-I'll Never Call You Mine-

"Just go to him and ask him out." My friend said to me.
I'm in the 10th grade and 16 years old. I kind of get jealous of my friend, because she had her first kiss in the 7th grade, and I never a first kiss nor a first boyfriend, like she has. Though, I do have a crush. I've been crushing on this one cute guy, Drew, ever since 3rd grade. I know it is a long time. I didn't tell my friend I had a crush on Drew until the 6th grade. She said with a surprise look on her face, "You do!"
I had kept a journal about Drew. How could I get him out of my mind? He's so cute, and with the hairstyle, he looks so, so. oh, just one word. Cute! But how could I tell him I am in love with him? Every time he says hi to me, I won't even say hi back. And if he says my name, I won't even look at him to see what he wants. I get really, really nervous, my heart pounds, I feel like I am running a fever, I feel like I'm going to get sick, and my hands sweat whenever I see him or he looks at me. I just want to ask him out, but I don't know how to start?
"I gotta get to class!" I say to my friend, and then walk to class. Also, how could I ask him to the Home Coming dance this Thursday?
* * *
That night I was in bed, tossing and turning. How could I get him off my mind? I need to ask him, but I am too, too scared. It's been about seven years I haven't told him. I have to tell him someday, because if I don't then it might be too late. I probably couldn't stand it if he found a date with another, than me. I'd feel so sad. So tomorrow I'm going to ask him. I don't care if I stutter over my words; I just want to ask him. He's
made for me.
The next morning I was in front of my mirror, practicing what I was going to say to Drew. Then my dork-head brother came in and said, "You're talking to yourself, aren't you?"
I hate how my brother just comes in without knocking. Hello, did he ever hear of knocking? I guess not, because I'd dropped him on his head when he was just a baby. Shhh.do not tell anyone.
"I am not talking to myself!"
"You weren't. I thought you were." My brother moved closer to my drawer and started to dig in it.
I said, "Hey, what are you doing?! Get out!" I ran to him.
It was too late; he had my journal and was reading it! "It says that you like a guy named Drew."
"Mom!!!" I yelled.
I started fighting with him. Then I heard footsteps.
It was Mom. "Okay, what's going on?"
"He won't give my journal back!"
He smiled, "Mother, she likes this one guy, Drew!"
I felt so mad that I just wanted to hit him hard in the face. "That's it, you're getting it!"
I give him a wedgie.
"You have a crush!" My mom said.
I just stood there, embarrassed. My brother just let out my deep dark secret, and probably he'll tell all his friends. But there only 3rd graders; they don't know that much about love, do they?
* * *
At the end of the day, when everyone was at his or her lockers too, I went up to Drew. I felt sick to my stomach, but I didn't let that stop me. I have to ask him; it could be my last chance. My heart started to pound. I stuttered over my words as I tried to ask him, "Uh-uh-uh-um, d-do you w- want," I paused. "W-want to go w-with me to the h-h-home com---" he cut me off.
"Home Coming dance, right?" he paused for a minute. "Well, um-uh-um- um, I kind of already got a date. Sorry."
I had tears in my eyes. I shook my head. "It's okay." I walked off.
I was heartbroken.
I walked through the doors and to my car. I sat there, crying. I couldn't believe it.
Then my friend saw me. She walked to the car and got in. "What's the matter?"
"Drew wouldn't go with me to the dance. He had asked someone else, than me."
[I guess I'll never call you mine.] I thought.
Once again, I was heartbroken.

===THE END===