Roseview Saga: Atypical Tendencies

Mercuria: Um, hello. Welcome to the extremely belated second season of Roseview Saga, where the new motto of Tafadhali and myself is, "You can't put a deadline on ART."

Disclaimer: This is ours. All of it. The characters, the locations, and (for the most part) the locations and plot devices. We love and encourage fanfiction; lay it on us!


Chapter One: It's All the Rage in France


The famous Roseview Academy. Renowned for its many students who have gone on to attend prestigious and exclusive colleges; as well as those who have attended slightly less prestigious and exclusive colleges, and even those who went on to work at fast-food restaurants. It is in this community, isolated in upstate New York, that the future of a student can be built or destroyed. Here, the academic challenges are only outweighed by the moralistic ones, and the students cheerfully rise to both, determined to successfully move forward in life.

"Dammit, math sucks. I'll have to cheat off Benny this year."

Exhibit A: Juliet Greene. A junior at this fine educational facility. Beloved by several but known by ALL, she is one of Roseview's leaders.

"Hey, Magic Marker, are you gonna get laid this year?"

Only, you know, in a weird kind of way.

"Greene!" growled the indignant (and rightfully so) Mark Rogers. "Can you at least ACT like a normal human being for ONE day? For an hour, even!"

"Normal is for the weak."

"Grr ..."

"Um ... is this seat taken?"

Ah, behold the New Kid. Dressed in her finest jeans and t-shirt, she stood in the aisle betwixt the battling forces of Rogers and Greene. The seat that she indicated was next to Mark, which to him displayed considerable intellectual prowess on her part.

"Er, no, you can sit here," Mark said, tossing his backpack to the floor.

"You new?" Juliet inquired brightly.

The girl nodded as she sat, something which looks rather silly on a shuttle, as said vehicles have a tendency to bounce on back roads such as the one currently being traveled. The overall impression is that of a spastic bobble-head toy.

"Yeah," she said, putting her backpack down. "My name's Felicia. You guys are ...?"

"I know a Felicia!" Juliet exclaimed, ignoring Felicia's question.

"No you don't," Mark countered.

Juliet pouted. "Yes I do! I know her vicariously through Jack!"

"Hey, I know a Jack ..." Felicia said thoughtfully.

"Maybe we know the SAME Jack!" Juliet said.

"Because Jack isn't a common name at ALL, no, not a bit," Mark interjected sarcastically.

Juliet and Felicia ignored him, sizing each other up as if gauging the Aura of Jack that might be clinging to them.

"So," Juliet said, "you're from ..."

"New Jersey," Felicia replied.

"And this Jack you know," Felicia said. "He's ..."

"Gay!" Juliet chirped.

Felicia nodded. "Right."

And you have ... tyrannical grandparents?" Juliet said, trying to remember what Jack had told her.

Felicia smiled. "Not anymo-ore!"

Mark blinked. "I'm, um, happy for you?"

Felicia and Juliet weren't listening.

"Wow, you're Juliet!" Felicia said, giving her a hug. She paused. "Or Melissa ..."

"No, she's definitely Juliet," Mark said quickly.

"Oh," Felicia said. "Okay. And that'd make you ... Benny?"

Juliet snickered. Mark nearly choked.

"I'm MARK," he said, sounding pained.

"Sorry," Felicia said. "Mark, then."


"Welcome back- and welcome for the first time- to all new and returning Roseview students!" Dr. Huxley was saying from his brand-new podium, grinning desperately.

"Does Jack know that Felicia's here?" Mark wanted to know.

"I can tell that we're going to have a great year," Huxley continued nervously.

"JACK?" Felicia yelled from one side of the assembly hall. On the other side, Jack leapt to his feet.

"FELICIA!" he cried.

"He does now," Juliet told Mark.


"Sit down, Jack," Benny said, tugging at his sleeve.

"Um, if you all wouldn't mind settling down," Dr. Huxley suggested. "I know that it's always exciting to reunite with a friend-"

"I'M SO GLAD I RAN INTO YOU!" Felicia shouted.

"Really, I have a bit of news-" Here Huxley gulped. "-that I had meant to put off until after an inspiring and cheering speech about the new school year ... but now I find that we really must press on ..."

Huxley gulped again. Jack and Felicia appeared to be finished, so he wiped his brow and continued.

"Now, there come times in all our lives when we are forced to hear things that we wish were not true. I know that it is with great trepidation and anxiety that I inform you- and furthermore, with great-"

"Oh get on with it, Judas!" Mr. Potts shouted from the back of the hall.

Dr. Huxley looked paler than anyone could ever remember him being.

"The Board of Trustees is coming here next week," he whispered, before fainting. His podium, unable to support his weight, collapsed.

"We really ought to get a deputy headmaster," Ms. Danielson observed.

Ms. Goodfellow, Roseview's sole drama teacher, stalked up the aisle and onto the stage with a snarl.

"Do you filthy brats have any announcements?" she demanded.

"OOH! OOH!" Juliet cried. "Pick me!"

Not waiting for an answer, Juliet leapt onstage, followed by Melissa, Grace, Emma, Judy, and- somewhat less enthusiastically- Benny.

"Greetings, fashion victims!" Juliet cried, neatly sidestepping her fallen principal (whom Emma was regarding with some concern). "I'd like to take this opportunity to demonstrate some of this season's hottest fashions, aided by my wonderfully cooperative models!"

Melissa skipped down the aisle, eliciting thunderous applause.

"Melissa is modeling the latest in tweed!" Juliet announced. "If you don't wear tweed, you're missing out!"

Emma was next; she flounced down the aisle, proudly displaying the pink felt triangles sewn onto her jacket. The rest of the GBSA cheered heartily; except Mary, who found it slightly unnerving.

"Emma's ... brightly decorated leather jacket ... represents the diversity of the material. Don't be afraid to express yourself this season, no matter WHAT you're wearing!"

Grace would have followed the GBSA leader, but one look out at the crowd of students made her lose her nerve, and she fled through the side door.

Juliet blinked.

"Er, that WOULD have been Grace in a black vinyl jumpsuit, but she appears to be incapacitated. So let's move on to Judy, who is wearing much less than she usually does!"

Judy's bikini was a great hit with the heterosexual male, lesbian female, and generally bisexual population of Roseview Academy. She didn't quite know what to do with all of the attention she was receiving, however, and contented herself by half-glaring, half-chuckling.

"Thank you, Judy! And now, last but not least ... Benny, get out here!"

"I've changed my mind!" Benny yelled from backstage.

Juliet sighed. "I'll tell everyone about the silly string, Benny."

"... Bitch."

Glaring, Benny inched out from behind the curtain, then broke into a run.

"And Benny, modeling a lovely polka-dotted gown that would doubtless look much better if he had breasts!"

"Jack, I'll KILL you," Benny vowed from behind the assembly hall door. "You TOLD her about the silly string?!"

Jack slouched in his seat.

"And there you have it!" Juliet declared, smiling. "Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, and until next time, NEVER wear orange with purple."

"SIT down, Ms. Greene!" the faculty chorused.


"So what's so bad about the Board of Trustees?" Felicia asked Jill, whom she had met just an hour earlier and was already bonding with due to their mutual love of Rent.

"Well, no one really knows," Jill admitted, fluffing up a pillow that she'd brought from home and setting it at the head of her bed. "When Headmaster Cognito ran the school, we'd hear about them from time to time ... but we never saw them."

"Interesting," Felicia said. Her trunk was at the foot of her bed, but she had yet to unpack. "Hey, do we get to see the other people in our dorm, or do we only interact with the girls in our area?"

"Oh, we hang out with everybody," Jill assured her. "I know the partition thing might seem pretty weird, but it's just for privacy. You saw our common area, right?"


Felicia blinked. "Is that ... Juliet?"

Jill winced. "Yup."


"Yay, I'm in Mel's dorm!" Juliet sang out.

"I guess that hasn't happened in awhile," Melissa said thoughtfully.

"We're going to have so much FUN," Juliet said with a grin.

"Oh dear."

Meanwhile, Mark was the impatient witness to a tearful farewell.

"I'll write to you EVERY DAY," Jack promised.

"It's okay ... we've just got to be strong," Benny said, not appearing to hear him. "We'll get through this."

Mark rolled his eyes.

"Guys, I know being more than twenty yards away from each other is difficult for you ..." he began caustically.



"Come ON, Jack," Mark snapped, trying to pry him off of Benny.

"I'll never let go, Jack!" cried Benny.

"That was in poor taste," Juliet informed him as she shoved one of her many large suitcases through the door of Garnet Wing. "Besides, aren't you pissed at him for making you wear that dress?"

Benny paused.

"Hey, that's right!" he exclaimed, pushing Jack away from him and picking up his bags. "Have fun in Amethyst Hall, Jack."

Jack whirled on Juliet, who quickly leapt inside her dorm room.


"You can't come in here, Jack!" Juliet screeched. "Girls only!"


"Quick, Melissa, help me shove the couch against the door!"

Ah, Roseview. It's been too long.


Mercuria: God, it's late. Sorry guys. And it's also late at night, which makes Merc an unhappy camper.

Note: The reference to partitions just means that although there are upwards of twenty people per dorm room, the rooms are HUGE and are divided into little areas with wall partitions. So really, you get a certain amount of space that you share with two to three people, and THAT'S your room. (Sorry if that made no sense.)