts me up,
Then breaks me down as you say her name
And I know once again
You are no longer mine
But you are hers
And now my life is through
Though I live on
In hopes of being with you again one day soon
Living for having a life
Trying to think of something new
Though it always comes back to you
God it hurts so
To hear you talk of her
Though I need to hear more
No matter how much it tears my heart in two
But god I can't respond
It hurts so much
Others say or said I was the one for you
I knew it too
But now it's through
And now I can't stop crying
Now that I've lost that final chance of being with you
Oh god it hurts so bad
My heart is so heavy
So damp with tears
And weighted down in jealousy
But it matters not
You're happy....