The Man Who Turned Everything To Lemons

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Once upon a time there was a man who lived in a MAAAAAAAjical kingdom. But he had a terrible curse.. Nearly everything he touched turned to oval shaped yellow lemons!

(Because of a gypsy curse - "a plague of locusts o'er your land...." But she didnt have any locusts, so she did the thing with lemons.

Anyway, the man, his 17 wives and 32 daughters and lived in a little hut just off eastbridge with a beautiful font yard. And their bathroom, oh you should see it, they've just had it done and its looking lovely. OH OH and they've got that beautiful new lilac paint, its all so nice.. Oh right, the story..

So, the man is sitting in his kitchen, wearing latex gloves, the only thing that didn't turn to lemons when he touched them.

(BY THE WAY, IVE DECIDED TO TURN THIS STORY INTO A MUSICAL, SO KEEP UP!)

(OKAY, I'VE CHANGED BACK NOW, TO NON-MUSICAL)

The family also had a cat, named Fuzzy. Fuzzy brushed up against the man's, whose name was also Fuzzy, clothed leg. Then Fuzzy (the cat) jumped up onto Fuzzy (the man) and pawed at his face.

Lemons went everywhere. Fuzzy (the cat) had touched Fuzzy's (the man) face, instantly turning him (the cat) into whole lotta lemony lemons.

Then, in ran Fuzzy (Fuzzy's (the man) daughter). She said to Fuzzy (the man)

" I can't find fuzzy (the cat)! Have you seen him?"

That's when she saw the lemons, rolling around and around on the purple carpeted kitchen floor.

"Dad! You turned my cat to lemons! That's the third one this month!"

" I'm sorry, honey. I'll get you a new cat." he said as he stroked her hair. But unfortuanately there was a hole his glove and she turned into lemons as well.

"Bummer." he said. We're running short on daughters now.

Thinking, he scratched his head and instantly turned himself into a whole heap of lemons.

Soon, the lemons rolled around, making contact with other things and turning them into lemons, which turned other things into lemons and so on. Eventually there was no earth, and just lots of lemons floating around in space.

The only thing that survived was the worlds supply of latex gloves, which thrived and are currently forming a progressive funk band.

[ps PLEASE REVIEW]

THE END