i look around
my mouth's the only frown
that stands out in a crowd
everyone else is laughing
not with me but at me
laughing at the imprefections of my anatomy
where can i retreat?
where can i stay away from this pain and misery
i'm beaten with judgement in the street
in my own home i'm treated like a freak
i get shit on at work,
any girl with the nerve
to get close to me
only hurt me emotionally
my own shadow's choking me
this loneliness engulfs me tottaly
i go out hoping for someone to show me
unconditional love and just hold me
hope that someone will show me
compassion, comfort with hugs
i don't need a filthy hole plug for fun
instead i end up getting disrespected
come home more alone than i ever felt before

i'm so cold
i'm just looking for a coat
i wanna keep warm in this world,
i know i gotta put a jacket on
but i'm finding it's too hard
to find the right one
cause even if it fits
it may not protect from heavy winds

i've waited by the phone
just in case somebody phoned
wasted many nights online
thinking maybe someone might say hi
i've turned down my stereo
so i could hear the door bell's chime
i'm a pathetic wreck,
a fractured skeleton that's collapsed over stress
i'm a classic case of misplaced rage
paranoid disgrace of the christian faith
name your cliche
no place with kids that can relate?
no good influencial music to listen to?
plain teenage angst with no vent
to let bent up hate safely escape?
whatever the case
wherever lays the blame
every day since my first birthday