He Punks Me Not

By: TheQueenofCliche

1 – Tongue Rings

"Class dismissed."

I got up quickly, shoving papers into my textbook and jamming my textbook under my arm. I hurried out of my Trigonometry class with the rest of my classmates, eager to get to lunch. The Trig test I had just finished was completely mind-boggling. I don't know why I was taking the class in the first place anyway. Maybe because my father told me to take it… I don't remember.


I slowed to a stop when I heard the familiar voice and turned around. "Hey Riley," I waited patiently for my best friend, Riley Hernandez to catch up. She was carrying a bunch of books, so I guess she just got out of study hall.

"You gonna put your books up?" she greeted me. I nodded.

"Meet you outside in five?" I asked, checking my watch.

Riley smirked. "Sure… I might be late though… my locker's upstairs." She grimaced. "But, just start eating without me anyway okay?"

"Sure," I said. "Is Sandra coming?"

Riley shrugged. "If she isn't held back in gym. See ya." We separated, her up the stairs, me continuing down the hall. A few people waved and called hi. I waved back, but wasn't really paying attention. Outside, I thought. I have to get outside before he leaves!

I hurried impatiently to my locker, quickly doing the combination, flinging it open, throwing my book in, slamming the locker shut, mixing up the combination all over again then sprinting away.

The school doors came to view, but before I could reach it, someone blocked my path.

"Charisse!" Cassie cried, holding out her hands as if to shield herself. "Please! Watch where you're going. What's the hurry?"

"Lunch," I said impatiently, trying to side step my older cousin. "You're track meeting over?"

She nodded significantly. "Me and Rodney Marking tied." She grinned. "Soon, I'll be the fastest in this whole school!"

"That's great, cuz." I said. "Can you please move? I need to go eat lunch!"

"Lunch is a whole hour," she expressed lazily. "Why don't you just skip eating for once—Jenna!" she waved, standing on her tiptoes. "Jenna, guess what?" I sighed with relief as she ran away. Ran away to wherever her long, famous legs took her.

I shook my head and hurried out side. I let out a squeal of happiness once I exited the building. There he was. As usual, always there. Sitting sprawled on the ground with all his other friends.


Well, Oz Michael Anderson to be more specific. (I don't know his real first name, so don't ask). I bit my lip and quickly sat down on the stone steps. I opened my bag, and pretended to eat while watching him. His back was rested against the tree, one knee up and the other leg stretched out lazily.

I leaned against the stonewalls and bit into my turkey sandwich, watching him. His ear length black hair was tousled absently on his head, clear blue eyes expressionless. I jerked back when he glanced up, looking around.

"Hey Riz!"

I jumped, looking up to see Sandra Washington, walking towards me from the parking lot, waving. I quickly got up, acting as if I was waiting for her the whole time. "Sandy! Where were you? I thought you were in gym."

Sandra grinned. "I had to take this class over at Westfield." She shrugged and sat beside me. "I'm having gym after lunch."

"Okay," I turned back to Oz.

"You still watch him?" she asked with incredulity, laughter evident in her tone. "Geez Riz, go talk to him if you like him so much."

"Shh!" I hissed. "Are you crazy? Talk to him? He'd probably forget about me the next day with all that drinking he does! And anyway, he'll think I'm a freak or something!"

Sandra tutted softly. "You can do so much better than some loser like him, Riz. Paul Bridge was asking about you again." She said while inspecting her fingernails. "You know, Paul from the school basketball team."

I waved it away. "Paul's only interested cuz I'm Cassie's cousin." I replied, not taking my eyes off of Mr. Uber Hotness.

"Don't say that," Sandra scolded. "Come on, stop staring at Oz. He's nothing… you only like him because of his tattoos."

"I do not!" I exclaimed, now glancing at her.

"Okay, his piercing."

"No." I said defensively. "I like him because he's great at Art. He's so unique, Sandra. We're both into art. Hello? We're meant for each other."

"Paul does art." Sandra smirked. "How about him?"

"Does he understand art?" I asked, just trying to find a reason to argue. I grinned at her, finally deciding to stop watching Oz. "Come on; go tell Paul to date Cassie."

"Cassie has Ben." Sandra said, rolling her eyes. She has these beautiful hazel eyes that radiates off of her caramel colored skin. She's very pretty and one of Cassie's good friends. That's how we met. I'm actually a junior, and she's a senior like Cassie.

Cassie is… well, she's the sort of 'popular' type. I'm not popular, but I'm accepted into the 'in' crowd just because I'm related to her. Cassie isn't even a cheerleader, but I think the reason she's so popular is because she plays like on almost… every team the school has. AND she's good at everything, so that pretty much made her known. (Hey I'd be known too if a new picture of me was plastered all over the school every week!) That and the fact that she's very pretty.

I didn't inherit her American standard good looks, but I wasn't considered ugly. Just… cute. We both had blonde hair and blue eyes, but her colors and features are exaggerated more. Dark, thick, blonde hair and cornflower blue eyes. Azure eyes. Sea kissed eyes. Whatever-you-wanna-call-it eyes. Full lips, thick lashes… the whole deal. And here I am, Plain Jane.

"I thought she broke up with him," I frowned. "She said they were having problems or something like that."

Sandra shrugged. "I saw them at the movies last night."

"Why can't we ever eat inside for a change?" Riley grumbled, coming up from behind us. I looked at her beadily. She sighed. "You see him enough, Riz. We see him everyday! Skipping one day cant hurt."

I ignored her comment. "Say 'ah'."

Riley grinned suddenly and opened her mouth. "Ahh."

I groaned. "I want that tongue ring!" I complained. "It's not fair. Why can't I have it?"

"You need a hole first," Sandra said, laughing. "You have enough ear piercing anyway. You don't need a tongue ring."

"Riley has one!" I cried. "She has same number of ear piercing as me and a tongue ring."

Riley stuck her tongue out, the spike ball at the tip of her tongue. "Too bad. I'm thinking of getting my labret pierced."

I scowled. "Don't you dare or I'll—"

"Just like your lover boy over there," she pointed to Oz, who was talking to his friend Stine about something. "He has his labret pierced."

I gasped. "I need one then! You can't get everything he has! I need to do that!"

"He wont notice you if you get every single piercing he has, Riz." Sandra said reasonably. "And Riley, are you sure you want to get that done?"

"Either that," Riley grinned at me. "Or an eyebrow bar."

I let out a shriek.

Sandra quickly clapped a hand over my mouth. "They're looking over here now." She said. "Thanks to you."

I quickly shrank against the stonewall, glaring at Riley. "No, get your belly pierced or something. Oz has an eyebrow piercing so you cant get it." I wailed. "You cant! Riley! How could you do this to me? You don't even like him! Don't get them pierced! Please, Rile. Please, please, please."

"Um—"Riley started.

"No!" I cut her off. "No eyebrow bars, okay? Please Riley? Maybe it'll look bad! No, no, don't get an eyebrow bar or your labret pierced. Get something feminine--or--or even get your ears pierced again! You don't need to have another piercing on your face--"

"Riz—" Sandra began.

"NO EYEBROW BARS OR LABRET PIERCING!" I yelled. "Geez, get your belly—" I suddenly noticed both of them gesturing behind me and felt my stomach drop to my knees. Don't tell me… no way, that would have been way too coincidental…. Oh god…

"And what's so wrong about eyebrow bars and labret piercing?" inquired the most beautiful voice which I have been dying to hear for ages. It was a little deep and throaty. Oh fack, it was sexiness.

I slowly turned around. And fainted. Okay, no I didn't faint, but I wanted to. I craned my neck to look up at his gorgeous face and smiled weakly. "Nothing. I'm just saying that… that…she--that she shouldn't… because…" I gestured helplessly in Riley's and Sandra's direction, both whom were silently watching, equally powerless.

"Forget them, Oz." Stine, Oz's best, best friend, rarely ever seen without him spoke, disgust and impatience lacing his words. "They're not worth your damn time. Let's get the hell out of here."

My mouth hung wordlessly as they passed by, Oz sliding back into his absent demeanor, and Stine darkly scowling. The minute they were out of earshot I whirled around to face my friends.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I cried. "This is the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to me! I want to die." I buried my head in my hands. "Now Oz thinks I hate him."

"He's such a jerk!" Sandra grinded her teeth. "And that stupid green haired friend of his is worst. What do you see in guys like that?! They're such junkies, I swear. You're crazy, Riz. Utterly, and completely crazy. And that green haired freak. What is his problem? "

Riley had her mouth shut, but I could tell she was toying with that stupid tongue ring I wanted. Grrrr, life was so unfair! "I'm getting my tongue and labret pierced if it's the last thing I do!" I declared. "Then he'll know I don't hate his piercing… yes, that's the only way…" I let out a squeal of delight feeling energized all over again.

Sandra made a face and stood up. "I give up! Rile, you deal with her. I gotta go or I'm gonna be late for gym," she waved and headed inside.

"We'll go together…" I told Riley, absentmindedly waving back to Sandra, already planning. "We'll take… we'll take your mom with us!"

Riley shook her head. "You know what she's going to say. She'll want your parents' permission first."

I let out a groan. "Then… then we'll take Louis!" I cried, jumping to my feet. "He'll take us right?" Louis was Riley's older brother.

"Um, Riz… he's at college."

"Fine! You pretend to be my mom, and just tell them you have no sort of ID and don't drive!" I folded my arms fuming.

Riley gave me a look.


"Don't press on it, Charisse." Luann scolded. "Just slice it. Don't place any pressure or you'll mess up the tomato."

"Sorry." I mumbled, pushing my glasses up. I wasn't wearing my contacts because my eyes started getting all red for some reason. Luann, my stepmother sighed and continued chopping the lettuce. I don't know why I couldn't chop the lettuce. Why did I have to dice tomatoes while she easily chopped away on lettuce? I'll tell you why; because she hates me. She loves making me do more work. She loves watching me suffer.

Well not really… but she must hate me if she agreed with my father that I shouldn't get my tongue pierced! She could have tried to convince my dad that a tongue ring was okay to have, and sporting one didn't make you look dangerous, as my father says.

"What's the point of it?" he had demanded impatiently.

"There is no point," I said. "It's just… cool… please can I get one?"

"Does it help you in any way?"


"Does it benefit you in any way?"

"No… but—"

"Does it serve an exemplary purpose?"





Geez. You couldn't even see it! All I had to do was keep my mouth closed whenever I was around my father, which isn't a lot. I only see him at dinner time, and the holidays. Both him and Luann were prime lawyers. They see all kinds of people everyday as they say. And whenever someone with a lot of piercing come for trial, they seem to always be the convict.

So naturally, their dislike for piercing is expected. But still… just because I want a tongue ring doesn't mean I want to end up in court and be sent off to jail or something. They should know me better than that.

Anyway, tonight me and Riley were going to go to some small tattoo parlor and get my tongue pierced. Yes we were, and no one was going to stop us. Unless of course, the dudes who work there don't believe she's my mom, and I honestly wouldn't blame them. We looked completely different. Our hair were totally opposite, so were our eyes, and even our skin. She's more tan and has the definite Mexican in her.

Oh well, it was worth a try.

"How was your trig test?" My father, Charles Dently asked sharply at dinner. "Do you know if you passed?"

"I… I think—"I changed my mind. "Yes, of course. Why wouldn't I?"

He nodded, satisfied. "Do you have it with you?"

I swallowed mentally. "Er, no… Mr. Lewinsky just sort of… told me… I… I passed." I said meekly.

Luann looked at me from where she sat and raised an eyebrow. "You have any homework?"

"No," I said promptly. "I finished most of it in Study Hall and—and at lunch time."

"Most of it?" my father echoed.

"All of it." I corrected.

Both my father and Luann exchanged contented looks and nodded. "Good. Did you help your mother with dinner?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good." He said yet again.

I bit my lip. "Um, dad? Riley is going to have her trig test tomorrow and I was wondering if I could… go over to her uh, house and help her? I'll probably only be gone an hour the most."

My father frowned. "It's a school night."

"I know, but dad… I have to help her. She's my best friend."

Luann cleared her throat. "I see no problem in that, Charlie." Thank you! I silently sighed with relief. My father really adores her, so I knew he would agree. I felt like jumping when he heavily sighed. "Oh, alright. Do I have to drop you?"

"No," I said quickly. "She's coming to pick me up."

My father frowned again suspiciously. "Why? You're going over to her house. Why should she come pick you up?"

I laughed easily. "Because dad. She'll do anything for her best friend." I smiled sweetly at him before happily finishing my dinner.


"What is that?" I demanded. "What on earth are you wearing?"

Riley glared at me. "I happen to be wearing my mothers' clothes. I am supposed to be your mother, aren't I?" She backed out of the driveway, muttering; "I will die if anyone sees us."

I grinned at her. "No one will. That tattoo shop is so small and dirty no one from school would want to go there. Anyway… do you have any idea what we're going to say?"

"Yes. This is my daughter, she wants a tongue ring, I have no ID, and I do not drive." Riley recited.

I giggled nervously. "You have to make it sound more believable than that, Rile. You're so… blunt."

"Why thank you."

I was a nervous wreck by the time we reached the tattoo parlor and I could tell Riley was feeling a bit hesitant. "We can do this," I encouraged. "And anyway, if they don't believe us we'll just be like; 'Okay, whatever.' And leave. I mean, its not like we'll ever see these people again, right?"

Riley nodded. "Okay… should… should I have an accent or something?"

"Yes." I said immediately, not really thinking, and taking in the tattoo shop, awed. "Yes, I'll try to have an accent too." Riley rolled her eyes and slowly pulled the door open to the dingy tattoo shop. We nervously stepped inside, looking around cautiously. I looked at the guy behind the counter and my eyes widened.

He had a tattoo on his head. He had two nose rings, he had about four lip rings, one bar and ring around each eyebrow, one large black earring on each ear and… I'm guessing his tongue was pierced too. Maybe like, ten times?

He must have caught me staring because he looked at us and raised an eyebrow. "Can I help you?"

"Y-yes um, I'm here with my mom to get my tongue pierced." I said, totally forgetting about my accent. The guy raised both eyebrows and inspected Riley disbelievingly.

"Your mom?" he echoed, looking her up and down.

Riley raised her chin defiantly. "Can we please get her tongue pierced?" she asked, masking her voice and trying to sound more grown up-ish. I frankly thought she did quite a good job. Unfortunately…

"Uh, I'll need your ID, verifying that you are over 18." There was a slight edge in his tone and he smirked a little.

"She doesn't drive," I said quickly.

"Oh really?" he sounded bored.

"Yes really, she doesn't drive or have any ID. But she's my mom and she says I can get a tongue ring!" I was getting desperate by now. I needed that tongue ring. Didn't he understand? Oz had a tongue ring. I needed one too.

"Sorry," the guy shrugged. "Unless you can present an ID, I can't allow you to get any part of your body pierced."

"Please?" I begged. "We'll pay double the price!"

He smirked. "Sorry."

I groaned. "My friend Riley got one! She got it with her 21 year old brother and didn't even ask her mom. Her mom didn't even care! Riley, show him your tongue ring."

Riley stared at me, eyes wide.

The guy behind the counter burst into laughter. "Your mom is your friend too, huh? Right. Listen, why don't you kids just go and come back with someone who is over 18?" he laughed under his breath. "Kids."

"It was worth the try, Riz." Riley said thirty minutes later when we were back in her car. "It's okay… you can get one in two years, when you're eighteen."

"Oz will be gone by then!" I wailed. "He'll be off to college and will probably be… be married by then!" I let out an unhappy sigh. "This is so terrible."

Riley wrinkled her nose. "Um, I don't think so. You seem to be the only one who likes him."

"Cassie thinks he's hot." I mumbled.

"Does she?" Riley asked interestedly. "Since when was she into bums?"

"He is not a bum!" I said hotly.

"She's older than he is."

"So? Just by one year."


She started her car and drove out the empty parking lot while I drowned in misery. It was only 8: 25 and my parents didn't expect me until 9. I slumped even lower in my seat and sighed. I'd just have to find another way of getting Oz's attention. Maybe I should get a tattoo… but they probably ask for an ID too… yes, they probably did. This was really one of the saddest days of my life. If I didn't get a tongue ring, Oz would think I'd hate him forever, since he already did think that I disliked body piercing. The tongue ring was the only—

Riley suddenly braked, causing me to fly forward (I didn't have my seat belt on) and bang my head on the dashboard.

"Oww!" I complained. "There's no traffic light, Rile. What the hell?"

She looked at me, eyes lighting up excitedly. "Cassie."

"What about her." I grumbled, rubbing my forehead.

Riley looked at me with disbelief. "Cassie happens to be 18."

I stared at her, confused at first. "So? She just turned 18 two weeks—OH MY GOD!" I screamed. "Find a phone booth!" (Neither of us had cell phones, as pathetic as it may sound). "You're right! Oh my god… she has to help us! Yes! You're a genius, Rile!"

Ten minutes later finds us standing together next to a public phone inside of Texaco. The phone rang four times before being picked up by my Aunt Cecelia. We exchanged brief 'how are you' before I quickly asked for Cassie.

"Hello? Charisse?"

"Cassie!" I squealed. "Hey, how are you?"

"Uh, why are you calling?" She can be really rude sometime.

"Because, I want to know how you're doing." I sang.

"Charisse, can we please talk tomorrow? I need my beauty sleep if I'm going to run another mile tomorrow and—"

"Cassie, listen." I cut her off. "Can you please do me a big favor?"

I heard her sigh on the other end. "What is it now?"

"Will you do it?"

"Depends," came her skeptical tone.

I quickly blurted out our plan, and asked her to contribute her beautiful license for my sake.

"Charisse." Cassie said when I had finished. "What will your dad say if he finds out, which he eventually will."

"I wont tell him you took me. I'll tell him Riley did. Please?"

It took longer than we thought, to convince my older cousin, but in the end, she finally gave in. She made me promise to tell my dad that if he ever found out about my tongue ring, I would tell him that Riley took me. Of course I agreed.

Look out Oz, cuz there's a new Riz in town.

A/N: I know this story is cliché, and the main character is a bit shallow, but just keep reading. I promise it gets better. The first few chapters are terrible, but the story progresses like… in a few more chapters. Promise! Thanks so muchh for reading, I heart all of your reviews.