Online and Offline Love

Hmm…life is funny, huh? I just wish that I can be more of my…true self…really. I am truly myself when I'm online that's why I love to chat with people on AIM. They all love me there…but in real life…I have no one…

I have a crush on Ken for over a year now…I'm in 9th grade…yes; he's in the same high school as me, oh joy! Is that really what you think? 'Oh joy!'? No, it's not supposed to be like this…I'm not suppose to see him anymore…middle school was supposed to be the end of my love for him.

But no, my love for him is growing within each second of the day…it seems like it'll never stop growing. I have to keep reminding myself that I have no chance with him. He's handsome and popular around the girls and guys.

And I…I'm nothing but a regular silent girl in a couple of his classes…but I still enjoy every minute with him…just staring at him and him looking a little my way would make my heart leap with joy. I treasure these tiny moments. I dream about us at night too…I never want to leave my dreams…but they're…they're…

FAKE, the one word I hate the most. Why? Why must my love life be so fake? Why?? There is nothing I can do about it. I tried to move on with life…and that's when AIM showed up. I started to use it more frequently everyday.

I met really nice people online. There is this guy who I love to talk to…he share the same name as Ken…sometimes I would find myself thinking about him. Since I can't have the real Ken, might as well have this online Ken.

I sighed. I had just awoken from my slumber…my wonderful slumber…I looked out the window. It was a beautiful day out but since I have nothing to do on a Saturday morning, I decided to go online.

I opened my computer and went on AOL. I didn't really like talking to people with AOL so I went on the AIM I downloaded. My screen name is Alter My Destiny. A few seconds later my buddy list popped up.

I scanned my list hoping and praying that someone would be on so I can talk to someone. I saw his screen name…coolestdudeon1….I smiled and clicked on his screen name. Before I could write anything, he wrote to me first.

Coolestdudeon1: hey, sam, wazzup?

I smiled. Yes, I lie online…well not really. My whole name is Samantha Martha Reeds. I told him my name was Sammie, close right? He calls my Sam mostly, it's pretty cute, no one ever called me that. Only Samantha…or sometimes my whole name.

Alter My Destiny: nothing much, you?

Yeah, I talk in complete sentences…so what? It's not exactly complete sentences; I just don't like using those "online words" too much.

Coolestdudeon1: same here, boring day! wat r u doing so early n e ways?

Alter My Destiny: nothing much really. i was hoping you'd be on though! you are my fav. buddy online! J

Coolestdudeon1: aww, i feel soooo loved lol but ur my fav. buddy online too J

I was shocked. No one had ever said that to me…he's just making me happy. That must be it. I said everyone loved me online meaning that they all accept me online but not this way…I keep thinking it's the Ken I'm in love with! Stop it, Samantha! He isn't Ken! Not the Ken you love! I have to keep that in mind. Online love and offline love is completely different. Offline love will get you somewhere but not for me, online love is completely, 100%, fake. No love can survive through lies. Plus, I've never met this Ken in real life before…or…maybe I did. He did say that he lives in New York City …

I found myself smiling at that fact. I decided to write back.

Alter My Destiny: that is sweet lol so what are you doing right now?

Coolestdudeon1: who? me?

Alter My Destiny: lol, yeah you!

Coolestdudeon1: o nm hey, yd you make ur sn alter my destiny?

Alter My Destiny: lol you really wanna know? why not tell me why you chose your sn first?

Coolestdudeon1: ok, ill tell u 1st u tell mi after k?

Alter My Destiny: sure

Coolestdudeon1: ok its cuz i am the coolest dude on lol J

Alter My Destiny: lol

Coolestdudeon1: now tell mi y u chose tat sn

Alter My Destiny: why do you wanna know anyways?

Coolestdudeon1: just cuz! now as u promised tell mi y u chose tat sn!!

Alter My Destiny: fine, i'll tell you why. it's cuz i dislike my life, happy now? i know how my destiny would be and i don't like it.

Coolestdudeon1: r u sum sort of physic or sumthing??

Alter My Destiny: lol, nope. but i know how my future would be, i can tell easily…i'm not gonna have a good future…*sighs* don't ask any questions please…some things are just too personal to share…sorry

Coolestdudeon1: o its ok i wont ask if u dont want mi to

Alter My Destiny: ok, thank you. oh look! it's getting late, i need to get off before my parents wake up and see that i'm online. i gotta go

Coolestdudeon1: alright ill see ya tomorrow? or maybe l8ter on in the day?

Alter My Destiny: later on in the day, bye!

Coolestdudeon1: bye

I got offline as quickly as I could and jumped back into bed. I laid there thinking. Am I in love with this Ken too? No, of course not. Online love is fake. Hmm…I'm in love with too much Kens, hehe.

I got up from bed and walked over to my mirror. I sighed again. I have the biggest blue eyes I've ever seen. My hair is shoulder length or maybe a little longer than that. Yeah, you guessed it; I have blonde hair and blue eyes…lame, huh?

I shrugged and walked out the room still wearing my pajamas. I went straight to the bathroom though. I combed my hair and brushed my teeth. My hair was always tied in a pony tail when going somewhere like out of bed. After my ritual, I went back to my room to change.

I opened my closet full of clothes, well, duh, they're full of clothes. I scanned through them and pulled a white shirt out. It said "Princess"…oh pul-lease! This shirt isn't for me. I'm not even close to being one. My mom must have bought it for me. I can't wear this anywhere unless it's close to the truth. I threw it aside and continued to find the right clothing to ware.

A-ha! This'll do just nicely. I took out another white shirt, except this time the words were "Are you happy?". I tried to find something to match that shirt and found a skirt instead. It was black, knee length. I put it on and looked at my mirror again.

I looked at my skirt. It was pretty short to me. Hmm…maybe I need to wear pants under it? Maybe not because then it wouldn't match my shoes...fine, I'll leave it like this then. It's not like I'm likely to bump into someone I know anyway…hopefully.

I looked at my shirt now. Hmm…white doesn't really look good on me but it'll do. I put my black boots on and walked into the living room. To my surprise, no one was out. I walked over to the breakfast table and saw a note.

Samantha, your father and I need to go to work for an important meeting, sorry but we were too busy to make breakfast. Go outside and eat okay? Love mom.

I sighed sadly. I opened to television and turned to channel 1. I looked at the bottom left corner of the screen. It was now 76 degrees. I closed the television and grabbed my purse and walked out of the house.

The sun was high in the sky today. I walked on the streets feeling a little nervous. I've never been outside alone in the morning to buy breakfast. I continued walking and looking through stores. Then BOOM!

I fell down. I was shocked. How did I fall? Oh, that's right. Someone bumped into me, who's that idiot anyway??

I got up madly and looked at the boy who bumped into me. He was still on the floor. I couldn't see his face because he was blocking it from the sun. I sneered, "Excuse me but you happened to bump into me."

Yeah I know, it's partly my fault too but still! Fine, fine, fine, I'll apologize first. "Um…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to not look at where I'm going, are you okay?" I asked bending down to see if he's okay.

"Wow, you sure change your attitude fast, I'm okay by the way, thanks for asking," he got up and looked at me.

SHOCKED. Words can't express what I'm feeling at the moment. I was frozen. It was him…Ken…

"Hmm, you look familiar…are you from my school? H.S. 275?" he questioned. We stared at each other.

I got up later and cleared my throat, "Ahem…um..yeah, I know you but I don't think you know me, you are Ken, correct?"

"Yeah, so you are from my school! What's your name?"


"So, nice name, can I call you Sam?"

I blushed; he's just like the Ken online! So sweet, I knew I didn't fall in love with the wrong person!

Author's Notes: Hope you guys liked this story. If so, please review…even if you don't like it, do review anyway, please? This story concentrates on only Samantha by the way or maybe Ken some day like in other chapters. ^^ Also I don't think there's such school as HS 275. I made it up but if that is a real school, cool.