Conspiracy Theory # 3

Apples are Evil, and plan to slaughter you while they sleep.


First, the basic facts:

When you try to eat them, they turn brown as quickly as they can to stop you (some people will call this "oxidisation", this is just a government cover-up)

They're very menacing when you look at them. More often than you should, you get ones with dents and scars that make up little angry faces or smirks.

I am right quite often, so I probably am now. (You'll find this in all my arguments.)


So, these are the basic facts about apples, the shocking raw essential information.

So how will they do it. I'll tell you!

The apples, in conjunction with the worms are going to kill all humans.. First, the worms go into the centre of the apples, 4 worms per apple. Then, each worm forms either an "arm" or a "leg" for the apple, giving it the mobility it desires.

Then, when they reach the human, one of the worms THROWS itself into the humans ear, then crawls around eating its brain, killing them, or at least turning them into a blubbering vegetable.

Once a whole lot of the population dies this way, apples will be a able to roam freely as world leaders, with the worms as their "assistants".

And they will give all other fruits an allotment of land. There will be racial hate between some of the fruits and the cucumbers, comments like "you're not a real fruit, you vegetable bastard". Same with tomatoes.

Oh yeah, also, I like ducks. Their fluffy, cute and easy to stuff with dynamite. (joke)


Please Review, and don't bother complaining about me always wanting to blow up ducks. It's a free world (one with feathers floating up in the atmosphere he he.)

R E V I E W, if you've read, good or bad, whatever, just please do one..