It seemed okay. It seemed alright. This morning's premonitions of doom were all for naught. This wasn't bad. This wasn't – dear Lord! What is that? It appears to be some kind of animal. An ape, perhaps? The slouching shoulders, the deep layers of wrinkles … Did this thing have eyes? They must be buried in those grotesque folds of wrinkled and bunched flesh somewhere halfway down what I assumed to be its face. A mouth, let's see if it has a mouth.

            "Sit down and shut up!"

            Ah! It certainly has a mouth, but where? Perhaps it's just obscured by the hideously large mole on what I think is the face. Find a seat, find a seat! The creature has commanded that I sit. There! An empty spot. Alright, I'm sitting, I'm shut up, what's next? Maybe I can try to decipher a nose through all the wrinkles and that unsightly mole. I thought it said to shut up? Why is everyone talking, laughing, fooling around? Can't you see we're in dire peril? This thing in front of us looks ready to strike at any moment. Oh good, they're quieting down. Joshua, no! Quiet yourself now before the vicious thing attacks! Oh God, too late. It's closing in on him …

            "Idiots like you are the reason education is going down the toilet!"

            Is it snarling? I think it's snarling at him. Its eyes are on me. I can feel it. Do I scream? Do I run? No, just sit. The evil gaze is passing. It appears to be preparing to speak again.

            "My name is Ms. Lester and welcome to your seventh grade history class."