One Small Meaning

You say "I love you" and I draw a blank
Frozen by a past relationship's mistake
Is this all it is? Give and take
If I give you my heart and you take it,
will you take it for granted and give it away to break?

I didn't say it for your own sake, I feel it's sacred
"Fuck you" you say, how can you sleep with me at night naked
But I didn't tell you the nights I stayed awake trying to believe you;
I've heard those words before, how can I be sure you won't leave the same
heart aching

There was another, I remember we called each other soul mates
We'd be this way forever and share our own fates
But our bonds severed, we never spent forever together I remember that cold
How could I forget; moments of regret; how we transgressed from love to
known hate

The "friends" she chose over me left her soon after
Tragic disaster; but I'd never make amends, she had stolen my laughter

We loved each other though, love beyond our lovemaking
And now you say you love me too, love beyond and above faking
How do I know you're not like them, dropping my love and watch it breaking

So I'll choose my words controlled like every breath since taken
I use "I love you" like swords; don't make me cut the arms I want to escape