Precious
Chapter One: To Exhale
The cold, harsh wind blew at her short soft, dyed strawberry blonde hair as she stood in front of her driveway awaiting the bus. Her soft, light brown eyes were brimming with crystal tears as she took in a sharp breath and the yellow school bus approached came into sight. Her heart caught and her tears seemed to pour even more as the bus stopped in front of her. The bus's door opened for her and she stepped inside, greeted by warm central heat. She didn't feel it; all she felt was the pain wrenching her heart…
'Mommy, don't go… Mommy-please!' The tears fell, as she held on to her mother's soft, brown hands. "Mommy, I love you so; don't go. I've been a horrible daughter; I wish I could turn back… I'm sorry I wasn't more appreciative. Mom--'
'…I know sweetheart… I love you always; you're my baby girl. I'm sorry for not being there for you as much as I should have before… I was just running, couldn't face the facts. I was deceiving myself, thought I was a good mother… you know? Because I didn't drop you off somewhere… because I didn't have an abortion. Because I didn't abuse you physically. I'll always love you, Sincerity.'
'You are a good mother… You-Mom!' She slipped away. Her hazel eyes closed, and her breath stopped… Sincerity buried her face into her mother's chest, sniffling. 'Goodbye, Mom.'
The tears just wouldn't stop falling. Another flashback. Her life was a nightmare. God it hurt so much to love, it hurt so damn much. "Chris-you promised me… Where are you?"
'I'll always be there for you, Cere. In your heart, mind, body, and soul. Just call on me, and I'll be there for you.' He wrapped his arms around her, and kissed her lightly on her soft, small light brown forehead. 'Trust me. I know you'll be there for me. Always and forever. I'll promise you that.'
"Forever… You promised to me. I love you too, Chris." A couple of people looked over at her strangely as she sat alone in the seventh bus seat, sobbing uncontrollably and seemingly, talking to herself. "I'll never forget. Not ever…"
My mother passed away when I was only fifteen-years old. Left me with 500,000 dollars… 'She's so damned lucky… All that money, I'd hit the mall everyday!' I'd hear them gossip amongst their friends. 'Come on guys! Her mother died, don't be so uncaring. Give her some sympathy.' I'd heard it all I didn't need sympathy… I didn't need to hear the "I understand what you're going through… I've lost someone before" line. It was a lie, they didn't.
"Ms. Christen," the bus driver welcomed me back into reality. The harsh, cold, dark and hurtful world. I hated her. And for that, I cried harder. Hate was such a strong emotion, such a dark emotion. Chris, Caitlyn, Mom… Come back to me! my mind screamed. I wasn't aware of my surroundings anymore; I'd escaped it, run away from it right then. And then, I blacked out. I don't know how, or why but I did.
"Sincerity," I heard a soft voice call. I opened my light brown eyes warily, blinking rapidly, trying to adjust my eyes to the dim light and taking in my surroundings. I was in the nurse and counselor's office. Why? Oh yea, my escape had a price…
"Ms. Christen," the soft voice called again. "Are you alright?" I lifted myself up from the black leather seat and stared up at her, slightly confused. Slowly it registered and I nodded at the slender, blonde haired blue-eyed woman before me. "Would you mind telling me what's on your mind?"
"Yes-I would mind. But I need to talk to someone-my mom would want that." I looked up at her and forced a smile, then I wiped away tears from my face.
The blonde haired woman-Melissa, read her pendant, smiled back…
Mom
,I'll always remember that day when we walked alone in the garden (I was six) and you held my hand, helping me pick out flowers for my grandmother for mother's day. You smiled, laughed and played with my hair. Putting little daises in my hair you acted as though you were happy to have me as your daughter for the first time. The sun was shining bright for hours, bathing us in its warmth. Then slowly, it began to dim. And the clouds took over, dark, and raindrops began to fall… I was afraid that your smile would fade, but it didn't. I thought we'd have to go inside because you said you hated the rain. But we didn't. We played in it, as though you were my age. I felt that you loved me so much then… I never wanted that day to end… I prayed for another just like it…
That memory, I promised myself I'd always look back to; I'd always be grateful for. But I broke that promise…
I closed the book, I couldn't write anymore. My emotions too complex, nothing can ever describe the way I feel right now…
School… How is it? I met this guy, Christopher Bentley. He was just like Chris… Fore that reason, I strayed away from him. I didn't need another Chris. No, not while I still had Christopher Allen in my heart. So beautiful with his dark untamed black hair, and mesmerizing, loving light blue eyes. So much power, and security I felt in those eyes… No one would ever take his place…
Christopher Bentley had untamed black hair as well, only with dark onyx eyes. He seemed friendly enough, just as my Chris had been, only I just couldn't bring myself to like him. Maybe it was the fact that he was an almost exact replica of Chris, but his faults… His eyes hid something; those deep dark black orbs were hiding something behind that charming, beautiful smile… Chris's smile was genuine, nothing hidden…
I balled up a sheet of paper and tossed it into the can. "Sincerity!" Ms. Ryan' said loudly, "Stop drawing and pay attention!"
AN:
I really hoped you liked though this was a piece from me written months ago. I'm not sure how good it is; I'm not even sure if I'll continue it. I just thought I'd post it and see how you liked it for once.~Breathless