By:Andrew Troy Keller

Once upon a time,perhaps not too long ago,
I've met this girl who looked like Alyssa Milano,
The star of the TV series 'Charmed' and the best part
Of the meeting was that she had found a place in my heart.
A year later we've gotten married in San Diego.

After that,me and Rhoda--who just happened to be my wife--
Had moved over to Chicago,in order to start a new life.
Halfway towards the Windy City,we've spotted another
Babe,who had a pair of suitcases sitting right next to her.
We've stopped and noticed that she has had enough strife.

So,after we've offered her a ride to anyplace in Chicago,
The Christina Applegate type beauty decided to go
With us and placed her stuff and herself into our car
And we've zoomed away,only to have ourselves go so far,
Before we've finally ran out of fuel and had no
Choice,but to go up to a creepy old house,
Which of course had looked like it wasn't even fit for a mouse.

But suddenly,after we've walked into the creepy pad,
Everyone was having the best sex they've ever had--
And Rhoda and I were thinking,*Are we in the right house?*

Then suddenly,after she had locked the front door
Behind us and started acting like she's been there before,
Our new friend raised her arms and said,"Your Countess
Has returned and along with her new friends,she is
once again ready to rock like never before!"

That was when we saw their teeth turn into fangs and
Their hands into claws,revealing themselves to be a band
Of creatures known as demons,whose hungry eyes had
Turned on us--and it had became really bad,
For 'our friend' turned out to be Queen of the Demon Band.