Ex Mechina

By: Nikki A.K.A WalkingOnWater
Started: 11-21-03

Chapter 1
Recoil

A sea of earthly emotions consumed me, worldly, horridly, relishing in a pot of boiling rage. A shaking fist did fall to my side, clenched and sweating, blissful sweat, sweetly clinging to my burning skin. I only knew of the one great prelude to every story existing in this world, a gasping swarm of exempt creations in time. The crimes of human intentions, the compassion in mans serenade. But now.now it all made sense to me. The atoms, the cells, the flesh within my body burned and denounced all lasting energy. Only I knew why, only I knew the reason for corroding damnations clinging to my weak body.

It poured into me, the midnight sun, like silk, like cream. My aching throat gave way to groans and hisses. Retorting, my face, revolting as it may have seemed, sneered in rage. Teeth clenched, eyebrows knitted together as hot sweat rolled down my brow.

"Amaru."

I did nothing.

"Amaru!"

Still, I did nothing.

"Amaru! Snap out of it!"

A sudden shrill squeal escaped my lips as a lingering slap hit my cheek.

"What?!" I cried out, grabbing the hand that which violated my thoughts.

"Day dreaming again? What's gotten into you? You're sweating, and growling like you were some wild beast! Are you alright?"

A few retreating thoughts went back into the bolls of my mind as I stared at the face, clearly, yet slowly, I finally recognized what I'd been doing.

"Oh.I just.I mean.agh." I groaned, running my clammy hand down my face, "Sorry, Akemi."

"Of course you're sorry, like the time before that, and the time before that. Before you know it you're going to go crazy and end up in a psych- ward!" Akemi prodded my nose with her finger

I reeled back from her, leaning on my elbows against the chair behind me.

"It just happens.Akemi, it's like someone's calling me." I wearily admitted, knowing full well she'd have a go at me for that one too.

"Calling you? Like what.aliens? Amaru, I swear." She gibed at me.

"It sounds stupid, I realize that, but.its true. Not calling my name, or anything like that.but, a calling, these dreams are like messages." I went on, preparing myself for more blows.

"Amaru." she turned her head a bit, inhaling deeply through her nose, "I don't want to sound like the bad guy, but you really need to stop with these silly stories."

My nostrils flared, and in an instant my insane, uncontrollable rage consumed me.

"Stories?! Is that all they are! I'll tell you what they are, Akemi," I leaned in, my lips pursed, my breathing quickening. I could just feel the blood rushing to my face, "they're messages! Don't believe me, I don't care, because all you do, you stupid bitch, is give me a hard time about everything I say or do!" I pushed her back into her chair, rising to my feet. Her eyes were wide with fear and wonder, she stared and gaped at me.

"Don't look at me like that, you may be my girlfriend, but you sure act more like my shrink than anything." I stared at her, distantly, not like I was seeing her, but seeing inside of her.

"Amaru.I." She tried to understand, to speak, but stopped.

"I'm sorry, Akemi." I turned; my gaze lingered on her grief-stricken expression, as if I'd just killed her mother or something. Rubbing my nose, a nervous habit I tended to have, I finally stormed out of the room as quickly as I could, yet, as gently as I could.

I feared myself now. I listened to the echoing of my footsteps as I half jogged down the hall. I couldn't stop it, this anger, these messages. My legs quickened, my hair, jagged and spiked, began to be swept back as I pounded down the hall to the front doorway, flinging open the door and slamming it behind me.

I stopped; the gentle evening breeze caressed my face. I could feel the warmth, the sun kissing the horizon. Tears began to swell up into my eyes, I could feel the burning, the need to cry. I refused to blink, the tears blurred my vision, and if I blinked they would run down my cheeks.

"No." I murmured to myself, wiping aggressively at my eyes, "please.no.."

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E/N: confusing? It should be, for it has not even begun.