Monologue: It's Okay To Be Emo


A/N: This was inspired by something someone said while I was chatting online. Also, inspired by a situation my friend was going through, though the outcome was slightly different. Monologues aren't my strong points, but feedback, constructive or not, would be appreciated. Think of this, as a cliché-y monologue.

[SITTING IN A CHAIR, BACKWARDS] Everyday, I see his face. Everyday, I hear his voice. No matter where I am, he seems to be there, but not there physically. I see him in my thoughts, smiling; his jet-black hair ruffled to perfection, his congenial look plastered in the back of my mind.

He runs to me, waving frantically, saying "hi," and I laugh. [SMILES TO SELF] My heart throbs for him, each time he sits next to me, [GESTURES TO EMPTY SEAT ON STAGE LEFT] telling me about everything, at times, getting very emotional. I've seen him cry his eyes out, seen him happy, seen him angry, seen him in a murderous rage; heck, I've seen him in every emotional state possible. He isn't like any other guy. He has nothing to hide, and that's what I admire about him. To anyone, we were just best friends, but to me, I wanted it to be more than that.

[HANDS TO CHEST] He waits with me for my ride after each club meet we have together. At times, he leaves before me, but just the thought of him waiting with me makes me feel—feel special. Occasionally, he leaves with a friendly hug [HUGS SELF] and a "see you tomorrow" before he jumps into the car and rides off. It's those times when I feel warm and loved, when I don't feel alone. He's just about all I live for. It's a tiny obsession. [PAUSES] Okay, a huge obsession.

But, you see, like all best friends we have our slumps. We've had our occasional arguments, and every so often, we didn't talk, giving each other the cold shoulder. In the end, we always got back together and had our usual conversations. We've been through hell and back together. I always thought our friendship would last.

[GETS UP AND WALKS AROUND] And then, one day he comes over with news that tore my heart to shreds. He found someone, someone that he's been head over heels for quite a while. [LOOKS DOWN] I regret not telling him how I really feel about him. We were friends, and nothing more. Since his 'new love,' [QUOTE-UNQUOTE GESTURE] it's like I don't exist anymore. The seat next to me at lunch is always empty. His unique voice slowly fades from my mind. Our friendship level went from ten to zero in a fraction of a second.

[SITS BACK DOWN WITH ARMS PLACED ON BACK OF CHAIR AND HEAD RESTING ON TOP] I wanted to separate the two so badly, but he was so happy, happier than he's ever been in a long time. And like any girl without a brain, she didn't want me to talk to him anymore. Her glares said it all.

[TEAR FALLS] At lunch, I see them around the corner, kissing. Everywhere I turned, they're flirting. Every time she catches me anywhere near the two of them, a glare of daggers is sent my way. If there were one word to describe her, "bitch" would've been it. [WIPES TEAR] Even a "hey" from him would make me feel better, but I should know now that even that isn't possible anymore.

[GETS OFF CHAIR AND LIES DOWN ON FLOOR] He gave me all those hugs, but really, inside, I wanted him to kiss me. [CURLS UP] I didn't want him to let me go, thinking that I'll lose him. [BEGINS TO CRY] But, this time I really did lose him when I least expected it. I've not only lost the person I loved, but my best friend. [SNIVELS] I've always told him that it's okay to be emo, to let out all the emotions, when he was upset. [BLINKS TEARS OUT OF EYES] But, now where is he when I need him to tell me that.