A/n: Sooo sorry I haven't updated in so long and thank you all
wholeheartedly for now giving up on me! ^^. Especially for those of you who
let me know that I needed to move my ass~! Anyway, here's the next chapter!
This one's long^o^. Oh and if you get bored, feel free to read my other fic
"Apple Blossoms outside the school window". I don't mean to commercialize,
I do realise how annoying that must be. Once again THANK YOU ALL~
~Much love to you all~
~teardrop
Chapter 9: Confusion
Matt followed Aerie through the crowd of students shoving in every direction. He was glad he didn't have to worry about pushing through them. Just like before, he glided through them as if he were a ghost and had no physical form at all. As they went downstairs to the lockers, a familiar voice boomed an enthusiastic "hiya Matt" from behind him. He quickly turned to see Jesse standing beside her ward whose locker was just behind Aerie's.
"So, two whole days of fun ahead, huh? She started in a cheery voice. What the hell was she talking about? Matt asked himself. Then it dawned on him; it must be the weekend, today must have been Friday. He nodded, glancing back at Aerie, his mind was still trying to process the dream he had just taken part in as well as decipher weather it had been real. Jesse shrugged it off and tossed a "have a nice weekend, good luck" over her shoulder as Alex began shoving his way out of the locker room. Aerie had now also gathered her things and followed the other 2 out of the lockers, Matt on her heels. The two stepped out into the schoolyard and both took a deep breath of fresh air. The day had gotten considerably cooler since lunch and the grey clouds overhead now threatened to rain down on them. Matt glanced over at Aerie once more, her hazel eyes turned to him and for a second he could have sworn she was looking at him, until he suddenly heard a hard thud and the girl quickly whipped her head to look at someone behind her, bringing her hand to the back of her head where a rock had just hit.
Without a word she glared at a group of boys standing not too far off laughing their heads off about something hysterically funny. Matt would have probably not recognised any of them were it not for Violet who hadn't bothered to turn away from the scene and was now giggling in a high pitched voice along with another girl with a ponytail similar to her own but with a less memorable appearance. Aerie rubbed her head resentfully then turned away from the group and marched out of the yard with as much dignity as she could muster at that moment.
"Heh, well that was stupid, why didn't you just throw it right back at that fucker?" Matt asked her. Aerie ignored the silent commentary and kept walking, her gaze locked with the cement as if she were about to find the meaning of life there.
"Well, it's your own fault anyway. Why do you dress like that if you don't want that sort of attention? If I was him I'd pick on you too, freak." The angel continued. The two returned to the small house they had left that morning and Aerie retreated to her extremely messy room. The first thing she did was remove all her makeup and change into what Matt judged were normal clothes; an orange shirt and jean shorts. Then, Matt flopped down on the bed for lack of anything better to do while Aerie began scrounging through a pile next to her bed. She frowned as the pile got smaller and smaller and more things flew into other piles around the room. Matt flinched and closed his eyes as a geometry set went directly through his head, hit the wall he was leaning on and fell back onto the bed. This would definitely take some getting used to, he told himself for what seemed to be the millionth time that day.
Aerie finally found what she had been looking for; it was a small sketch book with a horse drawn on the cover to show that the paper was in fact of "excellent" quality. Aerie flipped through the first few pages and opened a blank sheet.
" Oh look, it's a polar bear in a snow storm" Matt commented, glancing over from his spot on the bed and chuckling slightly at his own joke.
Aerie proceeded to flop down on the bed next to him and pulling a pencil from underneath her pillow, began to draw. Matt watched silently. It wasn't very interesting, there was a picture slowly forming of some guy with unruly hair and wearing a t-shirt and jeans. Matt sighed and looked away. He closed his eyes and tried to think of something other then Aerie. He had spent the entire day watching her and thinking about her; it was getting quite annoying. He tried to think about his own life, his mind suddenly went blank. Matt held in a sharp breath and his eyes snapped open. A scary realisation had just punched him in the face; as the day had progressed he was slowly but surely slipping away from the memories of his own life.
"Holy fuck" he whispered to himself. All his life he had pictured everything that happened to him like in a movie, he would picture himself watching everything he did from the side. But now, how could he? His entire life would now have to revolve around this-this strange girl who he knew nothing about and about whom he had no intention of knowing anything! The full force of everything that had happened finally caught up to him after the cool manner in which he had handled it for the entire day.
He was dead. He would never be able to taste ice cream again. He would never be able to come into contact with another human being besides this stupid girl ever again! He would never go where he pleased, he would never be free, he would never turn 18, he would never have a family, or learn to drive. He would never see anyone he knew ever again. Never. The word seemed too long a time to even fully understand. How long was this going to go on?
"Why hadn't I asked?!" He berated himself.
He was DEAD. He suddenly hated the entire world and everybody in it, including himself and this stupid goth loser freak who sat cross-legged on her bed drawing, oblivious to the silent curses that he was throwing her way. Matt closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths; he shut his eyes tightly and clenched his hands into fists. He felt lost, confused, angry and mostly powerless, helpless to change anything about his current predicament. After a few moments of trying to blank his mind, he finally gave up and looked back up at the ceiling, feeling tired. He sighed and closed his eyes once more. This time, falling into a light but dreamless sleep.
He awoke as Aerie shifted on the bed and held out her drawing at arms' length. Matt yawned. He hadn't known he was aloud to sleep as a guardian angel In fact, he hadn't felt the need to eat at all since he had arrived and now that he thought about it, he highly doubted he could physically touch food even if he had. Aerie, sitting very close to him, smiled at her picture. She rarely smiled as he had learnt that day and so he assumed the picture must have truly been spectacular for her to be pleased with it. He felt a lot less resentful after his nap and so he glanced over her shoulder to the drawing.
He gaped. Aerie put the picture down and continued the background. The picture was a portrait of Matt himself sitting cross-legged on a grassy patch. Behind him was a large building. He recognised it as "West Way Elementary School". He stared at himself and then at Aerie.
Now this was strange with a capital S. Satisfied with her drawing, Aerie hopped up from her spot on the bed dropping the sketchbook there and left the room. Matt followed her through the hall and into a small kitchen decorated in light pink wallpaper. The counters were a light green clashing completely with the walls and the white table, which stood against the wall was illuminated by a lamp which hung over it with a pink lampshade, giving everything in the room a slightly pinkish tone, including the old refrigerator and stove on the left wall. On the far wall a balcony door was held open by a fold-in chair and Matt could hear the faint sounds of humming coming from outside.
"Hi mom! Aerie called as she stepped into the kitchen and stuck her head into the fridge.
-How was school? Her mother asked, appearing in the doorframe with a blanket that she had been folding. Aerie's mother was a tall but chubby woman in her late forties. She had long brown hair pulled back in a ponytail and her hazel eyes looked exactly like Aerie's. She was wearing black tights and a large red tee shirt. Matt immediately decided that she seemed pretty nice and sat down in one of the three white chairs that stood at the table. He found it strange that he could sit down on anything considering he had just had a geometry set go through his head only a little while ago, but then, if he went through everything, wouldn't he have fallen through the floor? This thought intrigued him and he decided to test his capabilities further when he would be feeling less lazy.
-Peachy, Aerie answered sarcastically, not even casting a glance at her mom, she took a microwave dish from the fridge and tossed it into the microwave.
-You know you're really annoying with your bitchy melodramatic angst, Matt told Aerie semi-wishing she could hear him.
She was being immature in Matt's opinion. Watching her made him wonder if that's what he had been like in his own lifetime. He could see small glimpses of his existence; a bitchy, angry, angst-filled teenage boy. With this yet another answerless question popped into his head; had he had a guardian angel?
-I should write these down.he told himself out loud.
Aerie's mother had given her a disappointed look and then turned away and went back to hanging clothes up on the rope to let them dry in the warm afternoon air.
The teenaged girl took her rice out of the microwave and after getting some veggies from the fridge proceeded to munch her supper, sitting at the chair opposite of Matt. Looking at the food disappearing from her plate Matt half expected a hungry moan from his empty stomach, but none came. He wasn't in the least hungry, although the food did look good. Afterwards, he watched her devour four spoonfuls of ice cream in front of the 3 channel TV that stood in the small living room further down the hall. At about 11 o'clock Aerie yawned and walked back to her room and into bed.
Matt stood over her bed at a loss; what was he supposed to do until she woke up? He lay down on the ground and attempted to fall asleep once more but sleep eluded him. He debated looking into her dreams again but never got up the courage to give her another kiss. Instead, he watched her sleep thinking about the days' events and about the fact that she seemed extremely peaceful when she slept.
~Much love to you all~
~teardrop
Chapter 9: Confusion
Matt followed Aerie through the crowd of students shoving in every direction. He was glad he didn't have to worry about pushing through them. Just like before, he glided through them as if he were a ghost and had no physical form at all. As they went downstairs to the lockers, a familiar voice boomed an enthusiastic "hiya Matt" from behind him. He quickly turned to see Jesse standing beside her ward whose locker was just behind Aerie's.
"So, two whole days of fun ahead, huh? She started in a cheery voice. What the hell was she talking about? Matt asked himself. Then it dawned on him; it must be the weekend, today must have been Friday. He nodded, glancing back at Aerie, his mind was still trying to process the dream he had just taken part in as well as decipher weather it had been real. Jesse shrugged it off and tossed a "have a nice weekend, good luck" over her shoulder as Alex began shoving his way out of the locker room. Aerie had now also gathered her things and followed the other 2 out of the lockers, Matt on her heels. The two stepped out into the schoolyard and both took a deep breath of fresh air. The day had gotten considerably cooler since lunch and the grey clouds overhead now threatened to rain down on them. Matt glanced over at Aerie once more, her hazel eyes turned to him and for a second he could have sworn she was looking at him, until he suddenly heard a hard thud and the girl quickly whipped her head to look at someone behind her, bringing her hand to the back of her head where a rock had just hit.
Without a word she glared at a group of boys standing not too far off laughing their heads off about something hysterically funny. Matt would have probably not recognised any of them were it not for Violet who hadn't bothered to turn away from the scene and was now giggling in a high pitched voice along with another girl with a ponytail similar to her own but with a less memorable appearance. Aerie rubbed her head resentfully then turned away from the group and marched out of the yard with as much dignity as she could muster at that moment.
"Heh, well that was stupid, why didn't you just throw it right back at that fucker?" Matt asked her. Aerie ignored the silent commentary and kept walking, her gaze locked with the cement as if she were about to find the meaning of life there.
"Well, it's your own fault anyway. Why do you dress like that if you don't want that sort of attention? If I was him I'd pick on you too, freak." The angel continued. The two returned to the small house they had left that morning and Aerie retreated to her extremely messy room. The first thing she did was remove all her makeup and change into what Matt judged were normal clothes; an orange shirt and jean shorts. Then, Matt flopped down on the bed for lack of anything better to do while Aerie began scrounging through a pile next to her bed. She frowned as the pile got smaller and smaller and more things flew into other piles around the room. Matt flinched and closed his eyes as a geometry set went directly through his head, hit the wall he was leaning on and fell back onto the bed. This would definitely take some getting used to, he told himself for what seemed to be the millionth time that day.
Aerie finally found what she had been looking for; it was a small sketch book with a horse drawn on the cover to show that the paper was in fact of "excellent" quality. Aerie flipped through the first few pages and opened a blank sheet.
" Oh look, it's a polar bear in a snow storm" Matt commented, glancing over from his spot on the bed and chuckling slightly at his own joke.
Aerie proceeded to flop down on the bed next to him and pulling a pencil from underneath her pillow, began to draw. Matt watched silently. It wasn't very interesting, there was a picture slowly forming of some guy with unruly hair and wearing a t-shirt and jeans. Matt sighed and looked away. He closed his eyes and tried to think of something other then Aerie. He had spent the entire day watching her and thinking about her; it was getting quite annoying. He tried to think about his own life, his mind suddenly went blank. Matt held in a sharp breath and his eyes snapped open. A scary realisation had just punched him in the face; as the day had progressed he was slowly but surely slipping away from the memories of his own life.
"Holy fuck" he whispered to himself. All his life he had pictured everything that happened to him like in a movie, he would picture himself watching everything he did from the side. But now, how could he? His entire life would now have to revolve around this-this strange girl who he knew nothing about and about whom he had no intention of knowing anything! The full force of everything that had happened finally caught up to him after the cool manner in which he had handled it for the entire day.
He was dead. He would never be able to taste ice cream again. He would never be able to come into contact with another human being besides this stupid girl ever again! He would never go where he pleased, he would never be free, he would never turn 18, he would never have a family, or learn to drive. He would never see anyone he knew ever again. Never. The word seemed too long a time to even fully understand. How long was this going to go on?
"Why hadn't I asked?!" He berated himself.
He was DEAD. He suddenly hated the entire world and everybody in it, including himself and this stupid goth loser freak who sat cross-legged on her bed drawing, oblivious to the silent curses that he was throwing her way. Matt closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths; he shut his eyes tightly and clenched his hands into fists. He felt lost, confused, angry and mostly powerless, helpless to change anything about his current predicament. After a few moments of trying to blank his mind, he finally gave up and looked back up at the ceiling, feeling tired. He sighed and closed his eyes once more. This time, falling into a light but dreamless sleep.
He awoke as Aerie shifted on the bed and held out her drawing at arms' length. Matt yawned. He hadn't known he was aloud to sleep as a guardian angel In fact, he hadn't felt the need to eat at all since he had arrived and now that he thought about it, he highly doubted he could physically touch food even if he had. Aerie, sitting very close to him, smiled at her picture. She rarely smiled as he had learnt that day and so he assumed the picture must have truly been spectacular for her to be pleased with it. He felt a lot less resentful after his nap and so he glanced over her shoulder to the drawing.
He gaped. Aerie put the picture down and continued the background. The picture was a portrait of Matt himself sitting cross-legged on a grassy patch. Behind him was a large building. He recognised it as "West Way Elementary School". He stared at himself and then at Aerie.
Now this was strange with a capital S. Satisfied with her drawing, Aerie hopped up from her spot on the bed dropping the sketchbook there and left the room. Matt followed her through the hall and into a small kitchen decorated in light pink wallpaper. The counters were a light green clashing completely with the walls and the white table, which stood against the wall was illuminated by a lamp which hung over it with a pink lampshade, giving everything in the room a slightly pinkish tone, including the old refrigerator and stove on the left wall. On the far wall a balcony door was held open by a fold-in chair and Matt could hear the faint sounds of humming coming from outside.
"Hi mom! Aerie called as she stepped into the kitchen and stuck her head into the fridge.
-How was school? Her mother asked, appearing in the doorframe with a blanket that she had been folding. Aerie's mother was a tall but chubby woman in her late forties. She had long brown hair pulled back in a ponytail and her hazel eyes looked exactly like Aerie's. She was wearing black tights and a large red tee shirt. Matt immediately decided that she seemed pretty nice and sat down in one of the three white chairs that stood at the table. He found it strange that he could sit down on anything considering he had just had a geometry set go through his head only a little while ago, but then, if he went through everything, wouldn't he have fallen through the floor? This thought intrigued him and he decided to test his capabilities further when he would be feeling less lazy.
-Peachy, Aerie answered sarcastically, not even casting a glance at her mom, she took a microwave dish from the fridge and tossed it into the microwave.
-You know you're really annoying with your bitchy melodramatic angst, Matt told Aerie semi-wishing she could hear him.
She was being immature in Matt's opinion. Watching her made him wonder if that's what he had been like in his own lifetime. He could see small glimpses of his existence; a bitchy, angry, angst-filled teenage boy. With this yet another answerless question popped into his head; had he had a guardian angel?
-I should write these down.he told himself out loud.
Aerie's mother had given her a disappointed look and then turned away and went back to hanging clothes up on the rope to let them dry in the warm afternoon air.
The teenaged girl took her rice out of the microwave and after getting some veggies from the fridge proceeded to munch her supper, sitting at the chair opposite of Matt. Looking at the food disappearing from her plate Matt half expected a hungry moan from his empty stomach, but none came. He wasn't in the least hungry, although the food did look good. Afterwards, he watched her devour four spoonfuls of ice cream in front of the 3 channel TV that stood in the small living room further down the hall. At about 11 o'clock Aerie yawned and walked back to her room and into bed.
Matt stood over her bed at a loss; what was he supposed to do until she woke up? He lay down on the ground and attempted to fall asleep once more but sleep eluded him. He debated looking into her dreams again but never got up the courage to give her another kiss. Instead, he watched her sleep thinking about the days' events and about the fact that she seemed extremely peaceful when she slept.