On the eve of the 12th of March 2004.

I received a forwarded email from a friend, entitled 'I tried it - and it worked!'

So curious I opened this email.

Inside (after the depressing 10 minute downloading time) was a Jesus Christ statue on a cross.

It said underneath

'Lord Jesus I love you and I need you,

Come into my heart, today

For without you I can do nothing.'

Fair enough I thought. Any Christians out there may like this type of email.

Then I kept on reading,

'Pass this message to seven people except you and me.

You will receive a miracle tomorrow.

Don't ignore and god will bless you.'

Now this I laughed at! I mean, could you see god posting out this picture of his son dying to millions, with these words underneath?

'Now I'll just sit back and see who loves me enough to send this out to 7 of their friends.'

Then, next Jesus would walk in 'Father! Did you send that half-naked picture of me too all

my angel friends?' pause, screws up face 'Again!?'

Panics, 'Shit! I must have entered the addresses in wrong!' starts typing hurriedly into keyboard.

'Father, you must stop promoting your self over the web like this, it's addictive.'

'I'm not addicted son! I know all!'

'Fine. Just don't come whinging to me when you get arrested.'

Now, maybe I am being a bit unfair. I mean why wouldn't God own a computer when he made all of us, when he can easily access our minds through dreams or people?

-I'm being sarcastic

With a computer, comes along certain responsibilities

'Shit! What has that son of mine done this time?! The internet isn't working', clicks repeatedly on the mouse 'Jesus! Call the repair man!'

Doesn't quite fit the picture of our all-admiring god, now does it?

Don't get me wrong, this is not to diss God or Jesus in any way. I'm a Christian after all.

This is just a statement about when forwards go to far. The message behind the email is nice. But the fact that you have got to send it onto 7 other people to be blessed is just plain stupid.

God doesn't bless people through email. He's there to help us, like what the beginning poem said.

And my own version: He can lead us through the dark where no light can shine.

It's your choice; I'd just prefer not to participate in this kind of thing.