Dry spell

She sat frozen to the pew
Eyes glazed yet burning dry
Lost in thoughts as mourners past by
A warm hug or smile
A gentle shoulder clap
A word of remorse

All things slid off like oil on water
Only skimming the surface

"She's in shock"
"The poor dear"

inside ,
where the watchers couldn't see
she screamed
deep down
where the priers couldnt reach
she lashed out

drowning in pain while her eyes stood dry
drowning in anger as her heart turned cold
drowning in sin as her head turned away

she stood .

all eyes turned to her
straight backed
eyes empty
soul...

right foot, left foot.
Swing arm, bend knee.
She moved mechanically
No finesse to those round hips
No pride in those shuffling feet
no conceit in those slouched shoulders

three steps and a song began

' because he lived....'

The same song again

'I can face tomorrow'

the darkness closing in

'my life is worth'

closed her eyes and ran

'the living just '

the pain comes again

'because he lived'

Once again she awakes
Cloaked in sweat
Drowning
Glued to thin sheets
Frozen by fear

Finally she stands
Tip toes to the door
Listens
The hallway is dark and empty
but soft sounds come from closed doors

last on the right
opens with a click.

He is there
stretched out as he had been
but with out the make up
with out the tailored tux
a smile lifting the corners of lips
natural with the hint of waking in the morning

she returns to her soaked bed
and prays that there is always a tomorrow
for that smile to greet