(2/04) Okay, that was pretty good! I'm really excited about this chapter . he he . this should be good!

Thanks to Vane, who edited this chapter!!!!

Author's Notes:

1 - Alright . again . I mean to offend no one!!!

2 - Exams suck.

3 - There shall be a lot of weirdness in this chapter so … just be prepared and please know that that I know that normal people do not behave like the characters introduced in this chapter.

4 - I like cotton.

5 - Chrno Crusade rox my sox!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~*~*~*~

There are some people out there who are one of a kind; unique in their own personal way. But then there are others who should be avoided at all cost (and put on Valium and placed in a loony house). I have found that there are many people at this camp who meet both descriptions; especially the ones who try to abduct you or the ones that try to poison you on a daily basis.

You see … this is how it happened:

I had been sleeping, and having a very lovely dream - I think I was running for president and Brittany Spears wanted to give up her ways and give me all her money to become a Buddhist - however, I was awakened very abruptly and very rudely. Well, at least I probably seemed rude to Alesha when I was shot straight forward into her. The train had stopped very quickly therefore science made it move … darn that science; it hates me .

"What are you doing Elizabeth?" Alesha asked.

"Cursing science and everybody who contributed to it." I replied as I lifted my head.

"Alright ..." Alesha then stood up and pulled out a huge bag from above her seat; Vanessa and Ereleth got their bags too.

I too started to pick up my bag but found myself going backwards instead of forwards. The weight from my backpack proved to be more of a challenge then I first thought. But seriously, why the heck is my backpack so freakin' heavy? The heaviest thing I put in it was my shampoo and conditioner bottles and maybe my CD case. My brother probably slipped a brick or a jar of bugs or something in my backpack … he did it when I went to high school for the first time … at least those cheerleaders ran around screaming when the lice got into their hair ... You know .... you've just got to wonder how those lice got out of the jar ..

I followed the three out and dodged between people coming out of their compartments. I noticed that there weren't too many people ... just a lot of cubby or over-sized people. The three led me to the exit and it was a relief; once I was outside, out of the stuffy train, I took a deep breath of air and then began to walk towards the group, who had stopped.

However, it seemed fate had another plan for me.

If I haven't said it before... I am a total klutz. Sure I have this elegance thing about me but sometimes I tend to trip on air.

. But my question is: why? Why must I be a klutz? And why does it seem that someone up there hates me?

Because I had to meet Will Wilson.

Like I was saying, I was walking along - minding my own business - when all of a sudden a person topples over me because they tripped on a rock.

Well, I was on the ground with a somewhat heavier-than-I person on top of me (maybe around 140 lbs.). I would have just picked myself up and muttered an "Excuse me, sorry" but then I felt a pair of arms around me.

Well ... it might just be me, but when people trip over you, are they supposed to grasp you in their arms and cuddle with you? Especially when they're a perfect stranger?

I guess it is just me because I have found myself in this situation.

"I am in love!" The person grasping me proclaimed.

I looked up at my captor and saw a bright brown eyed eighteen years old (I'm guessing) with a head of brown hair. He was smiling like an idiot; he was obviously proud that he had traumatized me for the rest of my life (trust me ... this is traumatizing).

I was in a bit of a daze; I am in the arms of a stranger that had just proclaimed his love to me after he tripped over me (is this normal? I think not!).

"Such radiance, such elegance," he went on, "I will love you till the end of my days, I will - "

"GET 'OFFA ME!" I finally got out of my daze and yelled at the top of my lungs.

"And your voice is like angels singing in a choir!" the psycho continued.

"You'll be singing too if you don't let go of me." I said through gritted teeth (also if you didn't get the message ... good, you're not perverted).

I tried to push him away but my arms were clasped to my side. Maybe if I screamed I could get some help … but then again I sensed all the people around me looking at this freak.

"Falling in love with innocent bystanders, uh Will?" A new voice said. "This is an all time low for you."

The guy (Will) looked up and so did I. I kind of regret it now (looking up) because my first impression of the new guy was that he was bright (his head blocked the sun) and his eyes were an awesome amber that reminded me of honey and his hair was white like fresh snow.

And I couldn't stop staring.

I mean it; the guy was hot. I mean, if I licked my finger and touched him (God-permitting) it would steam!

Suddenly, I found myself plummeting to the ground; Mr. Hottie had just punched Mr. Psycho (Will) who was now unconscious on the ground.

10 points for Mr. Hottie!!!!

I sound like a ditz.

But that's okay … because I'm really happy right now; I have just been saved by my knight in shining armor and now he's going to whisk me off my feet and take me away from fat camp so that he can lavish me in diamonds and tell me how beautiful I am.

However (this really breaks my heart), as soon as he comes and offers his hand to take me away with (pick up) he suddenly withdraws my hand and I fall to the ground once more (I had taken the hand).

I was between offended and surprised; was my hand not hot enough to be graced by his touch? Or was it that I had some sort of invisible spider on my hand that only he can see and he deadly phobia of spiders because his brother poured some on his head when he was a child while he was asleep and ...

I'm rambling.

Anyway, I found myself on the ground (again) and I looked up not to see a face of sorry but a face of anger … and I don't really like it because he looks really angry and I'm starting to feel uncomfortable.

"How dare you show your face here?" The former-Mr. Hottie yelled at me.

I gathered myself up and brushed some dirt off of my cargo pants and then looked levelly ... at his chest (darn it ... I hate it when my enemies are taller than me). I looked up at his face and then I started calmly explaining why I am showing my face here.

"You see, when you are born, you have a chemical make-up that determines what you look like and what you will look like in a certain amount of years. My chemical make-up made my face look like this at this point in my life. And the reason why my pre-determined-face is here is because I am being forced to go here. Does that answer your question?"

"Don't talk to me like I'm stupid Eithene." The guy hissed.

"Oh," I said actually surprised, "you must be mistaken, because my name isn't -"

"I can't believe you have the nerve to even look at me after what you did."

"But you see, my name isn't -"

"I can't believe you, you slut."

"Yet again, my name - what did you just call me?" He just called me a 'slut' and he doesn't even know me!!!!! (Plus, I'm wearing a baggy t-shirt and cargo pants, the jerk)

"A slut." He stated plainly.

"I -" I couldn't say anything. All I knew was that I had just been insulted by a total stranger and that my hand was twitching to smack him.

And I was about to slap him until a strong hand placed itself on my wrist and squeezed; it wasn't painful, it was just suppressing my urge. I looked to my side and saw the tall 5'11 Ereleth beside me with her normally passive face. She was looking at the guy with some annoyance, as if she had to deal with a whiny child.

Ereleth sighed and closed her eyes (she really must be annoyed). When she opened her eyes she simply shook her head at the guy and muttered, "You moron."

"Come on." She said to me and I found myself being dragged away.

~*~*~*~

Three minutes later, after hiking up a small mountain and then passing a bunch of camp-like buildings, I stood under a tree with the still passive Ereleth. I was thankful for the move Ereleth made because I knew that I would have snapped if I hadn't been brought away.

"Okay, can I talk now?" I asked, voice rising.

Ereleth nodded.

"Who the heck was that?" I exploded, "He didn't even know me, but he went and insulted me! Plus, he kept on saying I was this Eithene person who I've never even heard of!"

Ereleth stood silently while I vented and directed my anger towards that guy, science, even that rock over there; they all mocked me and I was mad.

"You'll have to excuse Wolf." Ereleth said quietly. I looked up at her at the name she gave him, "Yes, that's his name; don't ask. He assumed that you were someone that did something very bad to him."

"Why?" This wasn't making sense.

"Because, no matter how much I don't like it, you look exactly like the girl."

"No one can look exactly like another person unless evil twins and cloning humans exist." I said, thinking very rationally.

In return, Ereleth simply rolled her eyes. "Look, just avoid him as much as possible; hopefully you won't have any activities with him."

"You mean they let the guys do the weight-loss-thingy-activities with the girls?" I asked.

"Yes, but only in activities such as athletics; stretching and counseling are normally left to the girls." Ereleth explained. "Now, you go on to the cafeteria and get some dinner. You'll find out which cabin you're staying in very soon."

"I'm still not happy." I commented.

Ereleth simply smiled and turned on her heel to go do some secret-counselor (cult)-type-things (I'm presuming).

I was about to turn and go towards the cafeteria (a huge brick building with smoke coming out of it) but then I noticed where I actually was. Not since I was six have I seen such a beautiful sight … mountains rolled lazily below the setting sun that highlighted the many trees of the forest below. I also noticed that below me there was the town where our train had come in at. When I looked at how small it was and then thought of Chicago, I was quite amazed that a town could be so small. I mean - -

An acorn just hit me … smack dab in the middle of my head.

I turned around, expecting that Wolf guy just trying to annoy me … or even Will (getting my attention with an acorn that could possibly knock me out isn't a good idea).

But instead of seeing a laughing-little-(READ: tall)-annoying-boy laughing his head off or another with little hearts leaking out of his eyes, I saw many pairs of red eyes staring out at me. I started to panic, thinking they were blood sucking bats that had just come out (remember, it's dusk) but instead, I saw that they were not in fact blood-sucking bats … but foaming- at-the-mouth squirrels.



I ran away.

And I got hit with about sixteen more acorns (I counted).

~*~*~*~

With a few small bumps on my head, the satisfaction from knocking out a squirrel with one of the stupid acorns, and a rumbling belly, I went to the building of food (cafeteria.).

It seemed very simple: get in line, get food, and get thin (I guessed that all of the food was healthy and had some chemical that is supposed to kill fat cells). Carts of health food lined the walls with a bunch of tables and chairs (super-sized of course) were in the middle. I began to go through the line everybody else was going through but I saw a cart of food that caught my attention. Upon further inspection I found that it was for the counselors and trainers and such. I also saw that it was not health food but nice, normal food ...

Like HAMBURGERS!!!!!

It was so unfair; so very unfair, I thought as I went over to the cart that had most likely been donated by Slim-Fast.

After grabbing a tray and a plate I scooped up some edible-looking food and plopped it onto my plate.

I had to fight back a wave of nausea.

The cart for drinks looked somewhat normal for both trainers and campers went to it. I walked over and grabbed a diet soda and got a glass of water and put the two on my tray. There was a guy next to me at the cart and I guessed he was a trainer for he was one of the thin people.

I was about to turn and leave but at that moment I felt a pair of arms wrap themselves around my stomach. My body involuntarily jumped and my tray of food went flying. I turned around in the arms and saw that it was Will who had grabbed me. He was also blabbing on about some 'eternal love' but I wasn't paying attention for I was grabbing a tray from the counter of the cart nearby and whacking him over the head with it. The sound of the tray and food caught my attention for a moment but I preoccupied myself again with the beating-of-the-head-of-Will.

However, I did notice when I felt some moisture at my back. I turned around wearily and then I suddenly jumped back.

The guy that was standing next to me before was steaming from the water that had been on my tray that had landed on him.



No, I do not take medication but I swear that he was steaming .

And looking very angry with me.

"Um ..." I mumbled.

But before I had the chance to apologize, he went off stomping.

I tried to follow him but I felt a hand wrap itself around my ankle. This time I screamed and then I stomped on Will's head until he went unconscious and let go of my ankle.

"Hey," I yelled. I knew it was no use because the guy who was steaming had already left. "I'm sorry!"

I stood there a bit dazed for a minute; the guy had steamed for Buyo's sake {Instead of Christ I use Buyo (my cat) so get used to it}.

Then I found that the whole cafeteria was starting at me and the corpse - - I mean unconscious person next to me. An uneasy smile came across my face and I nudged Will away from me with my foot. I then went back to the food cart and got some food, still aware of the beady eyes following me.

After the hectic - nice dinner, I went outside and saw a group of people with their bags around some counselors and trainers who were calling out names and numbers.

"Bailey, Anna; you're cabin two!"

"Davis, Eva; Cabin three."

A few more names were called out before they got to about six 'Jones'.

"Jones, Elizabeth; Cabin three."

I began to walk towards the cabins. They were fairly nice looking cabins; not the log kind that I had at girl scouts one year that had a nest of spiders' in-between the logs that made up the walls. Of course, I wasn't afraid of spiders so I had to usher all the girls out before they all hyperventilated. Later, I got a made-up badge that was the "Dark Spider Destroyer" badge or something. Anyway, the cabins were nice; they were more like small buildings but they still were the campy-feely types.

At cabin three I found Vanessa and Alesha waiting outside. They smiled as I walked up to them.

"Are you in cabin three?" Vanessa asked me.

I nodded and then Alesha pounced on me.

"Yah!!! This is going to be great!" Alesha yelled as she hugged me. "Wecanstayuplateandtalkaboutcoolstufflikemoviesandallsortsofstuffthatisimprotanttogirlslikeusand - "

I blocked Alesha's voice from my mind and focused on Vanessa who was saying how happy she was in a nice, safe, quiet voice.

Eventually, Alesha let go of me and they walked me into the cabin. I laid my stuff down on a top bunk and looked around. The cabin was like a middle- class house; the bunks were actually made with oak wood and not that cheap metal stuff and the walls were painted a nice cream-ish color.

I then noticed someone staring at me. I turned to look at Alesha and Vanessa but they were busy unpacking and talking to other people bunking with us.

It was then I looked up to a bunk right next to mine. From above a girl about my age was staring down at me.

"What are you doing here?" She asked. Her tone informed me that she was not happy by my presence here . well, I wasn't very happy by my presence here either so I, in return, was rude.

"I'm here because my mother is crazy and because she thinks I am fat." I almost yelled. "And I've been abducted by retarded guys named Will, been saved and then dropped to the floor by someone by the name of an animal, plus I made some guy steam because I accidentally spilled my water on him when Will came up behind me and grabbed me!!"

The girl just stared at me for a moment. It took her a couple of seconds to reply, "So ... you're not Eithene?"

"NO!!!!!!!!" I yelled at the top of my lungs.

"Oh, okay." The girl said. She then smiled and held out her hand and I shook it, "My name's Eva Davis."

"Elizabeth Jones." I replied. I looked very closely at Eva's face. She had very bright blue eyes, almost an electric blue ... but to contrast against her eyes, her hair was a raven black and down to her shoulders. I then noticed that she reminded me a lot of Spencer.

"Hey," I started, "Are you related to Spencer?"

Eva's smile disappeared immediately, replaced by a scrowl, "Yes," she muttered. "But I'm not very proud of it, the jerk."

"How are you related?"

"He's my cousin." Eva sighed. "My only one but I still hate him."

"Why?"

"Because I lost a bet to him and I was forced to come to this dumb camp."

"I understand how you feel." I replied, "My mother made me go because she thought I was fat."

It took a full ten seconds before Eva replied. "Uh … your mother's insane right?"

"Yeah," I agreed but then I smiled, "But as long as we're both being held here against our will, we might as well be miserable together."

Eva smiled too and then jumped down from her bunk on top. When she stood up I found that she was almost my height but just a little taller. Great! Another short person!

With both us in a pact to be miserable with each other, we joined the rest of the cabin and played Jim Rummy until they all were broke and tired from losing.

~*~*~*~

Finally, done with this stupid chapter!!! I'll try to update soon but first:

Replies to Reviews

SweetBliss - Thanks, I really like your stuff too!! No, Spencer is not like Harry, sorry.

Debbirooni - Thank you! I know the way I introduced some of the characters is confusing but
Elizabeth is a teenager who doesn't know the people's names so she just comes up with weird names for them until she finds out their names.

Tenshi-peony - Well . I'm one of those authors, sorry but I really appreciate your review.

Innocent Narcissia - I read Meg Cabot all the time and I love her. I don't think I'd ever get published but thanks for your encouragement!

I'm really really sorry for the long update, but I just haven't been myself lately. This chapter isn't very funny towards the end and I'm sorry for that too.

-Laprisknight88